The Best 83 Recipe Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Recipe jokes. There are some recipe leftover jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these recipe formula puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Recipe Jokes and Puns

So I invented a new beef and vegetable recipe, but it wasn't so great...

It was meaty-okra.

Did you hear, there's no more ice in Poland?

The old lady with the recipe died...

What's the difference between a zoo in Louisiana and a zoo anywhere else?

In Louisiana, next to the plaque with the animal's name, they've got a good recipe.

Recipe joke, What's the difference between a zoo in Louisiana and a zoo anywhere else?

gypsy omelette recipe...

First steal some eggs

Why couldn't the blonde make icecubes?

because she lost the recipe.


How does every Romanian recipe start?

1. Steal a chicken.

From an old family friend.

Why was there a russian spy in Quebec?

He wanted to find a good Putin recipe.

Recipe joke, Why was there a russian spy in Quebec?

A man brought some cookies to a party...

His friend approached him later during the party. He asked for the recipe to show his wife.

"You see, the secret trick is that I put the dough in my belly button to measure out the perfect size of each cookie," he tells his friend.

"That's absolutely disgusting," says the friend.

He answers, "Oh, you're not going to like the way I make donuts then."

Does anyone have a recipe for sausage and apples?

I asked my girlfriend what she wanted tonight and she said she could use a wiener in cider.

Simple recipe for making your own naturally-smoked, organic meats...

Start a forest fire.

What's the difference between an American zoo and a Chinese zoo?

An American zoo will only have a description of the animal. The Chinese zoo has the price and recipe of the animal.

You can explore recipe instructions reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean recipe flour dad jokes. There are also recipe puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


I was desperate, I *needed* a recipe for Indian bread!

But I found naan...

If Chile and Turkey had a war...

Would that be a recipe for disaster?

Would Greece get involved?

I thought the recipe was for making margarine, however,

it churned out to be butter.

Why did the butter maker not tell anybody his secret recipe?

He was afraid they'd spread it around.

Why did the blonde throw tic-tacs in her spaghetti?

The recipe told her to mints her garlic.

Recipe joke, Why did the blonde throw tic-tacs in her spaghetti?

The recipe said to crush the garlic

So I told it, "You'll never amount to anything!"

I've compiled my bucket list.

I've compiled my bucket list.
4 drumsticks, 4 thighs, original recipe, 2 individual mashed potatoes with gravy, and 2 biscuits.

I decided to try out a new Mediterranean recipe that takes 2 hours to cook.

I've got a lot of thyme on my hands.


How many feminists does it take to make a sandwich?

12

One to make the sandwich,

One to excoriate men for creating hunger,

One to blame men for inventing such a laborious recipe,

One to suggest the whole "putting meat in between two non-consenting flaps of bread" bit to be too "rape-like",

One to deconstruct the Bologna sausage itself as being phallic,

One to blame men for not making the sandwich,

One to blame men for trying to make the sandwich instead of letting a woman do it,

One to blame men for creating a society that discourages women from eating,

One to blame men for creating a society where women make too many sandwiches,

One to advocate that sandwich makers should have wage parity with Michelin star chefs,

One to alert the media that women are now "out-sandwiching" men,

And one to take pictures for her blog for photo-evidence that men are unnecessary.

What is the difference between northern and southern zoos?

Southern zoos have a description of the animals along with a recipe.

If James Bond movies were about food...

These could be their titles:

* On Her Majesty's Secret Recipe

* Donuts are Forever

* Octopie

* Moonbaker

* The Spy Who Loved Meat

* License to Grill

* GoldenPie

* Diet Another Day

* All The Food In The World Is Not Enough

* Cashew Chicken Royale

I found a good bread recipe where you don't have to get your hands messy from mixing it

The bread was kneadless, to say

How do you tell the difference between a Northern and a Southern zoo?

A Northern zoo has a large plaque in front of each animal cage. The plaque list the genus, species, common name, average life span, habitat and diet of the animal.

