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Raisin Jokes

114 raisin jokes and hilarious raisin puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about raisin that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Looking for some laughs? Check out our collection of raisin jokes! Whether you're looking for a pun or just a silly joke, we've got you covered.

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Funniest Raisin Short Jokes

Short raisin jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The raisin humour may include short raspberry jokes also.

  1. My buddy just got a job in marketing with Kellogg's cereals... I guess you could say his job is Raisin Bran awareness.
  2. This year I'm on a crusade to tell everyone about the benefits of eating dried grapes It's about raisin awareness
  3. Twice a year there is a newsletter released about dried fruit. On those dates it is raisin awareness of currant events.
  4. So a guy asks me why I've been letting my grape dry out... and so I told him "I have my raisins."
  5. Trail mix dad joke I made a playlist of songs from Eminem, The Cranberries, California Raisins, Red Hot chili Peppers, Spice Girls, and the Peanuts.
    I call it my Trail Mix.
  6. I tried to convince the grape that she had dried out... But I just couldn't raisin with her.
    I'll see myself out.
  7. I'm not exactly sure why my friend likes dried grapes so much... ... but I'm sure he has his raisins.
  8. I was telling my children about the health benefits of eating dried fruits recently It's really all about raisin awareness.
  9. I've been telling people about the advantages of eating dry grapes. It's all about raisin awareness.
  10. My friend travels from town to town giving seminars on the health benefits of eating dried grapes. He is just out there, raisin awareness.

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Raisin One Liners

Which raisin one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with raisin? I can suggest the ones about currant and grape.

  1. Why did the woman divorce the grape? She was tired of raisin' kids.
  2. If you leave a grape out in the sun, it'll shrivel and dry up... Just raisin awareness
  3. How to stop being intimidated by dates Just think of them as big raisins.
  4. What does Hodor start off his day with? Raisin' Bran.
  5. Why did grape prices go up? There was a raisin demand.
  6. What is Hodor's favorite cereal? Raisin Bran.
  7. I used to work as a programmer for autocorrect... ...but they fried me for no raisin.
  8. How did Eddard Stark get his daily recommended amount of fiber? Raisin' Bran.
  9. What's an Amish person's favourite type of raisin? barn raisin'
  10. Why did Mr. Grape leave Mrs. Grape? He was tired of raisin kids.
  11. Did you hear about the price of grapes? There raisin.
  12. Why did the grape cross the road? No raisin.
  13. Grapes are so predictable at poker Eventually, they all end up raisin
  14. I'm telling everyone about eating dried grapes… It's about raisin awareness
  15. I just love rehydrated raisins They're grape.

Raisin Bran Jokes

Here is a list of funny raisin bran jokes and even better raisin bran puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What's Ned Stark's favorite cereal? Raisin Bran
  • What's Hodor's job? Raisin Bran
  • Why did House Stark shut down the northernmost cereal factory in the Seven Kingdoms? Cuz they were bad at Raisin' Bran
  • What does Kellogg's have in common with Ned and Catelyn Stark? They're both responsible for Raisin' Bran.
  • If Bran dies and a white walker brings him back... Is he Raisin Bran?
  • What was Maester Luwin's favorite cereal? Raisin Bran
  • What do you get when you dry out a Stark? Raisin Bran
  • What do you call a bunch of black kids playing in leaves? Raisin bran
  • So I was trying to convince my friend to try Raisin Bran cereal He told me there were flaws in my raisining
  • What is the first step to make Raisin Bran? Raisin' Bran

Raisin Bread Jokes

Here is a list of funny raisin bread jokes and even better raisin bread puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What do pimentos, raisins, and people from Arkansas have in common? When you find one, it's usually in bread
  • When the two loaves of bread got married, the grooms speech was a standout. He was raisin' toast.
  • What is the fastest bread? Raisin Toast
  • What do you call Bread with Flys in it? Raisin Bread
  • What kind of bread helps you fly? Raisin' bread.
Raisin joke, What kind of bread helps you fly?

