Ranger Jokes

97 ranger jokes and hilarious ranger puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about ranger that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Discover the funniest ranger jokes from the classic Lone Ranger to the modern day Power Ranger. Learn why Walker Texas Ranger always wins, why Ute Ranger always has a few tricks up his sleeve, and why Ford Ranger will never give up his beloved Wildlife! Don't forget about Ranger Rick and Ranger School!

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Funniest Ranger Short Jokes

Short ranger jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The ranger humour may include short rider jokes also.

  1. What did the power ranger say to his patient when he became a doctor? "It's morphine time"
  2. My nurse is obsessed with power rangers Each time she gives me pills she says "it's morphin' time"
  3. where did the lone ranger take his trash to? to the dump, to the dump, to the dump dump dump.
  4. The Power Rangers walk into a bar... The bartender says, "We don't serve your kind here."
    The Power Rangers say, "Why, because we're colored?!"
  5. They have announced a new Lone Ranger Movie. The Lone Ranger Goes To Canada
    or Onto Toronto Pronto Tonto.
  6. If Chippendales goes to a national park and rescues the park rangers.. Would the headline in the newspaper be Chippendales rescue rangers?
  7. Where does the Lone Ranger take his garbage? To the dump to the dump to the dump dump.dump, to the dump to the dump to the dump.dump dump...
  8. Where does the Lone Ranger take his garbage? To the dump, to the dump, to the dump-dump-dump!
  9. Describe your latest laid with a movie title! "The Lone Ranger"
    "Home Alone"
    "Bend It Like Beckham"
    Now it's your turn!
  10. Chuck Norris once gave a box of his old watches to a group of kids.
    These kids are now known as the power rangers.

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Ranger One Liners

Which ranger one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with ranger? I can suggest the ones about trooper and ringer.

  1. As a paramedic, I've learned that there is something you can never say with a straight face: I'm having a s**....
  2. Got too much pain from watching Power Rangers Guess it's morphine time...
  3. What did the Power Ranger say when he got to the Hospital? It's morphine time
  4. What did the doctor say to the terminally ill Power Ranger? It's morphine time!
  5. Batman, but it's a Japanese action film Mighty Orphan Power Ranger
  6. It's hard to make good Power Rangers jokes. Most of the time, they feel Super Megaforced.
  7. Did you hear about the cowboy who worked in a bank? He was the loan ranger.
  8. What does a power ranger say when hurt? It's morphine time
  9. What is it called when a space ranger dies? Unfortunaut
  10. What do you call a group of drug dealers with superpowers? The Powder Rangers.
  11. What did the drug addicted power rangers say to each other? It's morphine time!
  12. What does a power ranger say before they do drugs? It's morphine time!
  13. What did one washed up Power Ranger say to the other? It's Morphine Time!
  14. What do you call a contract driver riding a Ford ranger? A ute-Uber
  15. When Chuck Norris gets old and has to use a walker Will he name his walker, Texas ranger

Power Ranger Jokes

Here is a list of funny power ranger jokes and even better power ranger puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What did the old Power Ranger say every day at exactly 3:00 PM? It's Morphin(e) Time!
  • Which Super Sentai (Power Rangers) series is the least favorite among Puertoricans? Hurricanger
  • Why is Power Rangers a bad show? Because your opinions don't count.
  • What did the crackhead power ranger say to the other power ranger? It's mighty morphine time
  • What did the power ranger-turned-addict say? It's morphine time!
  • What is a Power Ranger's motto in the hospital? It's morphine time!
  • When does a Power Ranger go to hospital? When they're injured.... It's MORPHINE TIME
  • What does a Power Ranger call an STD An SPD
  • What did the Power Ranger say after becoming a j**...? Its Morphine time
  • The blue power ranger goes: "Blue power!" The red power ranger goes: "Red power!" The w**... ranger goes: "Non racist w**...!"

Lone Ranger Jokes

Here is a list of funny lone ranger jokes and even better lone ranger puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • The Lone Ranger woke to see his tent blown away by a tornado. He declared, "Tonto, we’re not in canvas anymore."
  • Do you remember that episode of The Lone Ranger where Tonto got Alzheimer's? Who's "me", kemosabe?
  • The Lone Ranger woke to see his tent blown away by a tornado. He declared, "Tonto, we’re not in canvas anymore."
  • The Lone Ranger woke to see his tent blown away by a tornado. He declared, "Tonto, we’re not in canvas anymore."
  • What did the Mexican doctor tell the Lone Ranger? Estas muriendo. Tu necesitas chemo. Sabe?
Ranger joke, What did the Mexican doctor tell the Lone Ranger?

Park Ranger Jokes

Here is a list of funny park ranger jokes and even better park ranger puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • A guy goes into the forest to have some quiet time but is immediately pulled away by a park ranger He wasn't a happy camper.
  • Yellowstone park rangers have discovered a Grizzly that only eats cheese... ... it's a Camembert.

