Rating Jokes
63 rating jokes and hilarious rating puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about rating that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Maximize your performance rating when telling jokes! Learn how to rate your jokes on a scale from 1-10 in order to get a better understanding of your performance. Plus discover which topics are sure to get a laugh from the crowd. From funny anecdotes to the more outrageous Rammstein jokes, you'll be a hit in no time.
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Funniest Rating Short Jokes
Short rating jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The rating humour may include short rate jokes also.
- In Jamaica, a slice of pie costs $3.50. In the Bahamas, a slice of pie costs $5.50. These are the pie rates of the caribbean.
- I asked a girl to rate me out of 10 the other day She said "you're an 8 on a scale of 10"
I still don't understand why she wanted me to urinate on a skeleton - 1 slice of apple pie will cost you $2.45 in Jamaica. A slice of apple pie costs $3.75 in Trinidad and the same slice costs $4.45 in Barbados. And those are the Pie-Rates of the Caribbean.
- The Robinhood app has a rating of 4.7 stars in the app store. But current market conditions prevent us from allowing investors to add new star. You may only remove stars until conditions improve.
- Did you know that you can get a slice of lemon pie in cuba for $1.50 and in jamaica you can get key lime pie for $1.00? Those are the pie rates of the carribean.
- There Once Was A Poet Named Bates, His poems weren't always first rate,
His first lines weren't bad, but the problem he had,
Was that he always tried to put too many syllables into the last line. - Why does Japan have a low obesity rate and a low birth rate? They don't like Fat Man and Little Boy
- TIL Texas is called the lone star state because it was the minimum allowed in a 5 star rating system
- A slice of pie costs $3.50 in Barbados, $3.00 in Saint Lucia, $2.50 in Belize, and $2 in Cuba.
Those are the pie rates of the Caribbean. - Movie Ratings Explained G: Nobody gets the girl.
PG: The good guy gets the girl.
R: The bad guy gets the girl.
X: Everybody gets the girl!
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Rating One Liners
Which rating one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with rating? I can suggest the ones about rank and score.
- Why did elon musk go broke? Because his car insurance rates were astronomical.
- Why don't alien visit our solar system? Terrible ratings. One star.
- Whats Saudi Arabia's highest rated sitcom? How I bought your mother
- 3.14% of sailors are... π-rates.
- Girl if I had to rate you, I'd give you a 10 Oh the pH scale, because girl you are basic.
- String Fight My ex used to hit me with stringed instruments. If only I had known about her history of violin.
- 3.14% of all sailors are Pi-rates! (Have a great pi-day)
- I'm so dumb and out of shape My resting heart rate is higher than my IQ
- I went online and rated our Solar System Gave it one star.
- Why don't aliens visit Earth Bc we have 1 star rating...
- Why were birth rates low in 1970? You can't get pregnant during '69.
- Vladimir Putin's approval rate is 80%... The other 20% are missing.
- If I had to rate the solar system I'd give it one star.
- I just bought a movie with 3.142 stars out of 5 It was a pi rated DVD
- How would you rate USA and Saudi Arabia's relationship? 9/11
Rating Pg Jokes
Here is a list of funny rating pg jokes and even better rating pg puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why couldn't Batman go to the movie? Because it was rated "PG"
- Who can watch an R rated movie but not a PG? Batman
- How do you get a billionaire to donate their fortune to Planned Parenthood? Take them to a PG rated movie.
- What rating do pirate movies always get? PG-13
- Any golf jokes? Was hoping you guys would have a few golf jokes for when I play my first game tomorrow. From PG to R rated is fine with me ;)
- Why couldn't the 5 year old go to the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13.
- Why was the p**...'s movie rated PG-13? It only had minor n**....
Rating Rotten Jokes
Here is a list of funny rating rotten jokes and even better rating rotten puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Hotel Rwanda got a 90% rating on Rotten Tomatoes... But their rating on Yelp was terrible.
