The Best 68 Rage Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Rage jokes. There are some rage irate jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these rage rampage puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 of the Funniest Rage Jokes and Puns
Second Opinion
A doctor and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast table. Husband gets up in a rage and says, "And you are no good in bed either," and storms out of the house. After sometime he realizes he was nasty and decides to make amends and calls home.
She comes to the phone after many rings and the irritated husband says, "What took you so long to answer the phone?"
She says, "I was in bed."
"In bed this early, doing what?" Shouts the doctor.
"Getting a second opinion!"
A Jewish Atheist enrolls his son in Catholic school
A Jewish atheist hears that the best school in town happens to be Catholic, so he enrolls his son. Things are going well until one day the boy comes home and says, I just learned all about the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost.
The boy's father is barely able to control his rage. He grabs his son by the shoulders and says, Son, this is very important, so listen carefully. There is only ONE God — and we don't believe in Him!
What game is all the rage with the Ferguson rioters?
Truth or Darren Wilson.
I'm thinking about trying steroids...
I hear they're all the rage!
My wife and I got into a heated argument.
"I met a man...but I married a boy." she said, her face full of rage.
I said, "I guess the jokes on you then, paedo."
Imagine if, in some fit of drug-induced rage back in the 60s, Keith Richards had killed David Crosby & Gram Parsons?
Talk about killing two byrds with one stone.
Wife arrives home late at night from a business trip and quietly opens the door to her bedroom.
Wife arrives home late at night from a business trip and quietly opens the door to her bedroom. But she notices four legs instead of two peeking from under the blanket!
Seized by a fit of rage, she reaches for the baseball bat and starts hitting the blanket until the screaming stops.
Still in shock, she lurches to the kitchen to have a drink. As she enters, she sees her husband there, reading a magazine.
"Oh welcome home darling," he says, "my parents came for a visit, so I let them have our bedroom. I hope you said hello."
Apoplexy...
it's all the rage.
A father caught his teenage son filming a lewd act on his cell phone with his girlfriend. He was outraged, having thought that he had raised his son to be better than this.
In his rage, he shouted, "Son! I never, ever want to see you film vertically ever again!"
A daughter is in a fierce argument with her father
The dad is yelling, she's inconsolable and crying. She finally gets sick and tired of it, and storms up to her bedroom.
Before entering, she lashes out at her father "Oh, and more thing: Jim Morrison is a terrible artist!"
The father, filled with rage yells back "Young lady, there will be NO slamming of The Doors in this house!"
There is a trend in psychotherapy called Anger Expression therapy where the patient is to express any anger immediately no matter how small or trivial.
Its all the rage.
You can explore rage bitterly reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean rage incandescent dad jokes. There are also rage puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
What do you get when an alternative metal band runs out of toilet paper?
Rage Upon the Latrine
Whats large, hairy and full of rage?
My wife when she forgets her morning coffee!
What do you call the road rage that Tesla owners feel towards normal drivers?
Madagascar
Exit signs are all the rage these days
But I think they're on the way out
It's double standards!!!!
When The Hulk goes off into a vicious rage and destroys everything, he's "Incredible."
But when I do it,
I'm, "an alcoholic."
Did you hear about the Angry Lightbulb?
He was incandescent with rage.
My teenage daughter came home in a rage.
"I've just had sex education in school today, Dad!
You lied to me!
You told me if I have sex before my sixteenth birthday my boyfriend will die!"
I put down my paper: "Oh, he will sweetheart, he will.
A pirate walks into a bar...
...and requests a grog of ale.
"Sure thing pal," says the bartender. But he sees the pirate has his ship's wheel stuck in his pants. "Mr. Pirate," he says, "you do realize your wheel is in your pants?"
The pirate looks at the bartender with a fury-induced bloodshot eye that held years of rage. "Aye...it's driving me *nuts*!"
Alt right alt right alt right...
I keep getting older and they keep having the same rage.
