Prove It Jokes

What are some Prove It jokes?

My flat-earther friend decided to walk to the end of the world to prove it's flat!

In the end, he came around.

A paralyzed man says to his friend, Go upstairs and get my shoes. My feet are cold

The friend goes upstairs and sees the paralyzed man's two sexy 17 year old daughters.

He says, Your father sent me up here to have sex with you.

One of the girls replies, That couldn't possibly be true!

The man says I'll prove it and then yells towards the stairs, Both of them?

The paralyzed man yells back Of course both of them!

Bruce Jenner winning woman of the year just proves that men are better than women at everything, including being a woman

Trump's wives were immigrants, proving the adage true...

Immigrants do the jobs Americans don't want to do.

A bank is a place that will lend you money

if you can prove that you don't need it.

A drunk staggers out of a bar and runs right into two priests...

A drunk staggers out of a bar and runs right into two priests. He says, "I'm Jesus Christ." The first priest says, "No, son, you're not." So the drunk says it to the second priest. The second priest says, "No, son, you're not." The drunk says, "Look, I can prove it." He walks back into the bar with the two priests. The bartender takes one look at the drunk and exclaims, "Jesus Christ, you're here again?"

I told my gay friend I could turn fruits into vegetables...

He said "prove it."

So I pushed him off the balcony.

Slip of the Tongue

Joe has a broken leg. Mike comes over and asks, "How you doing', Joe?"

Joe says, "Do me a favor: Run upstairs and get my slippers."

Mike goes upstairs and sees Joe's gorgeous 19-year-old twin daughters. He says, "your dad sent me up here to have sex with both of you."

One girl replies, "Get out of here. Prove it?"

Mike shouts down stairs -, "Hey, Joe, both of 'em?"

Joe shouts back, "of course, both of 'em!" What's the point of fuckin' one?"

A scientist is trying to prove that all blonds are stupid

so he holds an all blond convention and randomly picks someone from the crowd. First he asks her what two plus two is. She answers seven, and the crowd yells, "Give her another chance!". So this time he asks her what ten minus four is. She answers thirteen, and the crowd yells, "Give her another chance!". So this time he asks her what is five times five is. She answers twenty-five, and the crowd yells, "Give her another chance!".

A man wanted to prove to his wife that he loved her more than sex...

so he bought her a lovely bouquet of roses. Despite his good intentions the devoted husband received a suspicious look when he handed her the flowers. I suppose now you expect me to spend the weekend on my back with my legs spread , said the wife. Why? asked the husband, Don't we have a vase?

Female hormones in a beer

Yesterday, scientists in the United States revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones.
To prove their theory, they fed one hundred men twelve pints of beer and observed that 100% of them started talking nonsense and couldn't drive.

Schrodinger's cat was meant to prove how dumb quantum states are, yet it's widely used to advocate and explain it. I bet he's rolling in his grave...

and not

A drunk walks up to two priests.

He says "I'm Jesus Christ." The priest shakes his head. "No son, you're not." The drunk goes up to the second priest. "I'm Jesus Christ."

The second priest gives the same answer.

The drunk glares at them for a second. "Look I can prove it. Follow me." He leads them to a bar and walks inside. The bartender takes one look at him and says "Jesus Christ, you're here again?!"

A guy gets thrown out of a bar.

Two priests approach the guy that was thrown out. He looks at the first priest and says, "I'm Jesus Christ." The first priest shakes his head.

The guy looks at the second priest and says, "I'm Jesus Christ." The second priest also shakes his head.

"Okay, let me prove it to you." The guy walks back into the bar.

The bartender says, "Jesus Christ, you're back already?"

Three priests walk into a bar

and see a man whos already had a few drinks. The man walks up to them and says "you know I'm jesus christ". One of the priests replies "I don't think you are son" so the man says right, I'll prove it to you. He walks out of the bar and a few seconds later comes stumbling back in. The barman sees him and shout "jesus christ not you again"

A drunk walks up to a guy...

A drunk walks up to a guy. says to him, " I am God."

The guy says," Go away, you are drunk."

"I can prove it to you, if you want" said the drunk.

"O really! Then prove it."

The drunk went up to a door and knocked on it thrice, three times. The door opened, and a woman came out,

"Oh God, not you again. Go away!"

I told my chiropractor that my spine was already in alignment, but he proved me wrong.

Now I stand corrected.

