Receptive Jokes
96 receptive jokes and hilarious receptive puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about receptive that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Receptive Short Jokes
Short receptive jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The receptive humour may include short jokes also.
- At a wedding reception, the best man said, 'would all the married men please stand next to the person that made their lives worth living.' The poor bartender was crushed to death.
- My wife and I got married under a cell phone tower. The ceremony wasn't great, but the reception was perfect.
- Two antennae get married on a roof The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was *amazing*!
- I saw on the news that the CEOs of T-mobile and Sprint got married last weekend. Great wedding, terrible reception.
- Did you guys hear about the two cellphone towers that got married? It was a nice ceremony, but the reception was *amazing.*
- 2 antennas met on a roof. They fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much but the reception was incredible!
- What kind of cell phone reception do astronauts get on the moon? 1/6 G
My 8 year old son came up with this one. - Two satellite dishes met on a roof... They hit it off and decided to get married. The ceremony was boring but the reception was great!
- Why is cellphone reception so good in Wisconsin Even the smallest towns have at least 4 bars
- I was checking in a hotel, and the guy at reception told me that my room was upgraded. I said, Sweet!
Reception guy: Exactly Sir.
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Receptive One Liners
Which receptive one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with receptive? I can suggest the ones about and .
- The CEO of AT&T just got married... The service was okay, but the reception was terrible.
- I went to this TV repairman's wedding The reception was great.
- Two antennas got married. The reception was great.
Source: Unsure, saw it on FB. - Two satellites get married The wedding was alright, but the reception was amazing!
- You can't get good signal reception at a cemetery It's a dead spot.
- Two antennas got married. Wedding ceremony was a disaster. But reception was really good.
- I went to a wedding in a Faraday cage... There was no reception
- Two 5G cell phone engineers got married. The wedding stunk but the reception was great!
- My phone got married last week. The service was good despite the lousy reception.
- I want all buildings to have a reception area. I think I'll lobby for it.
- My sister in law got the covid vaccine yesterday. Her 5g reception has never been better
- You didn't hear the joke about cell phones? Probably because it had a bad reception
- Guy married his car antenna The wedding was terrible, but the reception was great!
- what does cellphone reception and princess diana have in common? They both die in tunnels
- I tried to call the front desk of my hotel. Needless to say, I couldn't get reception.
Receptive Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about receptive you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make receptive pranks.
I proposed my Russian girlfriend and she said Yes!
For the wedding, my whole family and friends flew over to her home town of Moscow.
It was a beautiful ceremony, however I did find some things strange. For instance, the priest never said, "You may now kiss the bride", but I just assumed it was purely an American thing and didn't mind.
Later during the reception, we were both starving and decided to head over to the buffet to get food. On the way we passed the drink table, where about six people were waiting to get a fruity drink from a bowl.
As we passed, they all said in unison, "You may now kiss the bride!" My wife got giddy and gave me a big kiss, which I of course returned.
As we walked away I asked, "Why did *they* tell us to kiss and not the priest?"
My wife answered,
"In Soviet Russia, the punchline tells you!"
An Indian man arrives at the reception of a hotel...
An Indian man arrives at the reception of a hotel and asks for a room for the night. The receptionist says "of course, sir, do you have a reservation?"
To which he replies "I'm not that kind of Indian!"
Two middle aged gentlemen are seated next to each other at a wedding reception
Gentleman 1: Not too long ago the bride used to play in my lap. Look at her now, getting married, looking so pretty...
Gentleman 2: You must be her uncle, right?
Gentleman 1: Nope. I am her boss.
Why did the chef add extra oregano to the sauce?
He was making up for lost thyme.
Thank you, thank you. I'll just show myself out now.
*Wow, thanks! I was expecting a much chilier reception, but your warm comments have kept those fears at bay (that's what you get for encouraging me :)*
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Granny's boyfriend
A 5 yr old boy went to visit his grandmother one day.
While playing with his toys in her bedroom while Grandma was dusting, he looked up and said, "Grandma, how come you dont have a boyfriend?"
Grandma replied, "Honey, my TV is my boyfriend. I can sit in my bedroom and watch it all day long. The TV evangelists keep me company and make me feel so good. The comedies make me laugh. I'm really happy with the TV as my boyfriend."
Grandma turned on the TV and the reception was terrible. She started adjusting the knobs, trying to get the picture in focus. Frustrated, she finally started hitting the backside of the TV, hoping to fix the problem. The little boy heard the doorbell ring, so he hurried to open the door, and there stood a man.
The man said, "Hello, son, is your grandma home?"
The little boy replied, "Yeah, but she's in the bedroom b**... her boyfriend."
A couple of TV antennas...
got married, the ceremony was a little boring, but the reception was great!
Really dissappointed with cell reception these days.
I mean, we're gonna be here for a while. We could at least try to get along.
