The Best 22 Psychologists Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Psychologists jokes. There are some psychologists psychiatrist jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these psychologists marquee puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 of the Funniest Psychologists Jokes and Puns
How many Psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one. But the light bulb has to want to change.
A guy wraps himself in plastic wrap
A guy wraps himself in plastic wrap, no clothes or anything and walks into a psychologists office.
The first thing she says is, "I can see your nuts."
Two behavioral psychologists were lying in bed after sex
One says the other, "So it was good for you, was it good for me?"
Man walks into a psychologists office and says "Doc. You gotta help Me! I'm having these terrible dreams!"
Doc asks the guy "what happens in these bad dreams?"
The guy says "Sometimes I'm a teepee, then I'm a wigwam, then a teepee, then a wigwam, teepee, wigwam, teepee, wigwam. It's all night! I can't take it!"
Doc says "you've got to calm down. You're too tense."
How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but the light bulb should be willing to change.
How many psychologists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Only one, but the lightbulb has to be ready to change.
What do Psychologists say to each other when they meet?
You're fine, how am I?
A Man Sees a Therapist Because He Isn't Getting Enough Sleep
(Go easy on me, I'm new to the sub)
Upon hearing this the therapist asks: "So when was your last sexual encounter?"
Clearly annoyed, the man responds: "Why does everything come back to sex with you psychologists? My sleep has absolutely nothing to do with sex!!"
And the therapist says: "How would YOU know? You're not getting any of either."
How many Freudian psychologists does it take it change a light bulb?
One to hold the ladder and the other to screw ~~your mother~~ it in.
How many psychologists does it take to change a lightbulb?
It doesn't matter. How did that joke make you feel?
Why can't you hear psychologists urinate?
Because the P is silent.
You can explore psychologists verbal reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean psychologists neurologists dad jokes. There are also psychologists puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
A man walks into a psychologists office...
wearing nothing but saran wrap. The psychologist says "It's a good thing you came. I can clearly see your nuts"
How many psychologists does it take to change a lightbulb?
I don't know, but times up, we can discuss it at your next session.
What Christmas song do psychologists sing the most?
Do you hear what I hear?
Why psychologists don't like bondage sex?
-because they only like DSM
I was reading a story the other day about a deranged garbage man running around for years, murdering dozens.
Psychologists said he was a diagnosed Suciopath.
What do psychologists call a bear who likes to eat penguins?
bipolar...
The developmental psychologists got back to us about our son. They said he's smart on paper...
Unfortunately he can't read
Psychologists go ice-skating
(Read in an old magazine)
So this group of psychologists go for ice-skating. Being novices, all of them failed in their first attempt.
I have never seen so many Freudians slip at a time
A Indian Joke about Indian accents
The grammar has been changed to make the joke smaller:
Some psychologists are running a test based on speech patterns. They get three people; an American, an Australian and an Indian, and ask them to say a few sentences with the words: green, pink and yellow.
The American and Australian give pretty normal answers, stuff like I put on my green hat etc. When it gets to the Indian he says "The phone goes green green, I pink up the phone and say yellow?"
Conversation between two psychologists
"I've developed a way to study patience"
"What kind of patients?"
"All of them"
How do French psychologists like their beverages?
froid
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the psychologists freud jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working psychologists psychology piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.