A drunk guy walks out of a bar

There's a cop outside who asks him, "What's your name, son?"
The drunk guys answers, "I'm Jesus Christ!"
Cop says, "You are not Jesus Christ. What's your name?"
Drunk guy replies, "I'll prove it. Follow me." The cop follows him back into the bar.
As they enter, the bartender yells, "Jesus Christ! Are you back again?!"
Drunk guys turns to cop and says, "See?"

Flat Earthers

It's funny making a flat earth beliver angry, but if you push them over the edge then you're only proving them right.

Donald Trump is really a proved racist and sexist, because...

He beat a woman badly in his run for the presidency and threw a black family out of a white house...

How do you prove that your dog loves you more than your wife?

Lock them both in the trunk of the car for an hour, then open it up and see which one of them is happier to see you.

I am a professional counterfeiter.

I even have the certificates to prove it.

I can prove getting kicked in the nuts hurts worse than childbirth.

No guy has ever gotten kicked in the nuts, and then a couple years later says, You know, I'd like another one.

Some people say I have my mom's eyes...

but since they can't find them they've never been able to prove it in a court of law.

"Your generation is too reliant on technology," my grandfather said to me.

"No, YOUR generation is too reliant on technology!" I said as I pulled the plug of his life support in order to further prove my point.

got arrested for smuggling books into kentucky

got off on a technicality, no one there could *prove* they were books

A man diagnosed with cancer was given six months to live, but he worked hard and proved them wrong.

He killed himself three hours later.

Caitlyn Jenner won Woman of the Year on 2015

Proving that even when men are women they're better at it than women are.

After 8 years Americans prove the rumor to be false.

They went black and now they are going back.

A man was found dead eight years after committing suicide

Sort of proves his point, doesn't it?

Wanna know how I can prove Jesus was white?

The body of Christ is a cracker.

A mechanical engineer, an electrical engineer, and a civil engineer were having a drink after work

As they drank, the conversation turned to God. Obviously, he was an engineer! But what sort of engineer?

The mechanical engineer brought up the perfection of the human joints and musculature. Surely that proved God was a mechanical engineer!

The electrical engineer responded that, without the brains and nerves, those muscles and joints would be useless. God must be an electrical engineer!

The civil engineer just looked at the two of them and shook his head. "Who else but a civil engineer would put the sewer outflow right in the middle of the entertainment district?"

A cannibal is on trial for murder and cannibalism...

He's called up to the witness stand and the prosecutor asks him if he pleads guilty or innocent.
"Innocent!" he says.
The prosecutor asks him to prove it.
The cannibal answers, "Well, you are what you eat, right? So I am an innocent man!"

How many sheep?

A blonde woman is tired of people assuming she's stupid and dyes her hair red. Feeling empowered, she goes for a car ride down a country road. Soon she sees a farm with hundreds of sheep. She walks up to the owner of the farm and makes this proposal: "These sheep are adorable, if I guess how many there are, can I keep one?" The farmer agrees, surely out of all the sheep this woman can't guess the number exactly. She looks around and replies "There are 593 sheep" The farmer is awe-struck, the number was exactly right. So the woman picks her sheep and is getting back in the car when the farmer runs up to her and yells "WAIT! If I can guess your natural color can I have him back?" The woman smiles and agrees, she already proved she's too smart to be called a blonde. The farmer replies "you're a blonde, now can I have my dog back?"

Philosophy final

in a class for philosophy, the teacher looks at his class, grabs his chair, places it on his desk and tells the entire classroom about his final.

"You have only one question: use your knowledge that I have taught you in this class and prove to me that this chair doesn't exist. You have until the end of class."

Now while everyone else in the class worked on long complicated answers to his problem, one student got up from his desk almost as soon as it begun. The student smiles and hands the teacher his paper and was off.

The teacher, almost sad that the student didn't even try, looked at the sheet of paper and gave the student an "A"

His answer: What chair?

I have the worst dentist in the world.

He even got a little plaque to prove it.

There were once some monks who decided to raise money by opening a flower shop

There was once an order of monks that needed to raise some money. They figured that the best way to do this was by opening a flower shop and selling flowers.

Now, these monks sold their flowers really cheap, and everyone liked the idea of buying flowers from men of God, so much so that all the other florists slowly lost all their business.

