The Best 26 Psychics Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Psychics jokes. There are some psychics xpost jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these psychics psychokinesis puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Psychics Jokes and Puns

Two psychics pass each other in the street..

One says to the other: "You're doing fine. How am I?"


How many psychics does it take to change a light bulb?

Why did the dyslexic engineer fail college?

Because he didn't understand psychics.

Psychics joke, Why did the dyslexic engineer fail college?

Why aren't there any large psychics?

They're all Mediums.

How do 2 psychics greet each other?

"Hello, how am I?"

"You're fine, how am I?"

I was going to go to the Psychics Conference.

But it was closed due to unforeseen circumstances.

Keep your clairvoyant chipper [OC unless I accidentally stole this]

When I was a single man, I dated a series of psychics. For the first date, I brought a dozen long stem roses, and she said it was too much, and was angry. So for the second psychic, I brought nothing, and she too was offended. For the third psychic, I settled for a single rose, and I finally found a happy medium. (But in the end it didn't work out, she said she couldn't see a future together.)

Psychics joke, Keep your clairvoyant chipper [OC unless I accidentally stole this]

Doubt this is true, but I heard that one of those fraudulent midget psychics who escaped was preggers at the time!

Now there's an extra small medium at large.

What do you call a room full of psychics?

A scam!

Why don't psychics shake gifts from dead people?

They can only feel their presents

What do you call a prostitute that only services psychics?


You can explore psychics mystic reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean psychics clairvoyant dad jokes. There are also psychics puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

I always punch psychics when they smile

Its important to strike a happy medium

My local newspaper ran a story on the decrease of cow psychics.

It was called "Steak Medium Rare"

Why are psychics useful on road trips?

They always read the signs.

Where do psychics go to dance?

The crystal ball

Why do psychics give the best gifts?

Because it's the thought that counts.

Psychics joke, Why do psychics give the best gifts?

9 people claiming to be psychics were arrested by the police

Surprisingly none of them saw it coming.

I had to attend a seminar for psychics and fortune-tellers.

Unfortunately, it has been canceled due to unforeseen circumstances.

Any time I see smiling psychics on TV, I have this uncontrollable urge to slap them in the face.

I guess I'm always willing to strike a happy medium.

Today's meeting for visually impaired psychics

has been cancelled...

due to unforeseen circumstances.

We assure you this issue will be **raised** in our next newsletter.

Two psychics walk into a bar...

You'd think at least one of them would have seen it coming

It's hard for cannibals to catch psychics, but when they do, how do they like them cooked?

Medium rare

Which Psychics enjoy Facebook?

Social Mediums.

When people think psychology deals with psychics


Two Psychics Walked into a Bar...

The second one said, ''I'll have one too.''

The first psychic said, ''I'll have a pint of lager please.''

Unfortunately, this month's Psychics Club meeting is cancelled...

... due to unforeseen circumstances.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the psychics paranormal jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working psychics nihilists piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes