Following is our collection of Rabbits jokes which are very funny. There are some rabbits chickens jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these rabbits petshop puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
In hareplanes.
...from farmer Brown's field. One turns to the other and says, "This carrot is pithy." The other rabbit says, "I guess so. I just pithed on it."
When they both died unexpectedly, she decided to get them stuffed so she took them to a taxidermist.
"Would you like them mounted?" the taxidermist asked.
She thought about it for a moment and said, "no, holding hands is fine".
An experimental psychologist pulls habits out of rats.
but from a distance they looked like hares
A magician makes rabbits appear in hats, while a psychologist makes habits appear in rats.
HIP HOP
Because they dig homes.
The Hare Force
With lots of hops!
You can explore rabbits hoppy reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean rabbits outnumber dad jokes. There are also rabbits puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
A Receding hairline
A pair of newlyweds are out for drinks with a middle-aged couple who have been married for twenty years.
Having knocked back a few, the older husband turns to the newlyweds and remarks with a wink: "I bet you two are like a couple of rabbits in the bedroom."
The newlyweds laugh awkwardly at this, and then the young husband asks "Well, what kind of bedroom animals are you two then?"
The older husband screws up his face and thinks about it for a moment, then exclaims wryly: "Don't know about me, but Margaret here would have to be a camel: she can go for weeks and weeks without sex."
Without missing a beat, Margaret replies: "That's funny because I was thinking George here would also be a camel: two humps and it's over."
Michael J Fox was hunting rabbits.
From a distance they'll look like hares.
the one rabbit says to the other
"This is fun, wasn't it?'
Because it's made of hops.
It's much easier when you start with two.
I got analogy to rabbits, analogy to grass, analogy to mold...
They ran until they couldn't run anymore. Holed up in a hollow log, the rabbits were safely out of reach while the hounds bayed outside.
The boy rabbit looked at the girl rabbit and asked, "What do we do now?"
"We stay here until we outnumber them."
- Woody Guthrie
The CIA show up after a few days and release a 6000 word article on the fact that rabbits don't exist.
The FBI show up with a dead rabbit and say in a press release "The rabbit had it coming."
The KGB show up with a bruised and beaten bear. The bear is forced to make a statement "I am a rabbit, my father was a rabbit, and my mother is a rabbit. My whole family are rabbits!" the bear disappears shortly after...
Silly kids, rabbits are for tricks!
Kanagaroos. While they both do great with the hops, Kangaroos just have a little more kick!
Two rabbits were being chased by a pack of wolves. The wolves chased the rabbits into a thicket. After a few minutes, one rabbit turned to the other and said, "Well, do you want to make a run for it or stay here a few days and outnumber them?"
With out their tea they'd be Rabbis.
So she took them to the taxidermist to get them stuffed. The taxidermist asked her "would you like them mounted?" "No" she replied, "just holding hands."
One rabbyte
The wife's insisting I quit my job, because she thinks it's cruel we've started testing our new products on rabbits.
She's got a point, I suppose...
I work in a hammer factory.
One turned to the other and asked "Do we make a run for it or stay here and outnumber them?"
A receding hairline
Recieding hare line.
A receding hareline
I found it to be a hare raising experience.
A receding hare line.
One says to the other "should we stop and outnumber them?"
...
"keep running you fool we're brothers!!"
When I inquired as to why he had rabbits on his head, he simply stated "From a distance they look like hares"
A retreating hare line.
A balding man said to his wife
"I've bought several rabbits for the garden"
Why?
"Well from a distance it'll look like I have lots of hare"
Until you get up close they look just like hares.
A receding hare line
My neighbor's pair of pet rabbits died unexpectedly within hours of each other. She was distraught. I suggested she go to my friend the taxidermist. When she arrived, my friend tried to console her and she asked him if he could create a memorial. "Of course", he replied. He explained that he could stuff them and they would almost look lifelike. He asked if she would like them mounted.
"No" she said, "holding paws would be fine."
Hare conditioning
Then I realized that they pretty much know what to do.
rabbi
A receding hair line.
In the hare force.
Dad walks by little johnny's room and hears "how much is 5 plus 5?"
He walks in and asks little johnny "why are you talking to your rabbit?"
Johnny says: "This one is stupid, the teacher told me that rabbits can multiply very fast but this one can't even add up"
Albany.
Doesn't matter as long as it's hoppy
One pulls rabbits out of hats and the other polls habits out of rats
baby rabbits
So they could add the hops.
A receding hare-line
You might say my anaconda don't want none unless you got buns, hon.
Rabbi.
Because old rabbits die hard
Bunny hops
They are both hare raising.
Hip-hop.
A rabbit poked a man and asked
Give me carrots, I want carrots
The man ignored the rabbit
The rabbit poked the man again
Give me carrots, I want carrots
The man is annoyed at this point, but continues to ignore the rabbit
Again rabbit pokes the man
Give me carrots I said
The man grabs the rabbit and pulls out the rabbits teeth
Rabbit pokes the man again and says
Give me carrot juice
Warren
How do you catch a unique rabbit?
Unique up on it.
How do you catch a tame rabbit?
Tame way, unique up on it.
How do you catch a common rabbit?
Comm-on, tame way, unique up on it.
When he sees a woman on a shady corner. He goes up to ask if she's alright and she responds
"I'm a hooker, are you interested?"
The man decides to live a little and takes her up on her offer and they go back to his car and go at it like rabbits.
Some time during, a cop pulls up and knocks on the window.
"Excuse me sir what exactly are you doing?"
The man answers "I'm having sex with my wife"
The cop replies with "I apologize, I didn't know."
The man responds with "Me neither."
I do hare cuts, only.
The officer says, "Take this pistol and shoot A TALL BLACK GUY AND THREE WHITE RABBITS."
So the candidate asks,"why the three white rabbits?".
Officer"that's the kind of attitude we're looking for. You're selected".
They don't have hare.
From a distance they looked like hares.
A receding hare line.
A receding hare line.
A nest
What do you call a group of birds
A flock
What do you call a group of Lions
Dangerous
Cotton balls.
A receding hare-line.
Hat tip to whoever posted the previous hair-themed rabbit joke.
A hunter is talking with another hunter "Yesterday, we went on hunt with the others and I killed 3 rabbits, 2 foxes et 5 notuss"
The other hunter replied "What's a notuss ?"
The first hunter then said "I don't know, while I was shooting they were shouting "Not us, not us !""
The wolves chased the rabbits into a thicket. After a few minutes, one rabbit turned to the other and said, "Well, do you want to make a run for it or stay here a few days and outnumber them?
76
They buck like funnies.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the rabbits hare jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working rabbits bear and rabbit piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.