Realizing their predicament, the florists banded to figure out how to remove these monks. They finally settled on Big Hugh, the best kneecapper in town. Big Hugh went to the monks and made several casual comments about the flammability of their monastary. Cowed, the monks caved to his demands, thus proving that only Hugh can prevent florist friars.

A young lad enters a barber shop...

and the barber whispers to his customer, This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you.

The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, Which do you want, son?

The boy takes the quarters and leaves.

What did I tell you? said the barber. That kid never learns!

Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store.

Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?

The boy licked his cone and replied,

Because the day I take the dollar, the game is over!

My dad always thought I wasn't man enough to become a fruit farmer...

... I proved him wrong by growing a pear.

Stupid kid

A barber was doing his business and a kid walked in his shop.
The barber told his customer:
- See that kid, he's the stupidest kid I've ever know. Here I'll prove it to you.
The barber yells at kid to come to him so his customer can watch.
The barber pulls out a 2 euro coin and a 5 euro bill and asks the kid:
- Hey kid, what do u choose?
The kid takes the 2 euro coin and leaves. The barber:
- See, I told u. He chooses 2 euro coin every time.
The customer walks out and sees the kid around the corner eating ice-cream.
He approaches the kid and asks:
- Do u not know the difference between a 2 euro coin and a 5 euro bill. Which one is more valuable?
The kid replies:
- I know the difference, but the moment I choose the 5 euro bill, the game is over.

A story about a Redneck and a Game Warden.

A redneck with a bucket full of live fish, was approached recently by a game warden in Georgia as he started to leave a lake well known for it's fish.
The game warden asked the man, "May I see your fishing license please?"
"Naw, sir," replied the redneck. "I don't need none of them there papers. These here are my pet fish."
"Pet fish!?!?"
"Yep. Once a week, I bring these here fish o'mine down to the lake and let 'em swim 'round for a while. Then when I whistle, they swim right back into my net and I take 'em home."
"What a line of baloney....you're under arrest."
The redneck said, "It's the truth, Mr. Gov'ment man.
I'll show ya! We do this all the time!!"
"WE do, now, do WE?" smirked the warden. "PROVE it!"
The redneck released the fish into the lake and stood and waited.
After a few minutes, the warden said, "Well?"
"Well, WHUT?" said the redneck.
The warden asked, "When are you going to call em back?"
"Call who back?"
"The FISH," replied the warden!
"Whut fish?" asked the redneck.

I am a master at forgery

I have all the certificates to prove it

My grandpa's favorite joke

A man runs into a psychiatrist's office exclaiming that he has gone crazy. The psychiatrist asks this random fellow why he thinks he is crazy, to which the man retorts, "I've been wearing cellophane underwear for the past week!" The psychiatrist, in slight disbelief, asks the man to prove it. The man swiftly pulls down his trousers to reveal that he was wearing home-made cellophane underwear. After a moment of examination, the psychiatrist exclaims, "I can clearly see you're nuts!"

A game warden catches an unlicensed fisherman in the act.

"You're going to pay a big fine for all those fish in your bucket"

But, officer, I didn't catch these -- they are my pet fish and I just bring them here to swim. When they're done they jump back into the bucket.

"Oh really? This I've got to see. If you can prove it, I'll let you go."

The fisherman empties the bucket into the lake and waits patiently. A few minutes go by and nothing happens.

Game warden: So where are the fish?

Fisherman: What fish?

Black Stereotype

A black man meets a pretty white girl at a bar. They hit it off through the night get a little drunk and decide to take a cab home together. When the white girl arrived at her stop she asked the black man to come inside. He does and the fun continues.
The white girl is sitting on her couch next to black man running her fingers along his pants and says in a sexy voice "so is it true what they about black men? I want you to prove it to me." the black man says "okay baby you sure your ready for this?" she says yeah excitedly.
He then stabs her and steals her purse.

A performer is traveling to his next show at night...

When he is stopped by a police officer for a surprise car search. The officer finds that the man has an assortment of blades and sharp weapons. He questions the man about them.

Officer: can you explain the weapons in your car?

Man: weapons? I think you mean my props. I'm a juggler you see.

Officer: oh well is that so? Prove it.

The man proceeds to juggle two blades, then three, then four. Just then, a car drives past. The man in the car turns to his wife and says:

Thank God I gave up drinking! Just look at how they're testing people now!

The Drunk says to a priest.....

