Prove It Jokes
120 prove it jokes and hilarious prove it puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about prove it that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Prove It Short Jokes
Short prove it jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The prove it humour may include short proof jokes also.
- My flat-earther friend decided to walk to the end of the world to prove it's flat! In the end, he came around.
- I debated a flat earther once he stormed off saying he'd walk to the edge of the earth to prove me wrong.
He'll come around, eventually. - Bruce Jenner winning woman of the year just proves that men are better than women at everything, including being a woman
- Trump's wives were immigrants, proving the adage true... Immigrants do the jobs Americans don't want to do.
- I told my gay friend I could turn fruits into vegetables... He said "prove it."
So I pushed him off the balcony. - I debated a flat earther once. He got so mad he stormed off saying he would walk to the edge of the earth to prove me wrong. He'll come around eventually.
- I had a debate with a flat earther. He said he'll walk to the edge of the earth to prove me wrong. I'm sure he'll come around.
- Schrodinger's cat was meant to prove how dumb quantum states are, yet it's widely used to advocate and explain it. I bet he's rolling in his grave... and not
- Let's all take a moment to Thank Amber Heard's team of Lawyers for their efforts and hard work to prove Johnny Depp's innocence.
- I'm in love with a philosophy major, and she doesn't even know I exist and worse… she can prove it.
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Prove It One Liners
Which prove it one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with prove it? I can suggest the ones about prove and admit it.
- A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.
- My wife says I can't solve my own problems How do I prove her wrong?
- Turkey cross the road Why did the turkey cross the road?
To prove he wasn't chicken. - I am a professional counterfeiter. I even have the certificates to prove it.
- Why did the turkey cross the road? To prove it wasn't chicken.
- Why did the turkey cross the road twice? To prove to everyone he wasn't chicken
- I have the worst dentist in the world. He even got a little plaque to prove it.
- I am a master at forgery I have all the certificates to prove it
- What has 3 words, 8 letters, is easy to say, and hard to prove? I'm a zebra.
- My physics teacher said I have potential... He threw me off a building to prove it.
- I can prove that primates don't exist... Eight divides evenly by 2 or 4.
- People with bad teeth are the real winners They even have the plaque to prove it
- How do you prove human beings are inherently curious?
- I'll prove I'm not a procrastinator...
- Why did Joe Rogan take ivermectin? To prove the neigh sayers wrong.
Comedy Prove It Jokes to Make Your Friends Giggle
What funny jokes about prove it you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean have faith jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make prove it pranks.
A paralyzed man says to his friend, Go upstairs and get my shoes. My feet are cold
The friend goes upstairs and sees the paralyzed man's two s**... 17 year old daughters.
He says, Your father sent me up here to have s**... with you.
One of the girls replies, That couldn't possibly be true!
The man says I'll prove it and then yells towards the stairs, Both of them?
The paralyzed man yells back Of course both of them!
A circus performer is driving home after a long day of training, when he is pulled over by a police officer for a broken light.
The officer looks in the car and sees a collection of knives in the backseat.
Sir, he says, Why do you have all those knives?
They're for my juggling act, the circus performer replies.
I don't believe you, says the cop. Prove it. So the performer gets out of his car and begins juggling the knives flawlessly.
Just at that moment, a car with two guys in it drives by. "Wow, says one to the other. I'm glad I quit drinking. These new sobriety tests are hard.
A drunk walks up to two priests...
A drunk walks up to two priests...
He says "I'm Jesus Christ."
The priest shakes his head. "No son, you're not."
The drunk goes up to the second priest. "I'm Jesus Christ."
The second priest gives the same answer.
The drunk glares at them for a second. "Look I can prove it. Follow me." ....
He leads them to a bar and walks inside.
The bartender takes one look at him and says, "Jesus Christ, you're here AGAIN?!"
A drunk staggers out of a bar and runs right into two priests...
A drunk staggers out of a bar and runs right into two priests. He says, "I'm Jesus Christ." The first priest says, "No, son, you're not." So the drunk says it to the second priest. The second priest says, "No, son, you're not." The drunk says, "Look, I can prove it." He walks back into the bar with the two priests. The bartender takes one look at the drunk and exclaims, "Jesus Christ, you're here again?"
A drunk man
A drunk man stumbles out of bar and runs into 2 priest. The drunk man looks at the 1st priest and says,
"Hey, I'm Jesus Christ."
The 1st priest tells the man, "No, my son, you're not."