A Southern zoo has a recipe in from of each animal cage.

I found a new recipe that's fat free, gluten free, sugar free, dairy free, preservative-free and is non-GMO.

It's a real breath of fresh air.

My recipe for vodka-flavoured brats never caught on.

It was the Absolut wurst.

I recently acquired my grandmother's secret recipe for ragus. She was an accomplished chemist, and managed it with only one ingredient:

invert sugar.

I was given a recipe book for roadkill recently

I collected some roadkill and followed the recipe. It tasted good but I have no idea what to do with his bike.

I was given a recipe book for roadkill the other day

So I went out and got some, and it was delicious. Recipe didn't say anything about the leftover bike though

My friend surprised me for my birthday with a book called 'Road-Kill Recipes'

I did find some road-kill the other day, so I cooked it according to one recipe and it was delicious. I'm just not sure what I should do with the bicycle.

I have a simple recipe for eggnog...

It's one part rum.

my medium rare chicken recipe was a complete failure

I guess it was a half baked idea.

I have a super secret baking recipe for bread

...Unfortunately it's on a knead to dough basis

Why was the chef was devestated to find a recipe torn out of his cookbook?

...it was his main sauce of income.

Recipe for a trump sandwich.

2 slices of white bread.
Full of balogna.
Russian dressing.
And a tiny little pickle.

What do you call a brewmaster that wears a bright purple robe and carries around an enormous recipe book?

An Ale Chemist.

Truly delicious tofu recipe:

1) Chuck the tofu.

2) Fry a juicy steak.

I have a new recipe that's gluten free, sugar free, no-fat, non-GMO, pesticide free, low-calorie, vegan, kosher and paleo-friendly.

It's a real breath of fresh air.

I was watching a french man make a cake...

I admired his enthusiasm. He grabbed the flour, added it to the bowl, and started adding the wet ingredients. Intrigued about his recipe, I asked "hey man, how many eggs did you use for your cake?"

The French man replied, "un oeuf."

What made the Scottish man decide to cremate his wife?

A recipe instructed him to place his bird in the oven for 6 hours.

Never go to a party where a scientist is doing the cooking.

If they're a physicist, everything will come out underdone because they'll have assumed a closed energy system.

If they're a biologist, you'll never actually get to eat anything because they'll insist on first feeding it to the cat, waiting a year, feeding it to your neighbour, and then waiting another year.

And if they're a chemist, they'll follow the recipe perfectly, but insist on doing everything ten times to avoid random error.

I tried using the internet to look for a good pie recipe

A recipe for disaster.

The product? Trumpkin Pai.

Be careful on the roads tonight

Lots of people will be drinking excessively and letting their wives drive. Recipe for disaster.

My mom accidentally put in more butter than what was called for in the recipe.

It was only a marginal error.

I have a top secret bread recipe

I'd tell you but, it's on a knead to dough basis

A worldwide chickpea shortage has caused Humus makers to add more lemon to the recipe

Retailers are expecting sales to fall and are prepared for a sharp dip.

Over half of UK KFC stores have closed down after switching chicken suppliers.

It was an original recipe for disaster.

What's the difference between a Yankee zoo and a Southern zoo?

The Yankee zoo will have the name of the animal and its Latin name. The Southern zoo will have the name of the animal and a recipe.

Bad Facebook...

...you ate all my cookies and gave away the recipe

What's the difference between a brick and a red velvet cake?

Not much, if we're going off my mother-in-law's recipe.

I had great chicken today

The recipe was pretty standard but the chicken had done a lot for humanity

Literary historians recently found a Briton recipe for a citrus-based sauce translated by Samuel Taylor Coleridge

It was called the 'Lime of the Ancient Marinade'

I asked my local baker for her amazing bread recipe.

She said it's on a knead to dough basis.

