Question Mark Jokes
59 question mark jokes and hilarious question mark puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about question mark that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Question Mark Short Jokes
Short question mark jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The question mark humour may include short raises question jokes also.
- As the teacher marked my quiz answers, she said, "This is wrong." "Question 2 ?" I asked.
"No, the way your hand is resting between my thighs." - What has 4 letters, sometimes has 9 letters, but never has 5 letters. Hint: has 4 letters.
Another hint: there is no question mark. - 28 consonants, 3 vowels, a question mark and 1 comma went to court They're awaiting their sentence
- It's Important To Know When To Use A Period And When To Use A Question Mark Otherwise you might tell someone "your daughter is having their first question mark."
- What starts with a W and ends in a question mark? What starts with a W and ends in a question mark?
- How Long Is An Asian Name It wasn't a question, hence the missing question mark. How Long really is an Asian name!
- What's a prisoner's favourite piece of punctuation? Periods, exclamation marks, or question marks - whichever one ends the sentence quicker.
- How Long is a Chinese Name Now read the title again, without that question mark you added.
- How can you tell if you're being persecuted by agnostics? You come home to find a question mark burned into your lawn.
- Did you hear about the confused question mark? He couldn't figure out how he got a period.
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Question Mark One Liners
Which question mark one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with question mark? I can suggest the ones about question and thinking question.
- Exam question: According to Germany how much is Greece worth? [1 Mark]
- what did the police do when they wanted to interrogate mark? question mark.
- How long is a china-man? Excuse the question mark, "How Long" is in fact a china man.
- What's next to England? A question mark.
- What comes after Z? A question mark.
- What do you write when you want to ask Mark something? Question mark.
- Why can't a blonde dial 911? You can't dial a question mark
- I have a question, Mark...
- How do you drive a Unitarian out of town? Burn a question mark on their front lawn.
- Don't put a question mark where God put a period.
- Chuck Norris has never used a question mark in his life.
- 4, 8, 16, 32, ?, 128. What's the "?". A question mark.
- I've been described as a s**... symbol However, that symbol is a question mark
The Funniest Question Mark Jokes for a Bone-Shaking Laugh
What funny jokes about question mark you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean question type jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make question mark pranks.
The Question Mark was invented after scientists attempted to measure the speed of a Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick.
Chuck Norris invented the question mark.
.. so he could say the sentence "Do you want to die slowly of fast?"
Bad News
In the Hospital the relatives gathered in the waiting room, where their family member lay gravely ill. Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and somber.
I'm afraid I am the bearer of bad news, he said as he surveyed the worried faces, The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain transplant. It's an experimental procedure, semi-risky, and you will have to pay for the brain yourselves.
The family members sat silent as they absorbed the news. After a length of time, someone asked, Well, how much does a brain cost? The Doctor quickly responded, $5000 for a male brain, and $200 for a female brain.
The moment turned awkward. Men in the room tried not to smile, avoiding eye contact with the women, but some actually smirked. A man, unable to control his curiosity, blurted out the question everyone wanted to ask, Why is the male brain so much more?
The doctor smiled at the childish innocence and then to the entire group said, It's just standard pricing procedure. We have to mark down the price of the female brains, because they've been used.
An arab guy walks into a bra store owned by a Jewish guy on a sunday afternoon...
The arab guy finds a bra he likes and asks for the price. Jewish guy being the business man that he is says "This is a great bra it's really starting to get polular. I can sell you each for 50 bucks." The arab guy nods and says "sure I'll buy 100."
The next sunday the arab guy comes back to bra shop and looks around and finds another bra he likes. The Jewish guy smiles and thinks he's gonna try to mark up the price. He goes up the the arab guy and says "Thats a great lace bra. Its imported from Italy its very popular and worn by a bunch of celebrities. They go for 60$ per bra" The arab guy nods and says "sure Ill buy 150 of them."
The sunday after that the arab guy comes back to the bra shop and finds another bra. The jewish guy gets excited and thinks 'im gonna get him this time' and says " This is our brand new silk bra imported from France. Only the finest materials used and its extremely comfortable. I can sell you these for 80$ each" The arab guy nods and says "ill take 200 of them"
They go to the counter and the Jewish guy get curious so he asks "If i may ask you a question, What are you doing with all these bras?" the Arab guy smiles and says "I cut them in half and sell them as Yamaka's for 200 a piece!"
4 MBA students went out on a night before their exam and were boozing hard.
They did not study for the test and thought of a plan to escape. So they went to their dean looking weary and worn out, their dresses covered in grease and dirt.
They told their dean that they had all gone to a wedding the previous day and while coming back their car tire had blown up. So they had to push the car all way back to the hostel as there was no help available on the way. So they said that they were not in a position to write the test that day and asked him to conduct a retest later.
The dean being a kind man he was asked them to come to a retest 3 days later.
The boys were very happy and went to prepare in full swing.
After 3 days the dean asked them to come for the test.
The dean said that the test had 2 questions for 100 marks.
He said that they had to write the test in separate rooms.
As the boys had prepared well they agreed. The test went as follows.
TEST
Q.1 Write your name
Q.2 Which tire burst?
Importance of Planning
Why planning is important?
One night four college students were playing till late night and could not study for the test which was scheduled for the next day.
In the morning they thought of a plan. They made themselves look as dirty with grease and dirt. They then went up to the Dean and said that they had gone out to a wedding last night and on their return the tire of their car burst and they had to push the car all the way back and that they were in no condition to appear for the test.
So the Dean said they could have the re-test after 3 days. They thanked him and said they would be ready by that time.
On the third day they appeared before the Dean. The Dean said that as this was a Special Condition Test, all four were required to sit in separate classrooms for the test. They all agreed as they had prepared well in the last 3 days.
The test consisted of 2 questions with a total of 100 Marks.
See below for the question paper.
Q.1. Your Name…….. ………
(2 MARKS)
Q.2. Which tyre burst?
(98 MARKS)
a) Front left
b) Front right
c) Back left
d) Back right
Exam By Chance
A young student reported for a final examination that consisted of only true/false questions.
The student took a seat in the hall, stared at the test for five minutes, removed a coin from his pocket and started tossing the coin and marking the answer sheet. Heads meant true, tails meant false.
The young student finished the exam in 30 minutes, while the rest of the class was sweating it out.
Suddenly, during the last few minutes, the young student began desperately throwing the coin and sweating profusely.
The moderator, alarmed, approached the student and asked what was going on.
"Well, I finished the exam in half an hour," said the student, "but I thought I ought to recheck my answers."
There was a question about Greece's economy in a German maths exam. What was it worth?
Two marks.
A man visits a priest for confession...
An elderly man in Germany walks into a confessional box after feeling the urge that he needed to confess.
Man: Forgive me father, for I have sinned. During the great war I hid a Jewish r**... in my attic.
Priest: Well, that's not a sin my son, but rather a heroic act of great compassion and daring.
Man: But I made him agree to pay me 20 marks for each week he stayed.
Priest: I must admit, that wasn't a great decision, but I am sure you did it for a good cause.
Man: God bless you father, that puts my mind to rest, just one more question however...
Priest: Yes my son?
Man: Do I have to tell him the war is over?
Four college students partied hard one night.....
...and woke up late the next day, the day of their finals, so they went to their principal and apologized saying they visited an orphanage and on their way back their car's tire got punctured and they had to push it all the way back home......
The principal thought of giving them a second chance and said they can come in tomorrow and appear for the test.
Next day, they all appear having prepared hard the last night. The principal puts each of them in a different room with invigilators, and hands them their question paper,..
1. What is today's date ? [2 marks]
2. Which tire got punctured ? [98 marks]
Law Interpretation
Alex failed in the final Law Exam & decided to make a deal with the Professor.
Alex: Sir, Can I ask you one question?
Professor: Yes.
Alex: If you can answer this question, I will accept my final marks, if you cant, you will have to give me an "A" grading.
Professor agreed.
