Puddle Jokes
44 puddle jokes and hilarious puddle puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about puddle that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Discover the funniest puddle jokes! From jokes about puddle pirates to tattered pond creatures, these gags will leave you in stitches. Even the manhole creatures at the bottom of the puddle are in on the fun. Read this article for some laughs!
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Funniest Puddle Short Jokes
Short puddle jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The puddle humour may include short pudding jokes also.
- Can I sell kayak equipment if my dog peed on it? Can I peddle a paddle if it's in a puddle of poodle piddle?
- You can determine the gender of an ant by throwing it in a puddle of water If it sinks it's a girl ant, but if it floats it's a boy ant
- A guy found his dog lying in a puddle of blood behind his house He rang the number for the emergency animal rescue.
'Is it moving?' they asked.
'Yes', he replied. 'It's quite emotional.' - My Vietnamese coworker slipped and fell in a puddle of oil. I was going to make a racist joke about it but decided against it, because that's a slippery slope.
- Bob was a great guitarist Until the day he stepped in a puddle while playing his Fender Strat, that was the moment he became a great conductor.
- I was afraid that I had stepped on my child's hamster this morning... ... but laughed when I double checked. I had just tripped on a little puddle of blood and fur.
- What do you call a dirty puddle on a slab of cold concrete in dim, gloomy light? A sunny day in Seattle.
- My friend was a pretty good guitarist But that one time he stepped in a puddle while playing his electric guitar on an old, badly grounded amp, he became a great conductor.
- I always found the "Dead man and a puddle of water" riddle to be completely unrealistic. Noone would hang themselves standing on a block of ice. They would get cold feet!
- Yo Momma's so poor I stepped in a puddle, and her head popped out and said, "WHAT ARE YOU DOINF IN MY BATHTUB!?"
Share These Puddle Jokes With Friends
Puddle One Liners
Which puddle one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with puddle? I can suggest the ones about flood and puke.
- A depressed shirt falls into a puddle. "I guess I'll go hang myself."
- A guy fell in a puddle Everybody was laughing but i have a dry sense of humor
- What do you get when you hit a poodle with a bulldozer? A puddle
- Why do black people have such flat noses? So they can drink of out puddles.
- What do you call a snowman in July? A puddle.
- Two Horses Fall into a Puddle.... Three Come Out.
- R.I.P puddles in the sunlight. You will be mist.
- Why do storm trooper bathrooms always have puddles? They always miss!
- This one is about a horse a horse steps in a puddle of mud
- What do you call a wet poodle A puddle
- what do you call a snowman with a sun tan? a puddle.
- What did the puddle of pee say to the guy standing in the puddle of pee? u**... u**...
- I had a w**.... I thought I was a puddle.
Mud Puddle Jokes
Here is a list of funny mud puddle jokes and even better mud puddle puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why did the chicken cross the road... to get to the other side. Why did the chicken cross the road again and step in a puddle of mud.... Because he is a dirty double crosser.
- Do you want to hear a dirty joke? One day, two white horses were going around the plains, then they fell into a mud puddle.
- What do you call Raggedy Ann, in a puddle of mud, with a stone in her mouth? A dirty cotton rock s**....
Great Puddle Jokes to Share, Laugh and Enjoy with Friends
What funny jokes about puddle you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean poodle jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make puddle pranks.
For cake day, I wanted to share my grandpa's favorite joke when I was growing up: Wanna hear a dirty joke?
-A man fell in a mud puddle.
Wanna hear a clean joke?
-The man took a bath with bubbles.
Wanna hear a dirtier joke?
-Bubbles was the woman next door.
The rain was pouring and there was a big puddle in front of the pub.
A ragged old man was standing there with a rod and hanging a string into the puddle.
A curious gentleman came over and asked what he was doing. "Fishing", the old man said simply. "Poor old fool", the gentleman thought, and he invited the ragged old man to a drink in the pub.
He felt he should start some conversation while they were sipping their whiskey, so he asked the old man, "and how many have you caught?"
"You're the eighth", the old man answered.
A guy walking into a bar
sees an old man fishing in a puddle off the sidewalk.
Poor Old fool, he thought. So he invited the old man inside for a drink. As they sipped their whiskeys, the gentleman thought he'd humor the old man and asked, So how many have you caught today?
The old man replied, You're the eighth.
"Poor Old fool thought the well-dressed gentleman as he watched an old man fish in a puddle outside a pub…
So he invited the old man inside for a drink. As they sipped their whiskeys, the gentleman thought he'd humor the old man and asked, So how many have you caught today?
The old man replied, You're the eighth.
A rich, young man walks into a bar.
He sits down and orders a few drinks. As he is enjoying his beer, he sees a mentally r**... man outside the building.
Poor Old fool, thought the well-dressed gentleman as he watched the old man fish in a puddle outside a pub. So he invited the old man inside for a drink. As they sipped their whiskeys, the gentleman thought he'd humor the old man and asked, So how many have you caught today?
The old man replied, You're the eighth.
A lion is drinking from a puddle and his tail is up.
A gorilla walks up behind him, seizes the opportunity and has his way with him.
The gorilla takes off and the lion takes off after him. The gorilla runs into a hunter's camp, jumps into a tent, puts on a safari outfit and a pith helmet, grabs a copy of The Johannesburg Times, sits down and pretends to read.
The lion runs into the camp, sticks his head into the tent and roars, "Arrgg! Did a gorilla come through here?"
The gorilla says, "You mean the one that nailed you from behind?"
The lion says, "You mean it's in the paper already?"
It was raining hard...
...and a big puddle had formed in front of an Irish pub.
An old man stood by the puddle holding a stick with a string on the end and jiggled it up and down in the puddle.
A curious gentleman asked what he was doing.
"Fishing," replied the old man.
'Poor old fool,' thought the gentleman. So he invited him into the pub for a drink.
Just to start a conversation while they sipped their whisky, the gentleman asked, 'And so how many have you caught?'
"You're the eighth."
A man is walking into a bar.
He passes an old, homeless man fishing in a puddle in the parking lot. He says, "you look like you could use a drink, come on in."
They sit down to a beer and shot of whiskey each. The man tries to make smalltalk with the homeless fisherman.
"catch anything yet?"
"you're the eighth."
A priest and a rabbi
are walking down the street when they notice a little boy playing on a puddle.
The priest turns to the rabbi and says, "hey, let's go screw that kid!". To which the rabbi replies, "outta what?!"
How do you escape from a windowless bunker with a sealed vault door using only a rubber band and a puddle of water?
1).Look into the puddle and see what you saw.
2). Pick up the saw and cut the rubber band in half
3).Pick up the 2 halves of the rubber band.
4). 1 half plus 1 half equals 1 whole.
5). Use the whole on the door and escape.
A man is walking home around midnight
‟Poor Old fool, thought the well-dressed gentleman as he watched an old man fish in a puddle outside a pub. So he invited the old man inside for a drink. As they sipped their whiskeys, the gentlman thought he'd humor the old man and asked, ‟So how many have you caught today?
The old man replied, ‟You are the eighth.
I was out mowing my lawn...
I was out mowing my lawn. When I had to stop and refill the mower with gasoline.
The gas can broke and spilled gasoline into a puddle. I went to get some absorbent to clean up the mess but found the local stray cat had lapped up all that spilled gasoline.
I tried catch it, but it went racing around the block, then back into my yard and right up my tallest tree. Then fell right off the top of the tree.
Feeling bad I took the cat to the vet, the doctor gave the cat an exam and I finally asked, "Is the cat alright?"
The doctor replied, "the cat is fine, it just ran out of gas."