Texas Ranger Jokes

Here is a list of funny texas ranger jokes and even better texas ranger puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Nudist resort in Texas Some creep slowly chipped a hole into the wall using an old spoon for some reason.
    The rangers are looking into it
  • Once, on the set of Walker Texas Ranger, a goat fell over dead.
    Chuck Norris ran up to the goat and beard rubbed it back to life.
  • "Walker Texas Ranger: The Movie 3-D" was considered by Warner Brothers; however the technology to create the visual effects will never be possible.
  • Chuck Norris is the only person that can deliver a roundhouse kick in full 1080p, remember that the next time you watch Walker Texas Ranger in Blu-Ray.
  • In an official mandate, 'Walker, Texas Ranger' DVD discs have been ordered to replace the armor plating in all bulletproof vests.
  • Walker Texas Ranger was actually a reality show.
  • Even after muting "Walker, Texas Ranger", you can still hear Chuck Norris's victims screaming after getting roundhouse kicked.
  • They once had a showing of Walker Texas Ranger in 3D.
    There where no survivors.
  • Walker Texas Ranger wasn't an action crime drama, it was a documentary.
  • Chuck never auditioned for Walker Texas Ranger, a camera crew turned up at his house and secretly filmed him.
Ranger joke

Hilarious Fun Ranger Jokes to Bring Joy & Laughter with Friends

What funny jokes about ranger you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean scout jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make ranger pranks.

So the lone ranger and Tonto are being chased by the bad guys...

To see if they're being closed in on Tonto puts his ear to the ground to listen for the sound of horse hooves.
"Kimosabe, no soldiers chasing us, buffalo come."
"How do you know that?"
"Ear sticky."

Tonto and the Lone Ranger

Chased by i**..., the lone ranger and Tonto are galloping along when suddenly, Tonto stops, jumps down off his horse, puts his ear to the ground and listens. After a bit, he sits up and says 'BUFFALO COME!'
'how can you tell?' replies the lone ranger.
Tonto says 'Ear Sticky!'

Czech and a Mexican

A Czechoslovakian and a Mexican go camping, while they were in the woods the Czech gets eaten by a bear. So the Mexican runs to find the park ranger and says "park ranger a bear ate my friend"
The park ranger and the Mexican find two bears, a male and a female. The park ranger asked the Mexican which ate his friend he points to the male and the ranger kills him and guts him there are no remains of the Czech man in the bear. Moral of the story never trust a Mexican when he says the Check is in the male

The Lone Ranger is in trouble now!

The lone ranger and Tonto are riding together, when suddenly they are surrounded by a group of Apache Indians, screaming like banshees and swinging warclubs.
The lone ranger takes a look at the war-painted pack of warriors howling for his blood, and yells to his faithful sidekick, "Looks like we might have to fight them off, Tonto!"
The lone ranger looks over his shoulder to see Tonto backing his horse away slowly.
"What you mean 'we', white man?"

The Long Ranger and Tonto are hunting for buffalo

The Long Ranger and Tonto are riding the plains, hunting buffalo. Tonto stops suddenly, jumps down from his horse, and puts his ear the the ground.
Tonto exclaims, "Buffalo come!"
The Long Rangers says "Wow, how do you know?"
Tonto replies, "Ear sticky."

Tonto and the Lone Ranger are walking up a mountain...

When all of a sudden they see a beautiful blonde coming down the mountain by horseback.
Tonto goes up to the woman and says, "Some"
The Lone Ranger looks at Tonto and says, "Tonto you idiot you're an Indian you are supposed to say HOW not SOME!!!"
Tonto Looks back at the Lone Ranger points at the woman and says, "No me know HOW, me want SOME."

The Lone Ranger..

and Tonto were riding when all of a sudden they were surrounded by Indians. That was when Tonto informed the Lone Ranger that he was tired of being his sidekick and sold him out. Once in captivity the Lone Ranger was given one last request from the Indian chief. He requested to speak to his horse, Silver. He whispered into the horses ear and it took off, later returning with a beautiful n**... woman, the Lone Ranger proceed to have s**... with her. The Indian chief was very impressed with the feat he had just witnessed but was still going to kill him. The Lone Ranger asked to speak to his horse one more time and the chief obliged. The horse walked over and the Lone Ranger went to his ear and said " POSSE, YOU IDIOT I SAID POSSE!!"

Who is the k**...'s favorite children's character ?

The White-Power Ranger
I came up with this after reading a cracked article.



Who was h**...'s childhood hero?

the w**... ranger

The Lone Ranger and Tonto

The Lone Ranger and Tonto stop in their persuit of some crooks to check for tracks. Tonto presses his ear to the ground, sits up slowly and says thoughtfully "Hmmmm...buffalo come".
Amazed the Lone Ranger asks "Wow! How did you know that?!"
Tonto replies "Ear stick to ground"

The Lone Ranger

The Lone Ranger and Tonto were riding across the prairie. Then Tonto got down from his horse and put his ear to the ground. He looked at the Lone Ranger and said, "Buffalo come."
The Lone Ranger looked at him and said, "Wow, that's amazing! How did you figure that out?"
Tonto looked at the Lone Ranger and said, "Ear sticky!"

Who is a k**... members favorite superhero?

The w**... Ranger

The lone Ranger and Tonto

The lone Ranger and Tonto are riding their horses when Tonto falls off. He lands in a ditch. The lone Ranger walks up and says "Tonto are you ok"? Tonto puts his ear to the ground and remains quiet. The lone Ranger repeats himself and Tonto quiets him and says "buffalo come" the lone Ranger says " you can tell that by listening to the ground"? Tonto says "no, ground very sticky.

What do you call a white supremacist who fights aliens at night?

A w**... ranger

Lone Ranger and Tonto are riding across the plains

When Tonto stops suddenly, climbs down, and puts his ear to the ground.
Lone Ranger waits a few minutes, then asks Tonto, "What is it?"
Tonto said, "Buffalo come."
Lone Ranger asks, "How can you tell?"
Tonto replied, "Ear sticky."

The new Power Rangers movie shocked a lot of people by having the Blue Power Ranger be autistic...

Everyone thought it'd be the w**... Ranger

What did the ranger tell Smokey when the National Forest Service was de-funded?

I can bear-ly handle all these fires alone.

What's s**... Doo's favorite Netflix show?

Ranger Rings.

What did the white nationalist dress up as for Halloween?

The w**... Ranger

A man is caught feasting on a Bald Eagle by a park ranger.

He is taken to court and the judge asks him why he committed this crime.
The man replies I had no other choice and this was my only way of survival.
Given the circumstances, the judge decides that this man is telling the truth and let's him off the case. But being curious, the judge asks Well, how did it taste like?
The man replied Have you ever had Spotted Owl?

The Lone Ranger and Tonto were riding through the prairie

When all of a sudden Tonto stops and puts his ear to the ground. The Lone Ranger says, "What are you doing Tonto?" Tonto says, Keemosabi, buffalo come!" The Lone Ranger then says, "How can you tell?" Tonto replies, Ear sticky."

The Lobe Ranger and Tonto are riding in the desert

When they come to a high hill they can see that they are surrounded by wild indians on all sides.
The Lone Ranger says This doesn't look good my friend, they look fierce and out for blood. What should we do?
Tonto reply's What do you mean we white man?

The Lone Ranger and Tonto are on a ridge

And the lone ranger says: "Tonto! There's Indians to the North! And Indians to the West, Indians to the East and Indians to the South! What are we going to do?"
And Tonto goes: "What do you mean we, white man?"

Got a new job at Gatwick Airport. I patrol the runways on a horse and shoot down any i**... flying devices in the area.

I'll be known as The Drone Ranger.

Tonto and The Lone Ranger we're riding their horses next to some train tracks..

They stop and hop off their horses. Tonto puts his ear onto the tracks and tells The Lone Ranger Buffalo come . The Lone Ranger says how do you know? . Tonto says my ear is stuck .

In his later years, the Lone Ranger and Tonto were catching up on old times. After awhile the Lone Ranger paused and said I have some sad news.

Tell me, old friend said the faithful Tonto.
Well...I recently was diagnosed with Cancer
Bad spirits, replied his old companion.
The Lone Ranger look off into the distance for a minute. After all your years of wisdom, what do you think I should do?
Chemo, sabe
Ps this is my first joke post ever so I hope I did it right.

A woman goes fishing...

Just as she's about to get on the boat, the park ranger comes to her and says: "Ma'am, fishing is prohibited here. I'm gonna have to fine you."
And she responds: "But I haven't even started fishing yet."
To which he responds: "But you have the tools, right?"
So she says: "Ok then. If you fine me, then I will accuse you of r**...."
Suddenly bewildered, the ranger says: "But I didn't even touch you."
To which she responds: "But you have the tools, right?"

The Lone Ranger stops for a drink

The Lone Ranger and Tonto ride into town one hot, summer day. The Lone Ranger's horse is looking overheated so the Lone Ranger tells Tonto to run around in circles fanning the horse off.
Sometime later a cowboy walks into the saloon and asks "Who's horse is that out there with the silver saddle?"
"That would be me," says the Lone Ranger. "Well you left your i**... running."

A Canadian park ranger is giving some ramblers a warning about bears,

Brown bears are usually harmless. They avoid contact with humans so we suggest you attach small bells to your rucksacks and give the bears time to get out of your way. However, grizzly bears are extremely dangerous. If you see any grizzly-bear droppings leave the area immediately.
So how do we know if they're grizzly bear droppings? asks one of the ramblers.
It's easy, replies the ranger. They're full of small bells.

Smoky Bear: Only YOU can prevent wildfires!

Two guys are talking about TV commercials. One of them says, So, I saw this commercial the other day where a bear dressed as park ranger said that only I could prevent wildfires.
The other guy replies, Why, that two-timing liar! The other day he told me that _I_ was the only one who could prevent them!

In a national park, a woman stopped to watch a deer.

A man walked over to her and said, "This is red deer, Cervus elaphus, it's pleased to meet you."
Then she watched him continue to other visitors and say the same thing.
She catches up with him and asks, "Why are you doing this?"
The man responds, "The ranger told me this species hadn't been introduced here."

Ranger joke, In a national park, a woman stopped to watch a deer.

jokes about ranger