- Did you know movies highly rated by Rotten Tomatoes like the new Star Wars movies, the Harry Potter movies, and the Marvel movies are oscar-nominated? Oscar likes trash!
- Just because you like a movie that has a terrible rating on "Rotten Tomatoes" doesn't mean the film is underrated.... It means you have bad taste

Performance Rating Jokes
Here is a list of funny performance rating jokes and even better performance rating puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- How does a chemist rate a party He performs a lit-ness test
- The falling man. I rate his performance a 9/11.

Comical Rating Jokes and Gems that Will Get You in Laughter Land
What funny jokes about rating you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean grade jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make rating pranks.
Why did the bra shop have a low rating?
There were many complains about poor customer support
A joke my 8 year old brother told me. G rating
Why dont you take a pokemon to the bathroom.
Because it might pi-ka-chu
How does R. Kelly respond when girls ask for a rating on a ten scale?
Urinate
What's the difference between a review of David Blaine's act and Bill Cosby on rollerblades?
One is rating an escapist, the other is a skating r**....
I enjoy rating countries on a 0-10 scale
I give Nepal a solid 7.8. The score is so high, it's ground breaking
People have started rating h**... clinics on trip advisor
The one time you don't want a positive review.
What rating did Moody's give to the sheep?
BAAA
The Violin Ensemble playing in Carnegie Hall somehow got an R-18 rating...
The censors say it contains explicit scenes of violins encore.
Which gun has a perfect rating?
A Five-seven.
TIL the Airbus A380, the world's largest passenger airliner, shares a type rating with yo momma!
Clearly we need more nerdy yo momma jokes.
Going to watch a movie in theater
Me: This movie is pirated
Friend: How?
Me: This movie has got 3.14 rating
People think that Donald Trump is a good choice for president because he has no experience
That's like saying the Unabomber was fiscally responsible because he didn't have a credit rating.
I found a rating for the Sun online.
It was only a star.
Did you know Auschwitz has the highest hotel rating?
1.1 million stars
What's my rating from 1 to 10 for Harry Potter?
Nine and three quarters.
My rating on the New Star Wars film.
3.5 out of 7
Earth only has a 1 star rating.
Any more than that, and everything would burn up.
Funniness and cleverness have always been two notable factors for rating puns...
...but the third has groan in significance.
Why do programmers make terrible dates?
They take you out for Java and try to get you to bed.
To make matters worse, their skills in the bedroom is pretty BASIC so they only ever get a C++ rating.
A guy walks past a girl at a bar and says "I'd give you one!"
The girl turns to the guy and says, "I wouldn't sleep with you if you were the last man on Earth!"
The guy replies "I was giving you a rating out of 10"
Star ratings!
Maybe aliens haven't visited our solar system yet because we only have one star.
They probably prefer going to systems with a 4-5 star rating.
A documentary about the history of the computer desktop was recently given an R rating...
Turns out every icon was a little graphic.
A man rating trees
A man was rating his 3 Oak trees. Oak C was great, Oak B was even better, but the other was just okay.
A bunch of blokes are in a pub and a woman walks past.
1 bloke says to the rest of his mates "i would give her one"
The woman over hears this, turns around and says "I would not have s**... with you even if you were the last man on earth"
The bloke replies "who said anything about s**...? i was rating you out of 10"
When they didn't accept my discount, I gave my local tanning salon a low rating...
It seemed a little shady to me.
Why is Texas called the Lone Star State?
Because that's the highest rating it could get
Biden has a higher approval rating among female voters than Trump
However it was the Mail voters that won Biden the Election.
Aliens refuse to visit Earth because they've looked up our solar system...
and it has a 1-star rating.
Chinese Flag Rating
I'd give it uhhh 5 stars.
Want to hear a joke about the Dallas Cowboys?
The Dallas cowboys logo isnt a logo, its a rating
Courtesy of my 8yo son
What's the highest rating that cheese can get?
Grate.
What does George Lucas look for when rating a university's sports program?
He makes sure there are two D2 teams.

