The Best 20 Raffle Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Raffle jokes. There are some raffle losers jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these raffle donation puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Raffle Jokes and Puns

When I was a boy, my dad gave me money to go downtown and pay the electric bill

But instead, I bought raffle tickets for a chance to win a new truck.

I told my dad when I got home and he beat my ass.

The next morning, however, there was a brand new truck in the driveway.

We all held each other and cried, especially me because it was the truck from the electric company there to turn off the lights.

So dad beat my ass again

The father of five children had won a toy at a raffle.

He called his kids together to ask which one should have the present.

"Who is the most obedient?" he asked. "Who never talks back to Mother? Who does everything she says?"

The five kids answered in union. "Okay, Dad. You get the toy."

A dad joke with which we can all sympathize

The father of five children had won a toy at a raffle. He called his kids together to ask which one should get the present.

"Who is the most obedient?" he asked. "Who never talks back to mother? Who does everything she says?"

Five small voices answered in union, "Okay, dad. You get the toy."

Raffle joke, A dad joke with which we can all sympathize

Young Chuck

One fine old day, Young Chuck moved to Texas and bought a donkey from a farmer for $100.00.
The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day.

The next day he drove up and said, 'Sorry son, but I have some bad news, the donkey died.'
Chuck replied, 'Well, then just give me my money back.'
The farmer said, 'Can't do that. I went and spent it already.'
Chuck said, 'OK, then, just bring me the dead donkey.'
The farmer asked, 'What ya gonna do with him?
Chuck said, 'I'm going to raffle him off.'
The farmer said 'You can't raffle off a dead donkey!'
Chuck said, 'Sure I can, watch me. I just won't tell anybody he's dead.'

A month later, the farmer met up with Chuck and asked, 'What happened with the dead donkey?'
Chuck said, 'I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at two dollars apiece and made a profit of $898.00.'
The farmer said, 'Didn't anyone complain?'
Chuck said, 'Just the guy who won. So I gave him his two dollars back.'

Chuck now works on Wall Street.

What happens when you win a raffle twice that gave you five for the price of three on rugby tickets?

You won two, three for five six nations tickets


I saw a raffle at a graveyard...

i knew something was wrong there, it was a dead giveaway...

Just bought a raffle ticket, top prize a Mediterranean cruise.

Last week's was a rollover

Raffle joke, Just bought a raffle ticket, top prize a Mediterranean cruise.

One time I won a raffle in England, turns out it was for knighthood.

Boy was I Sir prized

today i won a raffle.

received a life supply of marmite, one whole jar.

A man walks into a bar.

He has a pig under his arm. "Where did you get that?" asks the barman. "I won him in a raffle" replies the pig.

I won the meat raffle in the bar.


Wasn't the answer my kids were expecting when they asked how I met their mother.

You can explore raffle entries reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean raffle donate dad jokes. There are also raffle puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


I used to think my wife was one in a million

Now i think she was won in a raffle.

Did you hear about the people holding a raffle with the prize as a coffin?

It was a dead giveaway.

Prisoner A approaches Prisoner B...

"Wanna buy a ticket for the Chief Wardens ball?"

"Nah. I don't dance."

"It's not a dance, it's a raffle".

A 1970's Raffle

A raffle is being run by an American TV Station in the 1970's:

First prize: One week in Moscow

Second Prize: Two weeks in Moscow

Third Prize: Three weeks in Moscow

I won a raffle at a Home Depot once.

They gave me a choice between a tool that can help me climb to high places, or a pair of goggles to protect my eyes.

I chose the latter.

Raffle joke, I won a raffle at a Home Depot once.

I bought some raffle tickets from a local charity for a big fundraiser and won the early bird prize.

It was a worm.

Who never wants to be drawn at a raffle?

Mohammed

Your mother is like a Christmas raffle.

$1 a strip.


My friend has just got back from Africa and isn't feeling well

He keeps buying raffle tickets. Im worried he has tombola...

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the raffle won jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working raffle lotto piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes