Public Jokes

Funniest Public Short Jokes

Short public jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The public humour may include short private jokes also.

1. Antiwork did an interview on fox News to try to create a good public image of their sub It didn't work.
2. Cardi B's sister used to spy for the Russian government, but refuses to talk about it publicly They call her 'Cagey B'
3. Some friends wanted to get married at the public library, but they couldn't... Because it was booked.
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   \-My pop
4. President Trump's doctor is telling the public to prepare for the worst.... A full recovery
5. This hating of people that breastfeed in public really has to stop. I can raise my cat any way I want.
6. Two clowns are running for public office... It's funny for me though because I live in Canada.
7. I played "My Heart Will Go On" on a public piano and people yelled at me. Can't wait till this cruise is over.
8. Students at M.I.T. recently developed a new contender for the blackest material known to man... Scientists attempted to demonstrate it in public, but it was immediately shot by the police.
9. A guy in a public place, phone out, camera on... He approaches a young woman. "What are you doing, creep?" she says. He glances up, smiles, and says "Calm down. I'm just trying to get a Pikachu."
10. I went with my kids for a swim in the public kids pool and apparently adults peeing in a pool is not entirely unnoticeable The lifeguard yelled so loud at me I almost fell in the water.

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Public One Liners

Which public one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with public? I can suggest the ones about official and published.

1. What do you call a thief who keeps the things he stole on public display? British
2. Kid: "Mom, am I ugly?" Mom: "I told you not to call me mom in public."
3. A cat gives birth in a public park... ...and is fined $50 for littering.
4. I used to be a lifeguard at a public pool.... Until this blue kid got me fired.
5. Breastfeeding in public is natural. And it strengthens the bond between me and my dog.
6. What do you call someone who never farts in public? A PRIVATE TUTOR
7. I can't go in public without people staring at my body Now I just leave her at home
8. I once saw a skit about public hanging It had brilliant execution.
9. Have you ever seen a blind person reading braille in public? Neither have they
10. Why was the public masturbator released? he got off in court
11. Why don't ghosts go out in public? Because they look like sheet
12. I've been accused of objectifying women public class Woman extends Person {
13. If i create a Java class public Class Woman{} Am I objectifying women?
14. How do you call a public speaker in Russia? Dead
15. Which superhero loves to whip out his junk in public? The Flash

Public School Jokes

Here is a list of funny public school jokes and even better public school puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• social distancing is great, public school shootings are down 100% Unfortunately home school shootings are up 100%
• Prayer has no place in the public schools just like facts have no place in organized religion
• How many public school teachers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Whatever it says in the book.
• Why won't you ever find Harry, Hermione or Ron crying in front of the rest of the school? Cuz, they belong to the bravest house.
  They don't cry publicly; they Grief-indoor.
• What can you say at Mr. Olympia and a public school? Welcome to the gun show
• I played the USSR anthem at my private school And now its a public school.
• The American public school system Personally, I wish I didn't get it.
• I was taught that socialism was bad. At a public school.
• American Public Schools.
• What's that place called where delinquents are forced to go for several years that has walls and guards with guns? Oh ya! Public school.

Public Transportation Jokes

Here is a list of funny public transportation jokes and even better public transportation puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• LPT: If you know somebody with dyslexia that uses public transport, offer to help them read their timetable to prevent any mixups. Whoops, wrong bus.
• Who do Egyptians pray to when the public transportation breaks down? Anubis
  (If you don't get it, say it slower.)
• A dyslexic tries to use public transportation Whoops, wrong sub.
• So my dyslexia makes it hard for me to take public transportation and... ...oops. Sorry. Wrong bus.
• Did you know that every car going to and from the church on Sunday is a type of public transportation? They're all Mass transit.
• I love public transport, even though I get excessively sweaty. Also, I think I take my Train Simulation game too seriously.
• Why did they plant trees in Harlem? Public transportation.
• How to be Insulting on Public Transportation: Pretend to be foreign when the conductor asks for your fare and try to give him the wrong denomination of money.
• Public transport isn't as depressing as it seems. I was on a bus yesterday at six in the morning... And this really nice guy offered me a sip from his can of cider.
• As a dyslexic, I often misread numbers on public transport and get home late Whoops, wrong bus

Public Speaking Jokes

Here is a list of funny public speaking jokes and even better public speaking puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I was trying to get over my fear of public speaking at a nudist colony. I just imagined everyone with their clothes on.
• Did you know there are public speaking potatoes? Nothing special really, they're just commentaters.
• I was going to give a public address but I lost my speaking notes I was speechless!
• Today I conquered my fear of public speaking and gave a rousing, powerful speech about how nobody likes a quitter. ...aaaand they kicked me out of the 12-step program.
• I took a public speaking class in college. I did a presentation about Free Speech. It was mostly just about the website where I downloaded my speech.
• The most important element of public speaking? Podium
• Have you heard about the judge who left his job to become a public speaking instructor? He progressed from reading sentences to entire paragraphs.
• The human brain is a wonderful thing. It starts working the moment you are born, and never stops until you stand up to speak in public.
• The reason only mostly out of work Hollywood celebrities can speak publicly for Trump is because if any working celebrities did they would quickly become a mostly out of work Hollywood celebrity.
• If you have trouble speaking in public, imagine your audience in their underwear Doesn't work too well when you're a kindergarten teacher, though

Public Urination Jokes

Here is a list of funny public urination jokes and even better public urination puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• How do you get in the 'Public Urination Club'? Walk up to the nearest police officer and you're in.
• A man goes to court for public urination. The judge asks him, "How do you plea?"
  The man replies, "standing up, your honor."
• How do you know the guy leaving the public urinals is a blonde? He's eating pink marshmallows.

Public Health Jokes

Here is a list of funny public health jokes and even better public health puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Smoking seriously harms you and others around you So smoke casually for the sake of public health
• It's good that it's called 'public health England' (PHE) Because 'public health Uk' wouldn't work so well
• Donald trump said he cares more about the health and safety of the American public than he does about money. Well *I* laughed when he said it.
• I saw a poster today for a free concert for those working in public health. It said 'Frontline Only'. Weird. I would've thought they'd fill the whole venue.
• What good did the Trump administration do for the American public? Public health.
  With all the marches Trump triggers, the average American person has never been more fit

Cheerful Fun Public Jokes for Lovely Laughter

What funny jokes about public you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean personal jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make public pranks.