"I'm Jesus Christ" The priest says "no son, your not" The drunk turns and tells another priest "I'm Jesus Christ " The priest says "no son, your not" So the drunk says " here I'll prove it " The drunk walks into the bar and the bartender says " Jesus Christ, your here again?!"

10 Blondes and a Puzzle Box

One blonde walked into a tavern one day and asked for a table that will sit 10 and a for a pint. She received her beer and a table that would sit 10. Later 2 more blondes walked in and ask for a pint a piece and sat by the blonde from before. More and more blondes came in until 9 sat at the table. The 10th one walked in with child's puzzle box with a huge grin. She asked for a pint, walked to the table and slammed the box into the center of the table. All 10 blondes began to drink hard and chant "51 days!!" The other customers became mad and asked the barkeep to stop their chanting. The barkeep walked up to the blonde that brought the puzzle box and asked, "Before I kick you out, tell me one thing, why are you chanting?" The blonde grinned and said, "Well us blondes have be racially descriminated for so long that my friends and I decided to prove everyone wrong. This puzzle box says 2-4 years and we solved it in 51 days!!"

A policeman searched me last night...

A policeman searched me in a public toilet last night and found a small bag of class A drugs.

"It's not my fault," I said, "Every time I try flushing them down the toilet they magically appear back in my pocket again."

"Do you really expect me to believe that?" he laughed.
I said, "I'll prove it to you if you want me to!"

"Go on then." he smiled, handing me the bag.

After flushing them, he looked at me and said, "Well, show me your pocket then."

"What for?" I asked.

He said, "The drugs."

I said, "What drugs?"

A Frenchman, a German, and an American were regulars at a bar

One day, the Frenchman decides that he is going to prove how much smarter the French are than Germans or Americans. So he goes digging in his backyard and finds traces of copper wiring 15ft deep. He smugly claims, "Ha! 300 years ago, my ancestors had a working telephone system!"

The German, not wanting to be outdone by the French, goes digging in his backyard and finds traces of copper wiring 25ft deep. He smugly claims, "Ha! 400 years ago, my ancestors had a working telephone system!"

The American, not wanting to be outdone by either the German or the French, goes digging in his backyard. He digs all day and night and finds nothing 40ft deep. The next day, he walks into the bar and smugly claims, "Ha! 500 years ago, my ancestors had already gone wireless!"

Shower Sex in Detroit

In a recent survey, people from Detroit have proved to be the most likely to have had sex in the shower.In the survey, carried out for a leading toiletries outfit, 86% of Detroit residents said that they have had, if not enjoyed, sex in the shower. The other 14% said they haven't yet served any time in prison.

The Lone Ranger and his faithful American Indian sidekick Tonto are riding the plains.

The Lone Ranger and his faithful native American sidekick Tonto are riding the plains. It's midwinter and bitterly cold so the heroic duo enter a saloon for a warming drink.

The bartender takes one look at Tonto and shouts: "Get him outtahere. We don' serve no Injuns!"

Faithful Tonto agrees to wait outside while the Lone Ranger has a quick drink. To keep warm he decides to run around his horse.

Alas the drink proved too enticing for the Lone Ranger and poor Tonto was soon forgotten.

Eventually after a few hours, a cowboy sauntered in, looked at the Lone Ranger and said, "Is that your horse outside?"

"Yes, why?" asked the Lone Ranger.

The cowboy answered, "You've left your Injun runnin'."

Did you hear about the guy who tried to prove the Earth was flat by walking to the edge?

He finally came around.

A blonde wants to prove to people that she's not just a dumb blonde.

So she asks her friend, "How could I show people I'm smart?"

Her friend says, "Well- you could start by learning all the provinces and their capitals."

The blonde spends the whole week learning them. It's hard, but she knows it will be worth it when people see how smart she is.

The next week she's at a party and a man asks a question. Full of confidence, the blonde says, "I know the answer!"

The man is sceptical, but she says, "I'll have you know I'm not just a dumb blonde, I know all the provinces and their capitals."

He says, "Okay, what's the capital of Saskatchewan?"

She grins and says, "Easy. S!"

A Barber's Bill

A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer. "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it you." The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?" The boy takes the quarters and leaves. "What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!" Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store. 'Hey, kid! Can I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?' The boy licked his cone and replied, "Because the day I take the dollar, the game is over!"