Here is a list of funny oatmeal raisin cookie jokes and even better oatmeal raisin cookie puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I only eat certain types of oatmeal cookies because raisins.
  • Why are oatmeal cookies better? No raisin
  • Oatmeal raisin cookies are the child molesters of the cookies world, they should have to let everyone within a 2 mile radius who they really are.
Raisin joke, Oatmeal raisin cookies are the child molesters of the cookies world,

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about raisin can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of raisin puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Hilarious Raisin Jokes for a Fun-Filled Night with Friends

What funny jokes about raisin you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean rinse jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make raisin prank.

Whats an amish person's favorite kind of raisin?

A barn raisin.

I'm gonna start telling people the benefits of eating dried grapes.

It's all about "raisin" awareness

Raisin Bread

A baker hires a young female assistant who likes to wear very short skirts and a thong. One day a young man enters the store, glances at the assistant and then at the loaves of bread behind the counter. Noticing the length of her skirt and the location of the raisin bread, he has a brilliant idea. "I'd like some raisin bread please," the man says politely. The girl nods and climbs up a ladder to reach the raisin bread, which is located on the very top shelf. The young man, standing almost directly beneath her, gets an excellent view just as he planned. Once she comes down he says he should get two loaves, as he is having company for dinner. As the girl retrieves the second loaf of bread, one of the other male customers notices what is going on. Thinking quickly, he requests his own loaf of raisin bread so he can continue to enjoy the view. With each trip up the ladder, the young lady seems to catch the eye of another male customer. Pretty soon, each male customer is asking for raisin bread, just to see her climb up and down. After many trips she is tired, irritated and thinking that she is really going to have to try the bread herself. Finally, once again atop the ladder, she stops and fumes, glaring at the men standing below. She notices an elderly man standing amongst the crowd, staring up at her. Thinking to save herself a trip, she yells at the elderly man: "Is it raisin for you, too?" "No," stammers the old man: "but it's quivering a bit!"

What did the grape say when she let her kids play in the sun to long?

I hate raisin kids!

I Enjoyed Your Joke, soue13, I've Also Come Up With One. At Age 25..

Did you guys hear about the dried grape at the party last night?
He was really RAISIN the roof!

How did the man drown in a bowl of muesli?

A strong raisin pulled him under.
(source: my mother, who never could remember jokes)

I asked a grape about parenthood

But it didn't know much about baby raisin.

Do you like raisin cookies?..

Then why don't you adopt one?!

Why are grapes so fun to go clubbing with?

Because they're always raisin the roof.

Would you like to hear a joke about dried grapes?

It's not that good, don't go raisin your expectations.

What is a zombie's favorite cereal?

Raisin brain.

What did the religious pear say to the grape that lost his wife?

"Everything happens for a raisin"

What did the grapes say to their parents after they put them into a nursing home?

Thanks for raisin us

I've got 40 raisins in my savings account

...oh no wait, that's my currant account.

What do you call a fly without wings?

A walk.
What do you call that same fly without legs?
A raisin.

Did you hear about the raisin that slept with another raisin's wife?

No? You're obviously not up to date with currant affairs.

Why did the raisin go to the police?

Because, he was a grape victim.

"Raising a family is hard," he said.

"Not if they're buried close enough together," replied the Necromancer.

I just heard a dried up grape won the lottery, got a supermodel girlfriend and won a brand new car.

I guess everything happens for a raisin.

My purpose in life is to pay back those grapes I owe.

It's my raisin debt.

Why did the raisin go to jail

Someone called grape.

I was reared by a grape.

It was tough at first, but once it shriveled up, it was a breeze raisin me.

Raising your hand is the worst way for voting

Hands Down

President Trump to sign an executive action taking aim at Sun Maid and California's Raisin industry

He answered most of the criticism over the weekend by stating
"I would like to make raisins Grape again"

I can no longer justify the cookies price from local bakery

Because he keeps raisin it up

What do you call a fly without wings?

A raisin!

What question does employee grape ask of employer grape?

"Can I get me a raisin?"

TIL that grapes can kill dogs

I'm just raisin awareness

No way Jose! Another? I can Harvey believe it. Irma find somewhere safer to live.

The local chicken shack changed its name in honor of the occasion. They're now Raisin HurriCanes.

What happens when you rehydrate a raisin before it's ready?

Statutory Grape.

Raising children is hard as a trans parent

They see right through me

Two young boys went to a bread store...

Two young boys went to a bread store. One boy asks the pretty clerk if he could get some raisin bread, she climbs up a ladder to grab the boy a loaf of raisin bread. While she's up on the ladder, the boy notices that the clerk wasn't wearing underwear. The boy whispers and points this out to the other boy. While up on the ladder the clerk asks the other boy if his is raisin too. To which he says, No Ma'am, mine's just quivering.

What did the raisin say to the grape?

Is it just me, or is it cold in here?

What is the meaning of life for a debt collector who hunts grape farmers?

Raisin debt

Jesus must be grape...

Cause now he's a raisin.

I'm trying to bring more attention to fried grapes

I'm raisin awareness.

I was reading an article about the health benefits of eating dehydrated grapes.

It was just raisin awareness.

What did the bottle of wine say to the grape?

It was great raisin you.

Why do grapes make great parents?

Because they're always *raisin* the kids.

A dying man smells his favorite oatmeal raisin cookies cooking downstairs.

It takes all the strength he has left but he gets up from the bed and crawls down the stairs.
He sees the cookies cooling on the counter and staggers over to them. As he reaches for one, his wife's wrinkled hand reaches out, smacks his and she yells:
No, you can't have those! They're for the f**...!

What song grapes like the most?

Raisin, my family...

Why was the raisin in jail?

He was a Grapist

A grape falls off a vine and dries...

Everything happens for a raisin.

How do you make sure that your grape ages well?

You need to be raisin it right!

Raising a family is hard.

It's a lot easier if you're a necromancer and they're buried close together.

A man goes to a restaurant

And notices that there's a fly in his soup. He flags down a waiter and exclaims excuse me sir, there's a fly in my soup!
The waiter looks and responds well I'll be d**..., the chef said he ran out making raisin bread!

Raising my fist to the sky, I roared, "It's not how many times you fall down, it's how many times you get back up!"

"Sir, that's not how field sobriety tests work." the cop replied.

How are raisins made

grapes eat two popeyes biscuits no drink

I firmly disagree with putting fruit in cake

There's just no good raisin for it

I've started to spread the word about the benefits of dried grapes

I'm just raisin awareness

A gorgeous young woman works at the grocery store. Her job is to climb the ladder to get raisin bread down from the top shelf.

Because she is so attractive, a lot of men who come to the grocery store ask her to get down the raisin bread just so they can see up her skirt when she climbs the ladder, but the woman thinks it's just because raisin bread is really popular.
One day, after the woman had given raisin bread to dozens of men, an old man came walking through the bread aisle. "Excuse me, sir," she said. "Is yours raisin too?"
"No," replied the old man, "but it's twitchin' a little!"

Need dad jokes for a date tomorrow

The date is the only one that would talk to me after I blew it with the raisin and the cranberry
But all jokes not aside, I'm seeing a girl tomorrow and need your groaniest/growniest dad-jokes

raising a child

A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. "My wife and I really got into it last night. She's disgusted about the way I raised my daughter," the guy says. "Especially as I only had a pair of sevens."

Raising dogs

A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. "I'm thinking about taking up raising dogs," the guy tells the bartender. "Great idea," the bartender replies. "I can give you a few pointers."

Raisin joke, I've been telling people about the advantages of eating dry grapes.

jokes about raisin

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these raisin jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.