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Psychoanalyst Jokes

9 psychoanalyst jokes and hilarious psychoanalyst puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about psychoanalyst that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.


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Howlingly Hilarious Psychoanalyst Jokes for an Unforgettable Evening

What is a good psychoanalyst joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.

A man with no carnal desires walks into a Freudian psychoanalyst's office

The psychoanalyst stops him and says, "hey, buddy, I'm gonna need to see some id."

How many psychoanalyst does it take to change a lightbulb?

Only one. But, it takes years and years of therapy, and ultimately the lightbulb has to want to change.

Vincent Van Gogh's Relatives

His Obnoxious brother: Please Gogh.
His Dizzy aunt: Verti Gogh.
His prune-loving brother: Gotta Gogh.
His Convenience-Store-Owner cousin: Stop'n'Gogh
His Constipated uncle: Can't Gogh
The Ballroom dancer aunt: Tan Gogh
His Nephew psychoanalyst: E Gogh
His Fruit Loving cousin: Man Gogh
His sister who loves disco: Go Gogh
His bouncy little Nephew: Poe Gogh.

3 Psychoanalysts walk into a bar

Bartender says: we have every beer from around the world. What can I get you fellas?
Sigmund Freud says: I'll have an Austrian lager in a pint glass
Carl Jung says: I'll have a Swiss lager also in a pint glass
Bartender looks at the third guy and says: where you from buddy?
Third guy says proudly: oui oui, I am from France
Bartender: well, a french lager probably like your pals; bottle or a pint?
Jacques says: a lager oui, but do you have it in Lacan?

A psychoanalyst says he thinks he is going crazy

Another psychoanalyst thinks to himself "Im aFreud he is going to commit s**.... He is too Jung to die"

What happened when to the psychoanalyst when he went ice skating for the first time?

A Freudian Slip

Interview for psychoanalyst position

So what would you say is my biggest weakness?

How does a psychoanalyst change a light bulb?

Guiding the light bulb to change by itself.

I'm really worried about my psychoanalyst

He's got a lot of n**... pictures of my mother.

Psychoanalyst joke, I'm really worried about my psychoanalyst


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Psychoanalyst joke, I'm really worried about my psychoanalyst

Psychoanalyst joke, I'm really worried about my psychoanalyst