Pleasing Women

Three women go on vacation to an extravagant resort.
Upon arrival, the manager tells them, "we actually just opened a new building for single women, such as yourself! It has four stories, and you get to choose one of which you will stay in. Each floor has different types of men, and there will be signs at the entrance to each story, telling you what types you will find."

Figuring that it would be a fun adventure, they agree to these terms.

The women get to the first floor of the building. The sign reads "The Men on This Floor are Short, Pale, and Ugly".

Not seeing a reason why they would want to stay there, they proceed to the next floor, where they see a sign that reads "All Men on This Floor Are Average In Every Sense".

They begin to see a trend, and proceed to the next floor, wondering if their luck will improve.

The sign on the third floor reads "All Men on This Floor Are Tall, Dark, and Stunningly Handsome".

The women begin to get excited. They realize that this would be a wonderful floor to stay on, but curiosity gets the best of them, so they press on to the fourth and final floor.

Upon arrival to the last floor, they find a sign that reads
"There are no men on this floor. This floor was built with the sole purpose of proving that there is no way to please a woman."

London Lawyer v Glasgow Cop

A London lawyer runs a stop sign and gets pulled over by a Glasgow copper.

He thinks that he is smarter than the cop because he is a lawyer from London and is certain that he has a better education then any Jock cop. He decides to prove this to himself and have some fun at the Glasgow cop's expense!!

Glasgow cop says, " Licence and registration, please."

London Lawyer says, "What for?"

Glasgow cop says, "Ye didnae come to a complete stop at the stop sign."

London Lawyer says, "I slowed down, and no one was coming."

Glasgow cop says, "Ye still didnae come to a complete stop. Licence and Registration, Please.

London Lawyer says, "What's the difference?"

Glasgow cop says, "The difference is, ye huvte to come to complete stop, that's the law, Licence and registration, please!"

London Lawyer says, "If you can show me the legal difference between slow down and stop, I'll give you my licence and registration; and you give me the ticket. If not, you let me go and don't give me the ticket."

Glasgow cop says, "Sounds fair. Exit your vehicle, sir."

The London Lawyer exits his vehicle.

The Glasgow cop takes out his baton and starts beating the lawyer and says,
"Dae ye want me to stop, or just slow doon?"

/end
This isn't actually illegal in Scotland (beating lawyers, not failing to come to a stop :P ), but the joke is still funny

The man's best friend

You know the phrase "the dog is the man's best friend"?

Well, I can prove it's true!

Just lock up your wife and your dog in the trunk of your car and one hour later... guess who is gonna be happy to see you!!

A priest meets a drunk outside a bar.

The drunk claims to be Jesus, but the priest doesn't believe him. The drunk insists, so the priest demands the drunk prove it. At this, the drunk leads the priest into the bar, upon which the bartender exclaims in disbelief "Jesus Christ, not you again."

A man is getting his haircut at the barbershop...

A kid walks in and the barber says to his customer, "this is the dumbest kid in the world, look I'll prove it to you"

The barber takes out a dollar bill in one hand and 2 quarters in the other and proceeds to ask the kid, "Young man, which of these would you like?"

The kid thinks for a second and then grabs the 2 quarters and leaves.

The barber turns to his customer and says, "See I told you! He is an idiot!"

After leaving the barbershop, the man sees the kid across the street coming out of the ice cream store.

He walks over and asks, "Hey kid, how come you took the quarter and not the dollar?!?"

The kid responds, "Once I take the dollar, that idiot's game will end"

A man brings his talking dog into the bar...

The bartender quickly tells him that no dogs are allowed.

The man says, "But sir, this is a talking dog. If i can prove that he can talk, will you let him stay?"

The bartender reluctantly agrees.

The man looks at his dog and says, "what's on top of your dog house?"

The dog says, "Roof!"

The bartender crosses his arms, annoyed.

The man says, "What does sandpaper feel like?"

The dog says, "Rough!"

The bartender is annoyed, but gives him one more shot.

The man says "Who was the greatest baseball player of all time?"

The dog barks, "Ruth!"

The bartender is furious at the man for trying to trick him and kicks them both out.

The man gets really angry and kicks his dog.

The dog looks up at him and says "what, do you think Sammy Sosa was better?"

Math Joke

The "Salary Theorem" states that "Engineers, scientists, and teachers can never earn as much as business executives and sales people."

This theorem can now be proved by mathematics based on the two postulates:

Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power.

Postulate 2: Time is Money.