I was hanging out with my grandfather.
I was on my phone when he knocks it out of my hands and said " You rely to much on technology " red in the face with rage I scream " No YOU rely to much on technology" as I pull the plug on his life support.
A husband was driving a car with his wife in the passenger seat
Resulting from road rage, a nearby car driver shouted at the husband, "You're a stupid idiot"
The wife then replied, "Do you know this person?"
The husband said, "No, why?"
The wife said, "Because he seems to know so much about you."
your mothers so fat
Rage against the machine got their name from her standing on a scale.
Boom, drop keyboard.
"You wouldn't like me when I'm angry... Because I always back up my rage with facts and well documented sources"
-The Credible Hulk
There was a very angry bodybuilder psychologist
He had Freud rage
My parents decided to have a Nirvana-Themed wedding
Then again, shotgun weddings were all the rage back then.
Disclaimer: 8371 days is long enough.
I was at a wedding where the bride didn't show up.
The groom was filled with unbrideled rage.
I just finished a book about the berserkers...
apparently they used to be all the rage.
What sport is all the rage in the anti vaxxer community?
Water polio.
Three friends: Nobody,Somebody and Mad used to live happily together
Once, Nobody and Somebody had a huge argument and in a fit of rage Somebody killed Nobody .
Horrified, Mad decided to call the cops.
Mad: Hello cops? Somebody just murdered Nobody! You need to come over quick!
Cop: What?
Mad: Somebody killed Nobody!
Cop: Sir, are you mad?
Mad: Yes sir! How did you know that?
Jealous girlfriend
My girlfriend's jealousy is getting worst by the day..The other day she flew into a rage while looking at my calendar and demanded to know who April and May were.
I heard barbarians are pretty popular nowadays.
You could say they are all the rage.
Bulls on a Parade
On a hot sunny day, I went to a record store. A song was playing on the speakers. Angrily, I picked up a hammer and started banging the speaker system.
The confused owner asked, "What is this?"
I said, "Rage Against the Machine."
What kind of exercises are all the rage in Kenya?
Anairobics.
My 5 year old son just told me that I have a head like a lightbulb.
I'm incandescent with rage.
People who get road rage against people riding bicycles.
They've got serious cyclelogical issues.
There's a trendy, new anger problem.
It's all the rage.
A wife comes home from a long day at work
She goes to her room and she sees a pair of feminine feet in the bed with a pair of manly feet.
Assuming that her husband is cheating on her, she goes into a rage and starts beating their legs.
After about 20 seconds of punching, she hears her husband call from the kitchen Honey! Just wanted to let you know your parents are here
What happens when a stereoid user drives their car?
They get roid rage.
A nun is doing her rounds around town. . .
. . .when she turns the corner near a bar, only to collide with a mean-looking, stumbling drunk. The drunk flies into a rage, and punches her in the face. He then kicks her square in the gut, and begins to brutally pummel her head and face as she doubles over.
Within a minute, she is reduced to a quivering, sobbing mess on the sidewalk. The drunk spits on the nun, and sneers.
"Yeah. . .not so fuckin' tough NOW, eh Batman?"
I feel like with all this political stuff going on, its become popular with a lot of people to be angry all the time.
Some might say its all the rage.
I don't get all the rage about this new trend.
Donkey meat is really tough!
A man finds another man with his wife in bed. In a fit of rage, he shoots him.
The wife says, Keep it up and you'll lose all your friends
TIL I did not have Road Rage
turns out I'm just an angry drunk...
I'm starting an anger management group for mechanical engineers.
I'm calling it Machine Against the Rage
The Incredible Hulk has started his own fashion line.
It's all the rage.
How is a fidget spinner like the cause of my father's heart attack?
It was all the rage last year.
You haven't heard of The Incredible Hulk's new fashion line?
It's all the rage.
Girl, you're like PCP...
You're toxic and fill me with uncontrollable rage.
A documentary of when Elton John developed anger problems and went to anger management.
Goodbye Yellow Brick Road Rage.
I need to make a presentation for school. It'll be about how some women get madder than some men, or the other way around.
It'll be called "The Gender Rage Gap"
This is a bad one
I was once at a party. After some time I noticed that I lost my watch. I was looking for it everywhere. I finally saw it laying on the floor on the other side of the room. When I got there, I witnessed how some guy stepped on it, while harassing a girl. Filled with rage I went up to him and punched him on the nose. No one treats a girl like that. Not on my watch!
P.s.: not mine I found it in the comments on pornhub
Another three friends brag about sex.
Friend A starts "I won the lottery last month and now women keep having sex me, I've slept with at least one girl a night since!"
Friend B counters "Well I'm a model with over 2 million Instagram followers. I pick up several women a day all willing to have sex with me!"
Friend C, in a fit of jealous rage kills both friends and screams over their corpses "Well now I'm going to prison so I'll have sex everyday for the next 25 to life!"
What was the Luddite's favorite band?
Rage Against the Machine.
China have announced their new rage of meat free snacks.
"Not Poodle"
Was in court with the ex wife over who'd get the kids in the divorce, she told the judge about the time I flew into a rage a threw an enitre trifle at her
So of course she got custardy.
A critic reads what the local newspapers say about him
The papers say that everything he says seems to contradict itself. Baffled and deeply offended by this, the critic loudly proclaimed:
"My rage is indescribable!"
Why are the scottish mean?
They 'ave rage
The Body Acceptance Movement really died quick
It seems like anti-bodies are all the rage right now
An American is typing on a computer when he flies into a rage, shouting "How the hell am I misspelling color"?
A Canadian takes a quick look at the screen before rolling his eyes and walking away, saying "that sounds like a you problem".
A blonde comes home early from work to find her husband in bed with another woman.
Shocked and furious, she pulls out a gun from her purse and points it at the couple on the bed. They recoil in fear.
But after a few seconds, the expression on the blondes face shifts from rage to one of sadness and despair.
She turns the gun away from the couple and points it at her own head.
Seeing this, her husband cries out, "Honey, wait...don't!"
She screams back at him, "Shut up! You're next!"
I told my friend that I never knew that Rage Against the Machine was so political, and that it really ruined the music for me.
He looked at me deadpan and asked, "What machine did you think they were raging against, the dishwasher?
Did you know spiders go deaf if they have no legs?
Well it's true and here's why.
When I was a child I had a pet a spider. It was great I even trained him to jump. 'Jump' I'd shout and with a boing he'd leap into the air.
Well my brother saw this and in a jealous rage he pulled the spiders legs off!
I was heartbroken. 'Jump' I'd shout and the spider would just sit there. Not only had he lost his legs, he'd gone deaf too.
Apparently Tucker Carlson is starting a new band
Rage sponsored by the machine
Jim and Joe are sitting at a bar drinking and jim asks where is John? Joe says John is missing . What happened asks Jim . Well joe says
John forgot his wedding anniversary again. His wife flew into a fit of rage, walked out to the driveway pointed to the ground and said., I want a present that goes from 0 to 200 really fast and I want it here by tomorrow morning.
Fine says Jim but that doesn't explain where John is.
Well continued Joe they next morning his wife woke up walked out side and saw a big box with a ribbon so she opened it and saw a new set of bathroom scales and John hasn't been seen since
What do you call a Pharaoh who has road rage?
Tootin' car man. (My friend swears she made up this joke so I'm pretty sure this is actual OC)
Why is anger the new hip emotion?
It's all the rage.
An unknown number calls a man at work.
He immediately hangs up without saying anything.
His boss watches him do this and asks, "Why did you hang up?"
The man answers, "I didn't know the number".
His boss, seething with rage, shouts "CALL THEM BACK RIGHT NOW".
The man complied and calls them back, saying, "911, what's your emergency?"
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the rage rant jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working rage tantrum piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.