The Best 13 Raccoons Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Raccoons jokes. There are some raccoons possum jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these raccoons firetruck puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Raccoons Jokes and Puns

As migration approached, two elderly vultures

As migration approached, two elderly vultures doubted they could make the trip south, so they decided to go by airplane.

When they checked their baggage, the attendant noticed that they were carrying two dead raccoons. "Do you wish to check the raccoons through as luggage?" she asked.

"No, thanks," replied the vultures. "They're carrion."

A vulture is boarding an airplane carrying two dead raccoons.

The stewardess says, "I'm sorry sir, there is only one carrion allowed per passenger."

What did the stewardess say when the vulture tried to board the plane with two dead raccoons?

"Sorry, only one carrion per passenger."

Raccoons joke, What did the stewardess say when the vulture tried to board the plane with two dead raccoons?

Two vultures board an airplane, each carrying two dead raccoons.

The flight attendant looks at them and says, "I'm sorry, gentlemen, only one carrion allowed per passenger."

Soo... I'm night blind.

I've ran over a lot of animals. Opossums, squirrels, raccoons. Dogs and cats of course. There was this one animal I never could figure out what it was. It yelled "Stop". It must have been a parrot.


Raccoons are the animal of 2020

They always wash their hands and wear a mask

The British are very strange people.

They call pants 'trousers', shopping carts 'trolleys' and 6.7 raccoons in a human suit 'Prince Phillip'.

Raccoons joke, The British are very strange people.

A vulture carrying two dead raccoons tries to board an airplane...

and the flight attendant says, "I'm sorry, sir. You're only allowed one carrion."

So the other day I tried to bring 2 dead raccoons on an airplane...

but the lady at the desk told me a second carrion costs extra.

What do you call a team of superpowered coyotes, raccoons, and vultures?

The Scavengers.

A vulture boards a plane...

...carrying with him two dead raccoons. The stewardess says, "I'm sorry, but we only allow each passenger one carrion."

You can explore raccoons truckload reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean raccoons carcasses dad jokes. There are also raccoons puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


What did the flight attendant say to the vulture who dragged two dead raccoons onto the flight?

I'm sorry sir, but you're only allowed one carrion

Why aren't raccoons afraid of the rain?

Because they're made out of hats.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the raccoons armadildo jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working raccoons luckly piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes