Quarter Inch Jokes
5 quarter inch jokes and hilarious quarter inch puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about quarter inch that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Share These Quarter Inch Jokes With Friends
The Funniest Quarter Inch Jokes for a Bone-Shaking Laugh
What is a good quarter inch joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
What's the difference between a male and female chocolate Easter bunny?
About a quarter inch of chocolate
A Little Man
A man walks into a bar and says, "Bartender, give me two shots." Bartender says, "You want them both now or one at a time?" The guy says," Oh, I want them both now. One's for me and one's for this little guy here," and he pulls a tiny three inch man out of his pocket.
The bartender asks "He can drink?"
"Oh, sure. He can drink."
So the bartender pours the shots and sure enough, the little guy drinks it all up.
"That's amazing" says the bartender. "What else can he do, can he walk?"
The man flicks a quarter down to the end of the bar and says, "Hey, Jake. Go get that." The little guy runs down to the end of the bar and picks up the quarter. Then he runs back down and gives it to the man.
The bartender is in total shock. "That's amazing" he says, "what else can he do? Does he talk?"
The man says "Sure he talks, hey, Jake, tell him about that time we were in Africa and you made fun of that witch doctor's powers!"
A Very Short Man
A man walks into a bar and says, "Bartender, give me two shots." Bartender says, "You want them both now or one at a time?" The guy says," Oh, I want them both now. One's for me and one's for this little guy here," and he pulls a tiny three inch man out of his pocket.
The bartender asks "He can drink?"
"Oh, sure. He can drink."
So the bartender pours the shots and sure enough, the little guy drinks it all up.
"That's amazing" says the bartender. "What else can he do, can he walk?"
The man flicks a quarter down to the end of the bar and says, "Hey, Jake. Go get that." The little guy runs down to the end of the bar and picks up the quarter. Then he runs back down and gives it to the man.
The bartender is in total shock. "That's amazing" he says, "what else can he do? Does he talk?"
The man says "Sure he talks, hey, Jake, tell him about that time we were in Africa and you made fun of that witch doctor!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Lawyer and Witness
A witness to an automobile accident was testifying.
The following exchange took place between the lawyer
and the witness:
The lawyer: "Did you actually see the accident?"
The witness: "Yes, sir."
The lawyer: "How far away were you when the accident
happened?"
The witness: "Thirty-one feet, six and one quarter inches."
The lawyer (thinking he'd trap the witness): "Well,
sir, will you tell the jury how you knew it was exactly
that distance?"
The witness: "Because when the accident happened I took
out a tape and measured it. I knew some s**... lawyer
would ask me that question."
A man walks into a bar and says, "Bartender, give me two shots.
"
Bartender says, "You want them both now or one at a time?" The guy says," Oh, I want them both now.
One's for me and one's for this little guy here," and he pulls a tiny three inch man out of his pocket.
The bartender asks "He can drink?"
"Oh, sure. He can drink."
So the bartender pours the shots and sure enough, the little guy drinks it all up.
"That's amazing" says the bartender. "What else can he do, can he walk?"
The man flicks a quarter down to the end of the bar and says,
"Hey, Jake.
Go get that." The little guy runs down to the end of the bar and picks up the quarter.
Then he runs back down and gives it to the man.
The bartender is in total shock.
"That's amazing" he says, "what else can he do?
Does he talk?"
The man says "Sure he talks, hey, Jake, tell him about that time we were in Africa and you made fun of that witch doctor's powers!"
Share These Quarter Inch Jokes With Friends