Quant Jokes
30 quant jokes and hilarious quant puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about quant that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Howlingly Hilarious Quant Jokes for All Ages to Enjoy
What is a good quant joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
Quantum entanglement is not hard to understand:
Socks come in pairs. If you put a sock on your left foot, the other sock of the pair instantly becomes the right sock, no matter where it is located in the universe.
Are quantum computers going to change our world?
Yes and no.
Why did the quantum physicist have such toned abs?
Because they planck constant.
What does the quantum duck say?
Quark Quark
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Quantum physicists have the best s**....
They know all the super positions.
A quantum physicist and his friend go out for ice cream.
"What's your favourite flavour?" asks the friend.
"Charm," replies the physicist.
His friend looks at him.
"Why is it that whenever I ask you a question," begins the friend, "your answer is always strange?"
"Well it's strange *now*," the physicist protests, "shouldn't have waited a picosecond."
I have a quantum mechanic...
He both repairs and doesn't repair my car at the same time, and I can never be certain of what the charge will be.
Why are quantum physicists such bad lovers?
When they find the position, they can't find the momentum. And if they do find the momentum, then they can't find the position.
Why do quantum computers make terrible community leaders?
Because you can never be sure of their true values.
A quantum object turns from wave to a particle...
"It's just a prank bro! Look, there's the observer!!"
Why is quantum physics so much harder than regular physics?
Because in regular physics, if something can go wrong, it will.
But in quantum physics, if something *could* go wrong, it will.
Can a quantum computer run Crysis?
yes and no
What's a quantum physicist's favorite trend?
Plancking.
Quantum Physics jokes
I don't always make jokes about Quantum Physics, but when I do, I don't
Some quantum physicists play twister at a party
Later that day, one of them spontaneously flattens and three seconds later the other is hit by a car: they were still entangled.
The quantity of consonants in the English language is constant.
If omitted in one place, they turn up in another. When a
Bostonian "pahks" his "cah," the lost r's migrate southwest,
causing a Texan to "warsh" his car and invest in "erl wells."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two quantum mechanics professors had s**...
They must have had physical chemistry.
Quantum physics has its ups and downs
But it all quarks out in the end
I own a quantum computer.
When I'm looking at it, things do not load. When I'm not, they instantly do so.
Why are quantum physicists bad lovers?
When they find the position, they can't find the momentum. When they find the momentum, they can't find the position.
There's a quantum observation theory where only police have consciousness
cop didn't see it I didn't do it
Quantum Computers are rubbish
When you want a result they collapse
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Quant One Liners
Which quant one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with quant? I can suggest the ones about humor and dank.
- What did the Quantum duck say? Quant ....Quant...Quant..
