Rank Jokes

• Short Rank Jokes
• Rank One Liners
• Military Rank Jokes
• More Rank Jokes

Funniest Rank Short Jokes

Short rank jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The rank humour may include short rating jokes also.

1. Can someone please tell me what the lowest rank in the military is? Every time I ask someone they say it's private.
2. Why are people acting like Kamala Harris is the first woman to obtain such a high ranking position in the US Government? Have we all forgotten that Monica Lewinsky was directly under Bill Clinton?
3. I asked the Colonel what the lowest rank in the army was. He said, "It's Private."
   I said, "Come on, you can tell me."
4. I asked my veteran friend what the first ranking is in the military, but I couldn't get a straight answer. He just kept telling me it's private.
5. At the box office this weekend Predator took first place and The Nun took second. Coincidently, that's how the Catholic Church ranks it's priorities.
6. The phone rings, and Dad asks: What does the caller ID say? Mom: It's a private caller.
   Dad: Don't answer that. We only pick up for ranks Lieutenant Caller and higher.
7. Our local fish market ranks their catches on how rare they are I noticed today that they had rare salmon. It definitely isn't common plaice!
8. My home state of Nevada is ranked #50 in education Not the best but at least we're in the top 3
9. What's up with the american military? I keep asking them what's the lowest rank and they keep telling me it's private.
10. Top 10 most important sciences 10. It is
    9. impossible
    8. to rank
    7. the importance
    6. of science
    5. because
    4. all of them
    3. are equally
    2. important.
    1. Physics

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Rank One Liners

Which rank one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with rank? I can suggest the ones about score and rate.

1. How can you spot the rank of a Russian? By the stripes on his Adidas jumpsuit.
2. My friend asked why I wouldn't tell him my military rank. I told him it's Private.
3. What military rank do you hold while using a pay toilet? Lieutenant
4. Where does the Navy rank amongst the armed forces? Submarines.
5. What is the lowest and youngest rank of child-soldiers? Infantry
6. What's the highest rank in the popcorn army? Colonel
7. Who Has The Highest Rank in the Linux Military? The kernel.
8. How can you tell what rank a Russian soldier is? Count the stripes on his track pants.
9. Two low ranking soldiers were talking It was a private conversation
10. What do you call a man who invents "PageRank"? Larry Page ..go figure? (True Story)
11. What do you call a low rank crusader (or European idc)? A euroPEON
    Kill me pls
12. After the high ranking potato official was killed All flags were flown at half-mashed.
13. What rank are you in the bathroom? A loo-tenant
14. What's a low ranking south American country? Sargentina
15. I'm ranked 2nd in the world at coin flipping... It was a real toss up for 1st place 😉

Military Rank Jokes

Here is a list of funny military rank jokes and even better military rank puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I don't know why people are saying the Russian military is weak They're ranked #2 in Ukraine.
• Trump may have dodged the draft but he was still given honorary military ranks. Private Tax Return,
  Major Embarrassment,
  Chief Petty Officer,
  General Incompetence.
• A guy asks another guy about military ranks Guy 1: So remind me, what is the lowest rank in the army again?
  Guy 2: It's private
  Guy: Ok never mind
• If Bernie gets elected we should give him an honorary military rank. Colonel sounds right to me.
• These days, they expect those who join the military to go up in rank quickly. I think they're just generalizing.
• Did you hear about the high-ranking military father who cloned himself? The result was a Major faux Pa
• What do you call promoting a broom to the highest rank in the military? A Sweeping Generalization.
• I think Bernie would win for sure if he had served in the military and reached the rank of Colonel And he would be sure to get the black vote.
• I'm not really impressed with high ranking military officials, in General.
• A man in France was arrested today for using his car to run down a pedestrian he thought was o**... bin Laden. Even though it was a mistake, it still ranks as France's biggest military victory.

Comical Rank Jokes and Gems that Will Get You in Laughter Land

What funny jokes about rank you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean grade jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make rank pranks.