Rainy Day Jokes
47 rainy day jokes and hilarious rainy day puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about rainy day that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Rainy Day Short Jokes
Short rainy day jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The rainy day humour may include short raining day jokes also.
- It was a rainy day, she had just left him and was walking back home... "Nobody will find him there"
She thought as she walked. - I'm so poor my only funds are daylight savings... but at least it's trickling down for a rainy day.
- A mathematician walks into a bar on a rainy April day... The bartender asks him, "Hey, do you know what April showers bring?"
The mathematician says, "Pilgrims!" - During rainy days, I and my lazy dog are competing who sleeps the deepest and the longest. I am the underdog in this fight.
- Every day, for the last two years, I've been putting something aside for a rainy day... ... But what am I going to do with 500 umbrellas and 200 pairs of wellies?
- I still have some faith in humanity and I owe it to the kind people who leave free unbrellas at public places on rainy days. Just when you need them the most.
- I heard that after Hurricane Irma, FEMA will run out of money. This is surprising since I thought they would have a rainy day fund.
- On a rainy day every one was enjoying the rain but only PETA wasn't Because it was pouring cats & dogs
- I just bought a brand new umbrella, but I'm not gonna use it yet. I'm saving it for a rainy day.
- On my recent trip to Japan, I visited Hiroshima on a short trip. It was a cold, dark, and rainy day. It wasn't the best day to be in Hiroshima, but it wasn't the worst, either.
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Rainy Day One Liners
Which rainy day one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with rainy day? I can suggest the ones about rainy and raining sky.
- Why do kangaroos hate rainy days? Because the kids have to play inside.
- Why can't you tan on a rainy day? Cos it's a sin
- What's wet and likes to shake? An earthquake on a rainy day.
- What do books wear on a rainy day? Rain Quotes
- I bought myself a new umbrella Saving it for a rainy day..
- On a rainy day, a girl was thinking about... The game.
(Sorry... i lost the game) - What do you call your mother on a rainy day? Mom.
- What is Al Shabaab's theme song? Rainy Day Women #12 & 35.
- I've put something aside for a rainy day. It's an umbrella.
- You're more beautiful than the day I met you. To be fair it was rainy and overcast.
- What day is it when you get a sunburned knee? A rainy day.
- Today i saw a girl with makeup in a rainy day and i get scared after rain
- It was a rainy day in California...
- What's worse than rainy days? Getting r**... by a giant scorpion.
Uproarious Rainy Day Jokes to Share with Friends
What funny jokes about rainy day you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean rain coat jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make rainy day pranks.
I told my wife when I first met her that I play a LOT of golf
I told her …
If it's a beautiful sunny day I'm gonna play golf
If it's windy I'll play golf
If it's rainy I'll play golf
If we're in a minor car accident, I'll drop her off at the hospital and go play golf…
She said she's a hooker…
I said you're probably not holding the club right!
My neighbour always seems to hang up his laundry on sunny days, but never on rainy days.
One day I decided to ask him how he always knew which days to hang his laundry.
"Well," he explained, "if I wake up and my wife is lying on her side, I know it's going to rain and I shouldn't hang my laundry. If I wake up and she's lying on her front, I know it's not going to rain and I should hang my laundry."
"That's a very interesting method," I replied, "but what if she's lying on her back?"
"Ah, those days," he said, "I have better things to do than laundry!"
Kids these days...
It was a very rainy day and the new kindergarten teacher was helping her children wear their galoshes. It was a tiresome job involving much pushing and shoving.
Finally it was young Barry's turn. The teacher pushed and pushed and finally helped him into his galoshes.
"You know," said Barry, "These aren't my galoshes."
The poor teacher groaned and struggled to pull his galoshes off. When she finally did, she said, "Alright Barry, now whose galoshes are these?"
"They're my brother's, but mum said I could wear them anyway."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I gave my girlfriend a laminated n**... photo of myself.
I told her to save it for a rainy day.
On a rainy day two men are standing under the poplar trees in the park
One of them is weeping:
- John. Do you know how difficult it is to lose a wife?
- I know Jack, I know. Practically impossible.
A group of wives go on a bus trip
A group of wives go on a bus trip.
It was a rainy day. So, while driving over a bridge, the driver lost control over the bus and the bus fell into the river.
All women died in the accident.
The next day, their husbands came to the bridge to mourn for their dead wives.
After a few hours, all men but one left.
Another man, who was puzzled about thios man's behaviour, came back a couple hours later to ask the man why he was still mourning.
He replied: "It's not like that... it's just... my wife... she missed the bus!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My Drink With My Girl Friends and Rainy Night:
The day starts with rain, and whole the day i have not seen even a single train. At night she come to me o yeaah! She holds a v**... Bottle. Asked me for enjoying the full night with continuously sips of packs. I opened the bottle take a pack, she watched. Again i make a pack and take it. She looked at me and waiting for her pack. Again i make a pack and take it. She stands up. I request her to set down. Again i make a pack and take it. She stands and went off. Again I make a Pack and Tack it :D
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My favorite bee joke
A bee is flying around on a rainy day, sad because the sun isn't out, when he sees another bee. They stop and talk to each other, the bee says this s**.... His friend replies you have to go down the street and check out this synagogue I was just at. There is a bar mitzvah going on right now. What's a bar mitzvah? It's a celebration, it's indoors and they have so many flowers all over the room, it's wonderful. That sounds great, says the bee I have just one more question. Yes? What is that thing on your head? This thing, it's called a Yakama. Why are you wearing it? I didn't want the people at the synagogue to think I was a wasp.
My boss has some winners, but I always get a chuckle from this one. (Pretty Long)
A man and his dog walk into a bar, the man sits down, and his dog follows in suit. The bartender asks, "What can I get you?" The man orders a shot of whiskey and drinks it as soon as the glass hits the bar. "That'll be $3.50." the bartender says promptly. "What if I told you that my dog is able to talk? Would you let me drink for free?" The bartender quickly rebuts. "A talking dog? Sure, why not" So the man looks to his dog and asks Ol' Scruffy; "Scruffy! Tell this barkeep what keeps this bar dry during rainy days" "Ruff!" the dog says. The bartender, now frustrated, says "Ok Pal, Where's my $3.50?" The man waves him off and explains that Scruffy is merely jesting and orders another shot, which the bartender pours and watches the shot disappear. "Ok Scruffy, who is the greatest baseball player that has ever played the game?" "Ruff!" The dog replies with a wagging tail. The bartender now gets fed up with the man and his "talking" dog and throws them to the street. The man gets up, wipes his face and looks to Scruffy. Scruffy looks up and says "Well, I guess I should have said Joe DiMaggio"
