The Best 24 Rabbis Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Rabbis jokes. There are some rabbis priests jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these rabbis bris puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 of the Funniest Rabbis Jokes and Puns
What do rabbis call the leftovers of a circumcision?
Debris.
Do Rabbis get paid for performing circumcisions?
Nope, they just keep the tips.
What kind of karate do Rabbis know?
Jew Jitsu.
Why do orthodox rabbis like lemonade so much?
Because, it's acidic juice.
Why can't Rabbis eat pork and Priests can't have sex?
Because the Rabbis got to choose first.
Why must rabbits never miss dinner?
With out their tea they'd be Rabbis.
What does a sick, Jewish dog have?
Rabbis!
What do monks, rabbis, and Mormon priests have in common with brains?
The all tend to be found enclosed within temples.
I was going to break up a fight between two Rabbis...
But they were just arguing semitics.
How do Rabbis make money?
They keep the tips.
A scientist and a hooker walk into a bar...
But find that they can't open the door due to an over-saturation of priests, rabbis, lawyers, and Irishmen inside.
You can explore rabbis kosher reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean rabbis orthodox dad jokes. There are also rabbis puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
What do you call three rabbis in a hot tub?
A jewcuzzi
What do you get when rabbis eat too many carrots?
Orange juice.
How many rabbis does it take to change a lightbulb?
Only one but the lightbulb has to want to change.
(Heard this from my local rabbi)
How do Rabbis organise their books?
The Jewey Decimal System.
Jewish Rabbis don't get paid for circumsion...
They just get tips
A priest, a monk, and a Rabbi walk into a barbershop.
A priest walks into a barbershop. After he gets his hair cut, he goes to pay. The barber says "I do not charge men of faith." The next day the priest leaves twelve eggs in front of the barbershop as thanks.
Soon after, a monk walks into the same barbershop and gets his hair cut for free. The monk leaves twelve apples by the door as thanks.
A few days later, a Rabbi walks into the barbershop. He gets his free haircut. The next day the barber comes to work to see twelve Rabbis by the door.
Four rabbis were golfing
You don't usually see casual rabbis
but I did see one the other day. He was in the menorah tee.
You can't go to a synagogue without giving money to the rabbis.
You have to pay your Jews.
Did you know most Rabbis don't get paid for circumcisions?
But they get decent tips!
Rabbis make no money doing circumcisions.
But they do get a lot of tips.
What do you call two rabbis fighting?
Jew-jitsu
Why were 2 rabbis fighting?
Over who gets to keep the tip.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the rabbis congregations jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working rabbis catholicism piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.