Railway Tracks Jokes
11 railway tracks jokes and hilarious railway tracks puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about railway tracks that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Railway Tracks Short Jokes
Short railway tracks jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The railway tracks humour may include short railroad tracks jokes also.
- i have been chasing a criminal who murders at railway stations i think i am on the right track
- How is standing on a railway track like playing music? Most likely neither will get you a successful career.
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Hilarious Railway Tracks Jokes to Make Your Friends Roar with Laughter
What funny jokes about railway tracks you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean railroad train jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make railway tracks pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A guy goes to the pub...
A guy goes to the pub, and says to his friend, "You won't believe what happened! I was taking a shortcut along the railway track, and I found a girl tied to the rails. I untied her, and we had s**... over and over again. All the positions; everything!"
His friend replies, "Wow, that's great! I bet she's a beauty, right?"
"I don't know. I never found her head."
My dad gave up his job of being a late night radio DJ.
He took up a new job as a railway construction worker. Talk about a career change, but I guess he just couldn't give up his love for laying tracks.
The famous joke from eastern europe. Depicting a stereotypic slooow estonian character.
An Estonian stands by a railway track.
Another Estonian passes by on a handcar, pushing the pump up and down.
The first one asks: Is it a long way to Tallinn?
Not too long.
He gets on the car and joins pushing the pump up and down.
After two hours of silent pumping the first Estonian asks again: Is it a long way still to Tallinn?
Now, it is very long way to Tallinn.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Railway Rescue
The other day I rescued a woman who was tied to a railway track. After I untied her we made love. We tried everything except o**... 'cause i couldn't find her head.
10 pins were crossing a railway track. Suddenly they saw a train approaching them. 9 pins were able to cross. But the 10th pin couldn't make it and the train went over it. But nothing happened to that pin. Why?
Because it was a safety pin!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An ugly bloke walks into a pub with a huge grin on his face.
"What are you so happy about ?" asks the landlord.
"Well, I live by the railway and on my way home last night I noticed a woman tied to the tracks. I cut her free and we shagged all night !"
"Did you get a b**... ?" asks the landlord.
"No ..." he says, "I never found the head."
Santa, standing on a railway platform, suddenly runs and stands on the tracks.
Banta: "Santa, move out of the way! The train is arriving!"
Santa: "Haven't you heard the announcement that the train is arriving on the platform?"
Santa, standing on a railway platform, suddenly runs and stands on the tracks.
Banta: "Santa, move out of the way! The train is arriving!"
Santa: "Haven't you heard the announcement that the train is arriving on the platform?"
Old Russian joke from Soviet times
Lenin, Stalin, Khrushchev and Brezhnev are all travelling together in a railway carriage. Unexpectedly, the train stops.
Lenin suggests: "Perhaps we should announce a subbotnik (volunteer work-program), so that workers and peasants will fix the problem."
Stalin puts his head out of the window and shouts, "If the train does not start moving, the driver will be shot!"
Khrushchev then chimes in, "Let's take the rails from behind the train and use them to lay the tracks in front".
Then Brezhnev says, "Comrades, Comrades, let's draw the curtains, turn on the gramophone and pretend we're moving!"