Giggle-Inducing Psychologists Jokes for Joyful Times with Friends
How many Psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one. But the light bulb has to want to change.
Two behavioral psychologists have sex.
When they finish, one says to the other, wow, you really enjoyed that! How was it for me?
A guy wraps himself in plastic wrap
A guy wraps himself in plastic wrap, no clothes or anything and walks into a psychologists office.
The first thing she says is, "I can see your nuts."
Two behavioral psychologists were lying in bed after sex
One says the other, "So it was good for you, was it good for me?"
Man walks into a psychologists office and says "Doc. You gotta help Me! I'm having these terrible dreams!"
Doc asks the guy "what happens in these bad dreams?"
The guy says "Sometimes I'm a teepee, then I'm a wigwam, then a teepee, then a wigwam, teepee, wigwam, teepee, wigwam. It's all night! I can't take it!"
Doc says "you've got to calm down. You're too tense."
How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but the light bulb should be willing to change.
How many psychologists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Only one, but the lightbulb has to be ready to change.
Two psychologists are having sex…
After they finish, one says to the other It was good for you. How was it for me?
What do Psychologists say to each other when they meet?
You're fine, how am I?
A Man Sees a Therapist Because He Isn't Getting Enough Sleep
(Go easy on me, I'm new to the sub)
Upon hearing this the therapist asks: "So when was your last sexual encounter?"
Clearly annoyed, the man responds: "Why does everything come back to sex with you psychologists? My sleep has absolutely nothing to do with sex!!"
And the therapist says: "How would YOU know? You're not getting any of either."
How many Freudian psychologists does it take it change a light bulb?
One to hold the ladder and the other to screw ~~your mother~~ it in.
You can explore psychologists verbal reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean psychologists neurologists dad jokes. There are also psychologists puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
How many psychologists does it take to change a lightbulb?
It doesn't matter. How did that joke make you feel?
Why can't you hear psychologists urinate?
Because the P is silent.
What do you call a group of communist psychologists passed out drunk?
A collective unconscious.
A man walks into a psychologists office...
wearing nothing but saran wrap. The psychologist says "It's a good thing you came. I can clearly see your nuts"
How many psychologists does it take to change a lightbulb?
None.
***It's the lightbulb that has to want to change…***
How many psychologists does it take to change a lightbulb?
I don't know, but times up, we can discuss it at your next session.
What Christmas song do psychologists sing the most?
Do you hear what I hear?
Why psychologists don't like bondage sex?
-because they only like DSM
I was reading a story the other day about a deranged garbage man running around for years, murdering dozens.
Psychologists said he was a diagnosed Suciopath.
What do psychologists call a bear who likes to eat penguins?
bipolar...
A Indian Joke about Indian accents
The grammar has been changed to make the joke smaller:
Some psychologists are running a test based on speech patterns. They get three people; an American, an Australian and an Indian, and ask them to say a few sentences with the words: green, pink and yellow.
The American and Australian give pretty normal answers, stuff like I put on my green hat etc. When it gets to the Indian he says "The phone goes green green, I pink up the phone and say yellow?"
Conversation between two psychologists
"I've developed a way to study patience"
"What kind of patients?"
"All of them"
The developmental psychologists got back to us about our son. They said he's smart on paper...
Unfortunately he can't read
Psychologists go ice-skating
(Read in an old magazine)
So this group of psychologists go for ice-skating. Being novices, all of them failed in their first attempt.
I have never seen so many Freudians slip at a time
How do French psychologists like their beverages?
froid
