Rates Jokes

Funniest Rates Short Jokes

Short rates jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The rates humour may include short rating jokes also.

1. In Jamaica, a slice of pie costs $3.50. In the Bahamas, a slice of pie costs $5.50. These are the pie rates of the caribbean.
2. I asked a girl to rate me out of 10 the other day She said "you're an 8 on a scale of 10"
   I still don't understand why she wanted me to urinate on a skeleton
3. 1 slice of apple pie will cost you $2.45 in Jamaica. A slice of apple pie costs $3.75 in Trinidad and the same slice costs $4.45 in Barbados. And those are the Pie-Rates of the Caribbean.
4. The Robinhood app has a rating of 4.7 stars in the app store. But current market conditions prevent us from allowing investors to add new star. You may only remove stars until conditions improve.
5. Did you know that you can get a slice of lemon pie in cuba for $1.50 and in jamaica you can get key lime pie for $1.00? Those are the pie rates of the carribean.
6. There Once Was A Poet Named Bates, His poems weren't always first rate,
   His first lines weren't bad, but the problem he had,
   Was that he always tried to put too many syllables into the last line.
7. Why does Japan have a low obesity rate and a low birth rate? They don't like Fat Man and Little Boy
8. TIL Texas is called the lone star state because it was the minimum allowed in a 5 star rating system
9. A slice of pie costs $3.50 in Barbados, $3.00 in Saint Lucia, $2.50 in Belize, and $2 in Cuba.
   Those are the pie rates of the Caribbean.
10. Movie Ratings Explained G: Nobody gets the girl.
    PG: The good guy gets the girl.
    R: The bad guy gets the girl.
    X: Everybody gets the girl!

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Rates One Liners

Which rates one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with rates? I can suggest the ones about price and rated.

1. Why did elon musk go broke? Because his car insurance rates were astronomical.
2. Why don't alien visit our solar system? Terrible ratings. One star.
3. Whats Saudi Arabia's highest rated sitcom? How I bought your mother
4. 3.14% of sailors are... π-rates.
5. Girl if I had to rate you, I'd give you a 10 Oh the pH scale, because girl you are basic.
6. String Fight My ex used to hit me with stringed instruments. If only I had known about her history of violin.
7. 3.14% of all sailors are Pi-rates! (Have a great pi-day)
8. I'm so dumb and out of shape My resting heart rate is higher than my IQ
9. I went online and rated our Solar System Gave it one star.
10. Why don't aliens visit Earth Bc we have 1 star rating...
11. Why were birth rates low in 1970? You can't get pregnant during '69.
12. Vladimir Putin's approval rate is 80%... The other 20% are missing.
13. If I had to rate the solar system I'd give it one star.
14. I just bought a movie with 3.142 stars out of 5 It was a pi rated DVD
15. How would you rate USA and Saudi Arabia's relationship? 9/11

Pie Rates Jokes

Here is a list of funny pie rates jokes and even better pie rates puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• A slice of pie is $2.50 in the Bahamas. A slice of pie is $ 3.00 in Jamaica.
  Those are the pie rates of the Caribbean.
• Why is it hard to work at an apple pie factory? They have such a high turnover rate.
• A chicken pie in Jamaica costs €2.00 A chicken pie in Trinidad costs €2.15 A chicken pie in St Kitts costs €2.40 These are the pie rates of the Caribbean.
• It's $2.50 for a pie in Jamaica, and $2.00 for a pie in the Bahamas.... The pie rates of the Caribbean.
• Price of pies Pies in the Bahamas cost $3.25
  Pies in Aruba cost $2.25
  Pies in the Cayman Islands
  cost $6.00
  These are the pie rates of the Caribbean.
• A pie in Barbados costs $3, meanwhile a pie in Haiti costs £5 These are the pie rates of the Caribbean
• An apple pie costs $2.50 in Jamaica. The same apple pie costs $3.00 in the Dominican Republic.
  These are the pie rates of the Carribean.
• A slice of apple pie is £2 in Jamaica, a slice of apple pie is £2.40 in the Bahamas and a slice of apple pie is £1.70 in Barbados. These are the pie rates of the Caribbean.
• A slice of apple pie is $2.50 in Jamaica and $3 in the Bahamas These are the pie rates of the Caribbean
• In Jamaica it costs £3 for a steak pie, in Trinidad it's £2.50 These are the pie rates of the Caribbean.

Interest Rates Jokes

Here is a list of funny interest rates jokes and even better interest rates puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I wish I could get lucky with banks as I am with women. Women always offer a 0% interest rate.
• Most people want to be bankers when they grow up But at this rate they are gonna lose interest
• I got rid of my house, cars and credit cards to get my interest rates lower.. It worked! Now girls are barely interested in me..
  (Heard it from somewhere on tv maybe)
• There's been some interesting science news today. Apparently materials with a half life of 3 pass through valves at a extremely slow rate.
  -plauge inc
• If they raise the interest rates one more time... ...You're going to see Janet Yellen.
• The interest rates for a loan in the carribean are... 3.14.
• What do you call a shark that sells dirt at high interest rates? A loam shark.
• My banker friend keeps talking about how attractive he is... He keeps talking about his high interest rates.
  This made my fiancee try to smother me with a pillow.
• Washington DC's IQ is the same as the Federal Reserves interest rate Theyre both negative.
• Why can't economist get laid? Cause they can't get global growth 3% and interest rates are low

Crime Rates Jokes

Here is a list of funny crime rates jokes and even better crime rates puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Why are crime rates down in the US? Because criminals keep turning themselves into police.
• I've heard the crime rate in the Philippines drops when Manny Pacquiao fights... The crime rate also drops in Floyd Mayweather's home when Floyd Mayweather fights.
• What part of Italy has the highest crime rate, The spaghetto
• Have you heard about the high crime rate of pixelated people It really needs a resolution
• How do you lower the crime rate? Give the criminals badges.
• What's the only thing that grows in Ferguson? The crime rate.
• Yoooo I'm high asf But not as high as the African American crime rate. Did you know that despite making up just 13% of the population-
• Crime rates are decreasing in my town. I found some money on the floor.
• What's the only thing that grows in Oakland? A: The Crime Rate!

Teacher Rates Jokes

Here is a list of funny teacher rates jokes and even better teacher rates puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Why is the teenage mexican pregnancy rate so high? Cuz the teachers said "go home and do your essays"
• My teacher asked me if I know the unit for rate of deformities in Hapsburgs..... I replied:"perhaps "

Amusing Rates Jokes to Make You Laugh with Friends

What funny jokes about rates you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean stats jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make rates pranks.