They say Luis Fonsi started his own artisan donut shop recently, he specializes in habanero flavored donuts

When asked for his recipe, he just said they were made with the spicy dough

Happiness recipe.

I've found the recipe for happiness. Can someone just send me some money so that I can buy the ingredients?

An Ethiopian recipe

.

I collect old cookery books

I have a page from the chef's cookery book from The Hindenberg - a recipe for disaster!

I found an easy cookie recipe that said to put all the ingredients in one bowl and beat it.

I'm not sure what good it did though, when I came back nothing had changed.

Babies are like the total opposite of a complicated dinner recipe

It's more fun to make one than it is to eat one.

I hacked the recipe computers

at the Campbell's Soup Company. Do you want me to post them in their entirety,

Or just the condensed version.

Some guy tried to steal my recipe for Indian bread.

I told him: It's naan of your business.

I've got a great recipe for popcorn stuffed duck.

It's called Quacker Jacks

I finally found a recipe that is gluten free, fat free, dairy free and contains no sugar.

It's a breath of fresh air.

If a recipe calls for you to turn off the heat and begin mincing your herbs to add to the dish, that step would be called:

Stop. Hammer thyme.

We are making White Russians to celebrate the Mueller report release, but I can't remember the recipe.

Kahlua-sion or no kahlua-sion?

Q: Ice is no longer available in the drinks at the cafeterias at Oregon?

A: The senior who knew the recipe graduated.

Bride

The night before her wedding, the bride-to-be talked with her mother. "Mom," she said, "I want you to teach me how to make my new husband happy."

The mother took a deep breath and began, "When two people love, honor, and respect each other, love can be a very beautiful thing..."

"I know how to f*ck, mother," the bride-to-be interrupted.
"I want you to teach me your lasagna recipe."

David Foster Wallace writes a simple seafood recipe...

1. This is water
2. Consider the lobster

At a doctors office I saw this in a magazine (true story)

**Pg. 15**: you're beautiful, love yourself the way you are.

**Pg. 16:** how to lose 5 pounds in one week.

**Pg. 17**: best cake recipe ever!

Ordered some spices online a while back to enhance my roast chicken recipe, unfortunately due to the pandemic I was told the package would be delayed.

But today is the day, the thyme has finally come.

My fruit salad is now all currants.

I updated the recipe when I realized I was out of dates.

The recipe said, Set the oven to 180 degrees.

Now I have no idea what to do, because the oven door is facing the wall.

The recipe said to put my cake in the oven at 180 degrees.

I did, and it fell out.

Since its my cake day

I used to work at a very large balery known for making some of the most exquisite and famous cakes.

These cakes required a very intricate and delicate process to make them and involved a lot of processes and a secret recipe.

However in all my 20 years, the head baker never told me the full recipe only my part required in the preperartion.

He always told me that Bakers only trade recipes on a Knead to know basis.

An Irish guy is making chili for a fall cookoff

He just recently immigrated and forgot the recipe back home.

He goes to his wife, 'Mary, I forgot the recipe. How many beans am I supposed to put in?'

Mary responds: '239.'

Why my love?

Mary: any more would be too farty

Today a large shipment of Chinese dumplings was thrown to the ground and smashed into crumbs by vandals who are unhappy with a change in the savory treat's recipe.

Local officials are said to be appalled by the wonton destruction.

I caught my wife adding yeast to my beloved flatbread recipe;

But I know she's just trying to get a rise out of me

What recipe uses chicken and elephant parts?

Chicken Dumbo

What recipe uses chicken, shrimp, okra, and elephant sausage?

Dumbolaya

The recipe said to put the pot in at 180 degrees

Now it's all over the bottom of the oven

Instructions said to preheat oven at 180 degrees

Not sure i'll try this recipe again, turning the oven upside down was a real back breaker...

Aunt Millie's secret recipe has been stolen by Sara Lee's brother.

Alleged Lee.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the recipe cookbook jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working recipe meatloaf piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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