As any engineer knows: Power = Work / Time

Since: Knowledge = Power, and Time = Money

Then: Knowledge = Work / Money.

Solving for Money, we get:

Money = Work / Knowledge.

Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity, regardless of the amount of work done.

Conclusion: The less you know, the more you make.

I try not to comment about what is in the news but...

I have seen a lot of hate spewed in recent days about a man who is a constant winner and overachiever, and that's what the people who support him like about him. Yes, he's been caught in some lies and maybe twisted the truth a little but he's still out there proving his haters wrong time after time! Some people are just jealous of someone who is successful and has money. Throw in a hot foreign model at his side and they hate even more. You may not have wanted him in this role, but he's there now and there's nothing you can do about it. I know its just going to get worse over the next several days, but like it or not, Tom Brady is in the Super Bowl.

A new study proves that beavers cause extensive flooding

I've read it. The evidence against them is damning.

A group of friars were behind on their belfry payments.

A group of friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise funds. Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, a rival florist across town thought the competition was unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but they would not. He went back and begged the friars to close. They ignored him. So, the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most vicious thug in town to "persuade" them to close. Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying he'd be back if they didn't close up shop. Terrified, they did so thereby proving that only Hugh can prevent florist friars.

Guy walks into a bar.

Guy walks into a bar.
The bar is empty except for a group of blonde women in the far corner chanting. "23 weeks, 23 weeks, 23 weeks"

The guy asks the barman for a beer and also asks what's all that about in the corner.

Barman says "I have no idea. They've been meeting here every afternoon for the past 23 weeks. They sit silently leaning over the table and never say a word until today."

Intrigued, the man wanders over to the group of woman. They are now hugging each other and shaking each others hands and patting each other on the back. Still chanting "23 weeks, 23 weeks, 23 weeks."

The asks them "what's all the celebrating about?"
One of the woman looks at him and says very proudly "everyone is always saying how blondes are so dumb. Well today we have just proven how intelligent we are."

The man says "well tell me, what have you done to prove blondes are intelligent?"

The woman says "well on the box of this jigsaw puzzle it says 3 years or up, and we just finished the whole puzzle in 23 weeks"

A young boy and a barber

A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you. The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, Which do you want, son? The boy takes the quarters and leaves. What did I tell you? said the barber. That kid never learns! Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store. Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill? The boy licked his cone and replied, Because the day I take the dollar, the game is over!

A young boy walks into a barber shop...

... and the barber whispers to his customer, 'This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you.'

The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, 'Which do you want, son?' The boy takes the quarters and leaves.

'What did I tell you?', said the barber. 'That kid never learns!'

Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store.

'Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?'. Then the boy, licking his cone, replied,

'Because the day I take the dollar, the game is over!'

All blonde women gets together and try to prove that they are smart

So all the blonde women get together and decide that they have to prove that they are smart. They call all the blond women in their town for a convention. They also called news papers and a math professor from a local University. The professor have picked out one blonde and ask her a question in order to prove their smartness. He calls one blonde up to the front and begins.

Professor: What is 150*4?

Blonde: 823

Blonde Crowd: Give her another chance. Give her another Chance.

Professor: Fine. I will make it easier this time. What is 10*10?

Blonde: 28

Blonde Crowd: Give her another chance. Give her another chance.

Professor is frustrated and says: OK. One last time. This is the last try. What is 5+5?

Blonde: 10

Blonde Crowd: Give her another Chance. Give her another chance.

What has 3 words, 8 letters, is easy to say, and hard to prove?

I'm a zebra.

So a man is sitting at a swanky bar on the penthouse of a luxurious skyscraper...

When he turns to the guy next to him and says "You know, way up this high, the air pressure is such that you could jump off the balcony and the wind would push you back up!"
The other man is incredulous, and asks the man to jump and prove it. To this the man says sure, and without hesitation heads over to the balcony and jumps off. Sure enough, a few feet down, he suddenly changes direction and swoops back up on to the balcony.
The man is impressed. "I gotta try this!" he says and leaps off the balcony. He goes straight down, and splats on the pavement below.
The bartender turns to the first man and says "Superman, you sure are a mean drunk."

How to make Prove It jokes?

We have collected gags and puns about Prove It to have fun with. Do you want to stand out in a crowd with a good sense of humour joking about Prove It? If Yes here are a lot more hilarious lines and funny Prove It pick up lines to share with friends.

Joko Jokes