Did you hear about the riot at the bar mitzvah reception?
There were mazel tov cocktails everywhere!
Two antennas met on a rooftop...
...they fell in love and got married. I heard the ceremony was pretty average... but the reception was excellent!
Why did AT&T have the worst wedding?
No reception.
Two TV antennas were just married.
The ceremony was nothing special, but the reception was great.
Scientists have discovered a Gene that makes women more receptive to threesomes
It's a recessive gene though, so both parents have to not love her for the trait to manifest.
What is the worst joke you have ever Heard?
I'll start it off: Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The Ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Did you hear about the phone that gives o**... s**...?
The reception's pretty good, but the phone itself blows.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A drunk staggered up to the h**...
A drunk staggered up to the hotel reception desk and demanded his room be changed.
"But sir," said the clerk, "you have the best room in the hotel."
"I insist on another room!!" said the drunk.
"Very good, sir. I'll change you from 502 to 555. Would you mind telling me why you don't like 502?" asked the clerk.
"Well, for one thing," said the drunk, "it's on fire."
Did you hear about the guy that got married to a T.V. antenna?
I guess the wedding was boring, but the reception was great.
The cellphone company invited me to their party
but there turned out to be no reception.
What did the cat say when he lost cell phone reception?
Can you hear me meow?
I'll ^see ^^myself ^^^out
A guy enters a wedding reception
He walks up to the bartender and asks, "Is this the punch line?"
Reception
-An antenna and a satellite dish meet on a roof. The get married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
Did you hear about the two radios that fell in love?
The wedding was boring but the reception was terrific.
A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette are driving through the desert.
The car breaks down, and they've got no cell reception, so they have to walk to get help. The brunette says "I'll grab the bottled water in case we get thirsty." The redhead says, "I'll grab the snacks in case we get hungry."
The blonde rips the drivers side door off its hinges. "I'll take this door, so if we get hot, I can roll the window down."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
f**... homes are a great place to hit on women.
No matter how many times you punch them, they will never complain about it.
Or: They might give you the cold shoulder at first, but if you keep at it, they'll eventually warm up to you.
Or: Because of recent trauma in their lives, they are very receptive to having s**....
A tourist is travelling down the Rhine
He books himself into an old castle that has been converted into a hotel. Once he enters, he has the creepiest feeling come over him. He asked the lady a reception if they have ghosts in the hotel. She laughs and says, " I have been here for 300 years and never seen one"
Went to a French-Spanish wedding reception.
The buffet was alright, but the wedding cat was delicious.
Did you heard about the mariage of the two radios ?
It seems like they got a good reception.
Samsung's chairman has been freed from jail
Sources say he couldn't be charged, but when he went outside he was greeted with an excellent reception.
A chess player was travelling abroad for a tournament
He managed to find a room at a small hotel. Upon entering the room, he immediately knew something was wrong and briskly made his way back to reception.
"Is something wrong?" the receptionist asked, startled by the man's disgruntled demeanour.
The man exclaimed "I thought I paid for room and board!"
In a world controlled by AI and machines, two satellites decide to get married...
...Well the wedding wasn't too romantic but that reception was amazing!
I made a phone call to a friend to tell them a new joke.
It didn't get very good reception.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I was staying in a hotel last night.
I phoned down to reception. Hi, this is room 26 Can I have a wake up call, please? She said Yes, you're in your mid 30s, Single, live with your mother and have achieved nothing in life!"
There's an angel stuck in my T.V. antenna...
At least I have immaculate reception.
Man calls up, "Is this reception?" but the line goes dead.
For a brief moment, yes, it was reception.
A man survives Hiroshima and wakes up in the hospital
Man: What happened and why am I here?
Nurse: hiroshima was hit by a bomb and despite all odds you survived. Right now you are at the hospital getting treated but you have no risk of dying so no worries.
Man: Thank god. But how about my family? Are they ok also?
Nurse: Don't worry, they all evacuated safely and are waiting at the reception room
Man: That is great news. So where am I?
Nurse: Nagasaki
A guy walks into a wedding reception and goes over to the bar and asks
Is this the punch line?
My librarian keeps a gerbil in a cage at the reception desk. I asked her, "Why did you name the gerbil Edgar Rice?" "Because," she responded,
"Edgar Rice burrows."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
At a wedding reception, the groom's grandfather stood up to make his toast. Having been married for 60 years, he wanted to pass on his secret to the newlyweds. The grandfather addressed the happy couple, saying the tip to a happy and long lasting marriage is to beat your wife up every morning.
An uncomfortable silence followed. The grandfather continued, yes, I beat my wife up every morning. I get up around 6:30 and she gets up around 8.
After a wedding
After a wedding, an elderly lady named Enna is nowhere to be found. The groom is frantic and tells his bride the festivities cannot continue. When she asks why, he says,
Without Aunt Enna, no reception.
