Puff Jokes
42 puff jokes and hilarious puff puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about puff that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Make your day with a few laughs and a delicious snack! This article is all about funny jokes related to cream puffs, cheese puffs, powder puffs, cocoa puffs, cheeto puffs, flash, paw and krab. Enjoy these hilarious puns and pick your favorite puffy snack for a fun treat.
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Funniest Puff Short Jokes
Short puff jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The puff humour may include short huff jokes also.
- What are the most racist jokes you know? There were 3 car accidents in Mexico 70 people died.
What do you call a bunch of black people in a swimming pool?
Coco puffs. - TIL Dolphins deliberately get high on the nerve toxins of puffer fish by chewing on them and passing it around Talk about 'puff puff pass', amirite?
- Row row row your boat Roll roll roll your joint. Twist it at the end. Take a puff and that's enough. Now pass it to a friend.
- TIL the creator of Corn Pops also invented Cocoa Puffs, Frosted Flakes, Froot Loops, and Apple Jacks His tombstone just says "cereal entrepreneur"
- I think, therefore I am. Rene Descartes is sitting in a bar, having a drink. The bartender asks
him if he would like another.
I think not, he says, and vanishes in a puff of smoke. - What do you call a flattering, biased story about Sean Diddy Combs? A Puff (daddy) piece
- Ol McDonald had a farm, E I E I O. And on that farm he grew some crops. D E A Don't know!
And a puff puff there,
And a puff puff here,
There a puff, here a puff,
Everywhere a puff puff! - Did you hear Donkey Kong died?..... Me: Did you hear Donkey Kong died?
You: Diddy?
Me: NO, DONKEY!
Also:
Me: Did you hear Puff Daddy died?
You: Diddy?
Me: YEAH. - I just thought of a gay pick up line... "Would you be the Puff Daddy to my Biggie Smalls?"
- What's the most oxymoronic job ever? Well, I've never had a p**... blow puffs of air on my Johnson...
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Puff One Liners
Which puff one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with puff? I can suggest the ones about poof and pudding.
- What does the Big Bad Wolf do to get high? He huffs and he puffs.
- How do you make an apple puff? Chase it round the garden
- What do you call a bunch of bald black guys in a pool? Coco-Puffs
- What's the best way to eat Reese's puffs? Witherspoon
- What Harry Potter house was the Big Bad Wolf in? Huffle puff!
- What is fat, has no brain, and coated in an orange substance? a Cheeto puff
- How do you make a cheese puff? Chase it around the block.
- What do you call a gay baker? Puff pastry.
- *puff puff* where do aliens get their food? *puff puff*
The grocery star - Why does Puff Daddy have nice hair? Because Sean Combs.
- Sam sung a song, and PUFF! An apple materialized!
- What snake do get when cross a calculator with a steam engine? A puff-adder
- I need a high resolution photo of Puff Daddy... ... so I can make my 1080P. Diddy joke.
- Pac-man walks into Pizzeria... and promptly vanishes in a puff of logic.
- What do you call a rapper who likes honey for breakfast? Sugar Puff Daddy
Charming Humor Puff Jokes with Loads of Fun
What funny jokes about puff you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean blow jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make puff pranks.
An angel appears in a puff of smoke to a man and says to him, "Because you have lived a good and virtuous life, I can offer you a gift: you can be the most handsome man in the world, or you can have infinite wisdom, or you can have limitless wealth." Reflecting, the man says, "I'll take the wisdom"
"Wisdom is yours," says the angel, disappearing in another puff.
The smoke is barely clear before the man thinks, "I should have taken the money."
What to pick
An angel appears in a puff of smoke to a man and says to him, "Because you have lived a good and virtuous life, I can offer you a gift: you can be the most handsome man in the world, or you can have infinite wisdom, or you can have limitless wealth." Reflecting, the man says, "I'll take the wisdom"
"Wisdom is yours," says the angel, disappearing in another puff. The smoke is barely clear before the man thinks, "I should have taken the money."
A computer programmer was sitting at home with his wife.
He takes a cigarette out of his pocket, lights it, and takes a puff.
His wife looks at him angrily and says,
"You really need to stop doing that. Can't you see the warning on the box? It says 'hazardous to health!'"
The programmer takes another puff of his cigarette and says,
"I'm a computer programmer. I don't care about warnings. I only care about errors."
Joe was heading towards the end of a round of golf...
...when hit his ball into the woods and found it in a patch of pretty, yellow buttercups. Trying to get his ball back in play, he ended up thrashing just about every buttercup in the patch.
All of a sudden, p**...! In a flash and puff of smoke, a little old woman appeared.
She yelled, I'm Mother Nature! Do you know how long it took me to make those buttercups?
Just for doing what you have done, you won't have any butter for your popcorn for the rest of your life.
Better still, you won't have any butter for your toast for the rest of your life.
As a matter of fact, you'll never have any butter for anything for the rest of your life!!!
Then p**...! she was gone!
After Joe recovered from the shock, he hollered for his friend, Bill, where are you?
Bill yells back, I'm over here in the pussywillows.
Joe shouts back, 'DON'T SWING, BILL. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, DON'T SWING !
The Magic Mirror
In this public toilet, there's this magic mirror. Whenever you say something untruthful you disappear.
A red head walks into the toilets and says "I think I have the best legs in the world" and puff...she's gone.
Next a brunette walks into the toilets and says "I think I have the most sexist eyes" and puff...she's gone
Finally a blonde walks into the toilets and says "I think..." and puff she's gone!
Stalin's assistant enters his office
"Sir! There is a man here who wants to see you. He claims to be able to see the future with perfect accuracy!"
Stalin takes a puff from his pipe, and gives his order. "Execute him."
The assistant obeys and the man is promptly executed.
Later, with a lot of hesitation, the assistant asks. "Sir, why did you order this man's execution?"
Stalin looks at him calmly, and responds. "If he could really see the future, he would've seen this coming, and I can't stand charlatans."
Old genie joke...
Three men find themselves stranded on a deserted island. After several years, despite their differences, they become close friends out of necessity. One day, they find an old lamp. On rubbing it clean, they release a genie who grants them each one wish.
"I wish to return to my old life!" Two of the men shout, disappearing in a puff of smoke.
The third man, a little slow, looks around at the empty island. Overcome by loneliness, he mutters, "I wish my friends were here."
The tiny door to the magic castle was barely big enough to crawl through. It was carved with a half-lion, half-eagle, and guarded by a fearsome raven that would only allow you to pass if you breathed on its foot...
So basically you had to huff n puff on the raven claw then slither in the griffon door.
Why are pufferfish so expensive these days?
Inflation
Descartes in the Bar
René Descartes is sitting in a bar, drinking and going on and on to other customers about philosophy. He goes on and on into the night getting drunker.
The bartender asks Descartes if he'll have another drink.
"I think not," he replies and disappears in a puff of logic.
I was cleaning out my elderly neighbour's back garden yesterday when I came across a lamp.
I rubbed the side to give it a clean, and a genie appeared in a puff of smoke
"I'll grant you any wish for releasing me from the lamp!" he boomed.
I looked up and noticed a passenger jet in the sky. In need of a holiday, I said "I wish I was on that plane."
With a whoosh, my wish was granted.
Ten minutes later, I landed at Birmingham Airport.
Me and the Devil
I was in church one Sunday when suddenly there was a flash of light, a puff of smoke, and the stench of sulphur. When the smoke cleared, there was the Devil standing in our midst. Everyone ran for the doors, but I just stayed in my seat.
The Devil said, "You know who I am, boy?"
"Yeah, i know you by your stink "
"Then why aren't you afraid of me?
I said, "s**..., i been married to you sister for 30 years."
A Blonde, A Brunette and an Asian were stuck on an Island...
and a genie came out and said, "each one of you have to tell me a truth, if you lie, I will make you disappear!"
The Asian proceeded to say, "I think I am the prettiest girl in the whole world!"
Puff! She disappeared.
The Brunette then said, "I think I am the prettiest girl in the whole world!"
Puff! She disappeared.
The Blonde, having witnessed this, got scared and nervously said, "I think..."
Puff!
Death comes upon you. What do you tell him?
A man is wandering through a film studio, when he suddenly hears a loud crack. He looks up, and almost in slow motion, he sees a giant set piece falling towards him.
With a silent puff, the Grim Reaper appears beside him. In a panic, he points and shouts:
"Sean Bean is over there! "
Inspired by a battlenet forum post for Hearthstone :)
I used to hide my ex-girlfriend's asthma inhaler...
Because my neighbors thought i was a total stallion. They used to hear her all night... *HUFF PUFF WHEEZE* "GIVE IT TO ME!" *HUFF PUFF WHEEZE* "GIVE IT TO ME!"
Boom.
What did the puffer fish say to the sea anemone?
Stop being so closed off.
The Magic Mirror
In this public toilet, there's this magic mirror. Whenever you say something untruthful you disappear.
A red head walks into the toilets and says "I think I have the best legs in the world" and puff...she's gone.
Next a brunette walks into the toilets and says "I think I have the most sexist eyes" and puff...she's gone
Finally a blonde walks into the toilets and says "I think..." and puff she's gone! Hope u like it :D, at ten likes i'll do another