Alex asked: What is legal but not logical, logical but not legal & neither legal nor logical?
Even after some long and hard consideration, the professor cannot give The student an answer, and therefore changes his exam mark into an "A", as agreed.
The following day, Professor asked same question to his students. He was shocked when all of them raised their hands......
He asked one student. He answered:
Sir, you are 65, married to a 28 yrs old woman, this is legal but not logical. Your wife, is having an affair with a 23 year old boy, this is logical but not legal. Your wife's boyfriend has failed in his exam & yet you have given him an "A", this is neither logical nor legal
Biology Lesson
Dr Adams is holding forth to his college students on biology and anatomy. "Miss Baker, can you tell me which part of the human body can expand by up to 10 times, and under what conditions?"
Miss Baker blushes furiously, and says, "That is not an appropriate question to ask a lady, and I will report you to the Dean."
Dr Adams just nods and says, "Miss Conrad, same question."
Miss Conrad stands and says, "The pupil of the eye, under dim light."
Dr Adams nods again and says "Correct, full marks for Miss Conrad." Then he turns and says, "Miss Baker, I can tell you three things. First, you have not studied. Second, you have a dirty mind. Third, you are going to suffer a grave disappointment."
Skype conversation
A: you home
B: Please! If you are asking me, please add at least a question mark. I'm starting to feel paranoid that you are actually watching me
A: haha?
Little Johnny was learning about punctuation
The teacher was explaining all of the different punctuation marks.
She listed the comma, question mark and when she got to period; Little Johnny raised his hand.
He asked: Why are periods so important?
The teacher responded: Well, they are a fundamental part of the written language; why do you ask?
Little Johnny replied: Yesterday my sister said she missed a period and my Mom fainted, my Dad started yelling and the next door neighbor shot himself
An Oxford comma walks into a bar, where it spends the evening watching the television getting drunk and smoking cigars.
A question mark walks into a bar?
A nun was fired from her job in heaven...
A nun was fired from her job in heaven, so she came down to earth and started looking for a job. One night, when she is filling out a job application, there is a question that asks her to check the boxes next to the jobs that she has previously worked at. She looks at the answers for a second, and then checks the box marked, "Nun of the above."
As the teacher marked my quiz answers, she suddenly stopped, looked up at me and shook her head in utter disappointment. With cold, dead eyes, she muttered, "This is wrong." Mouth dry, I whispered, "Question 2?"
She snarled, "No, the way your hand is resting between my thighs."
Finals be like.
**EXAMINATION COUNCIL OF ZAMBIA**
SPECIAL PAPER 6
Time: 15 minutes.
Answer all questions. Do not turn this paper until you are told to do so. Each question carries 10 marks.
1-Black is a color and white is also a color, but black and white television is not a color television. Discuss, 10 marks.
2-1f soap and water makes the body clean, then what makes the towel dirt after bath? Discuss, 10 marks.
3-Can you trust a nurse whose husband sells coffins? Discuss, 10 marks.
You are free to use a calculator
What character do you write at the end of the sentence, when a duck asks a question?
A quack-tion mark.
Why can't Mark Zuckerberg appear before the EU parliament to answer questions?
Because his charger is 2 pin and the EU uses a different voltage.
Schooltrip
Schooltrip to Facebook HQ, questions time. Kid: Mark, my dad says, that you spy on people. Is that true? Mark: he is not your dad.
James and John were given a question from their teacher to which they had to answer
Their question was to write the past tense of a sentence
The boy has a cold
James wrote The boy had a cold
John wrote The boy had had a cold because it is grammatically correct to say 'had had' back to back
The teacher looked at the two answers and proceeded to mark Johns as correct and James's as incorrect
So to summarise: John, while James had had 'had', had, had had 'had had'; 'had had' had had a better effect on the teacher.
To clarify: this is not my joke, I found it on a video and it was really funny so I decided to post it
Herschel Walker made a speech in front of his GOP peers a day after the debate..
"They said I can't speak good on stage without a prompter" he said.
"But whose laughing now question mark Ha comma ha comma ha"