An American checks into a London hotel having had a bad day
An American checks into a London hotel having had a bad day. He asks the receptionist where the elevator is.
He is told the lift is around the corner from reception.
The American says It's called AN ELEVATOR! WE INVENTED IT!
The receptionist replies Yes sir, but we invented the language and so it's a lift.
An electrician installed two aeriels on the same roof . . .
The aeirels quickly fell in love, went on many dates and were soon married. The wedding went off without a hitch . . .
But there was no reception.
My friend and I were late for a meeting
My friend and I were late for a meeting
We'd never been in that particular building before and we were lost.
My friend opened the wrong door and it turned out to be for a wedding reception.
After he closed the door, he seemed embarrassed and I said to him, "You look like you've seen a toast."
Two ducks check into a hotel for their honeymoon. The we're making out and the male duck said I forgot to bring any condoms! So he phones reception to see if they can help out. Condoms? Of course sir. Should I put them on your bill? ...
No way! If you did that I'd suffocate!
Did you hear about the wedding put online because of Covid-19?
I was a bit disappointed I couldn't physically be there but at least the reception was good.
My phone was not working in the hotel room
I had to go downstairs . They had reception there
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A wealthy billionaire dies, and his final wish is to be buried with his money.
So, at the f**... reception, the widow is speaking with guests when the matter of the billionaire's last wish comes up. The widow confirms that she honored her late husband's request.
A friend says to the widow, "You really buried him with billions of dollars?!", and the widow replies, "Of course, I wrote him a check."
I just got my COVID-19 vaccine today
I don't understand what everyone is so worried about, I haven't experienced any strange side effects. This thing is completely safe.
In unrelated news, I finally have good cell phone reception and my Internet speeds have never been better!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I just got back from the f**... of my 82 year old neighbour who died after falling off his roof when fixing his TV antenna.
The f**... was sad, but the reception was excellent.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Telephone at the hotel reception:
\- Hello, I'm calling from room 303. Could you please send someone from the service? I'm arguing with my wife and she threatened to jump out the window.
\- Sorry, this is your private problem.
\- Yeah, right, but the d**... window doesn't open, and that's your problem.
My ex husband cheated during our wedding reception
I guess it really was a black tie affair
An armed masked man bursts into a bank yelling "EVERYBODY PUT YOUR HANDS UP, THIS IS A ROBBERY!"
The patrons and staff, terrified, comply.
He's loading up his sack with cash when his mask slips off. He quickly pulls it back up and sees two guys who may have seen his face. He points his gun at the first.
"Did you see my face?"
"Yes"
BANG, he shoots him.
He then points it at the second guy.
"Did you see my face?"
The second guy points at a woman sitting far off in the reception area.
"No, but my mother in law did!"
A couple of years ago, I was staying at a tiny Spanish Inn
A couple of years ago, I was staying at a tiny spanish Inn when I started to feel ill. Needing a doctor, I rang reception who said they'd get the hotel doctor to visit. I was rather surprised that such a small place would have a house doctor, and was just telling the manager this when my room door burst open and in leapt a man yelling "Nobody expects the Spanish Inn physician!"
(True story) After reaching the height of his fame, Alec Guinness went into a restaurant and dropped his jacket off at the reception..
When it was time to give his name, the Receptionist told him it wasn't necessary. Feeling flattered, Alec went to his table..
At the end of the night, he went to pick up his jacket. In the pocket of his jacket, there was the ticket stub. On the ticket stub, where his name was supposed to be, it said old man with glasses .
A couple are on holiday on a pacific island...
When they arrive they hear a constant drum beat; the ask the taxi driver and he says "Drums must never stop!"
They get to the hotel and the drumming is still going, so they ask the cleaner and she says "Drums must never stop!"
The drums continue all night and the couple can't sleep. Exhausted, they storm down to reception and ask about the noise. "Drums must never stop!", says the concierge.
"But why?!" demand the couple.
"Because when drums stop... Bass solo begins!"
How's the wedding planning coming on, John?
John: "We're having a slight difference of opinion. She wants a big church wedding, large reception, small orchestra, the works. I want to elope with someone else."
I was at a wedding reception…
When I noticed the woman sitting opposite me kept staring until finally she spoke.
Every time you smile, I want to take you back to my place
In my excitement I asked if she was single.
No she replied. I'm a Dentist
A furious lady marches into the eye clinic's reception area and shouts at the receptionist, "Who stole my wig during my eye surgery yesterday?"
The doctor immediately rushes out to pacify her. "I assure you, no one on my team would do such a thing. What makes you think it was stolen?"
The woman replies, "Well, before the procedure, my wig was perfect, but when I woke up, it was a tangled mess, and made me look ugly and cheap."
"I think," says the surgeon gently, "this means your cataract operation was a success."