Then the man turns to the 2nd priest and says the same thing. "Hey, I'm Jesus Christ."
The 2nd priest tells the man, "No, my son, you're not."
The drunk man tells the priests that he can prove it. So he takes the 2 priests into the bar and the bartender says,
"Jesus Christ. You're back again?"
Slip of the Tongue
Joe has a broken leg. Mike comes over and asks, "How you doing', Joe?"
Joe says, "Do me a favor: Run upstairs and get my slippers."
Mike goes upstairs and sees Joe's gorgeous 19-year-old twin daughters. He says, "your dad sent me up here to have s**... with both of you."
One girl replies, "Get out of here. Prove it?"
Mike shouts down stairs -, "Hey, Joe, both of 'em?"
Joe shouts back, "of course, both of 'em!" What's the point of f**...' one?"
A drunk walks up to two priests.
He says "I'm Jesus Christ." The priest shakes his head. "No son, you're not." The drunk goes up to the second priest. "I'm Jesus Christ."
The second priest gives the same answer.
The drunk glares at them for a second. "Look I can prove it. Follow me." He leads them to a bar and walks inside. The bartender takes one look at him and says "Jesus Christ, you're here again?!"
A guy gets thrown out of a bar.
Two priests approach the guy that was thrown out. He looks at the first priest and says, "I'm Jesus Christ." The first priest shakes his head.
The guy looks at the second priest and says, "I'm Jesus Christ." The second priest also shakes his head.
"Okay, let me prove it to you." The guy walks back into the bar.
The bartender says, "Jesus Christ, you're back already?"
I used to own a racing snail...
It never won though. To improve its performance I removed its shell but, if anything, it made it more sluggish
Three priests walk into a bar
and see a man whos already had a few drinks. The man walks up to them and says "you know I'm jesus christ". One of the priests replies "I don't think you are son" so the man says right, I'll prove it to you. He walks out of the bar and a few seconds later comes stumbling back in. The barman sees him and shout "jesus christ not you again"
A drunk walks up to a guy...
A drunk walks up to a guy. says to him, " I am God."
The guy says," Go away, you are drunk."
"I can prove it to you, if you want" said the drunk.
"O really! Then prove it."
The drunk went up to a door and knocked on it thrice, three times. The door opened, and a woman came out,
"Oh God, not you again. Go away!"
A man and a dog walk into a bar
Both get up on stools and the bartender says "sorry no dogs"
"But my dog can talk"
Bartender: "Prove it"
"Fido, what is the top part of a house called"
Dog: "Roof, roof"
Bartender (annoyed): "You're going to have to do better than that"
"Fido, what is the high grassy part of a golf course called?"
Dog: "Ruff, ruff"
Bartender (more annoyed): "I'll give you one last chance before I throw you out"
"Fido, who is the greatest baseball player of all time"
Dog: "Ruth, ruth"
Bartender throws the both of them out into the street.
Dog: "Maybe I should have said Dimaggio"
A drunk guy walks out of a bar
There's a cop outside who asks him, "What's your name, son?"
The drunk guys answers, "I'm Jesus Christ!"
Cop says, "You are not Jesus Christ. What's your name?"
Drunk guy replies, "I'll prove it. Follow me." The cop follows him back into the bar.
As they enter, the bartender yells, "Jesus Christ! Are you back again?!"
Drunk guys turns to cop and says, "See?"
The consultant dies and goes to heaven
When he meets Peter at the Gate, he protests:
'I am only 53, why did you take me so early?'
'You're 83, Peter replied, it was time.'
'How did you get that number, I know I am 53 and I have my birth certificate to prove it,' the consultant replied.
'We added up your time sheets', Peter said.'
Some people say I have my mom's eyes...
but since they can't find them they've never been able to prove it in a court of law.
A cannibal is on trial for m**... and cannibalism...
He's called up to the witness stand and the prosecutor asks him if he pleads guilty or innocent.
"Innocent!" he says.
The prosecutor asks him to prove it.
The cannibal answers, "Well, you are what you eat, right? So I am an innocent man!"
A story about a r**... and a Game Warden.
A r**... with a bucket full of live fish, was approached recently by a game warden in Georgia as he started to leave a lake well known for it's fish.
The game warden asked the man, "May I see your fishing license please?"
"Naw, sir," replied the r**.... "I don't need none of them there papers. These here are my pet fish."
"Pet fish!?!?"
"Yep. Once a week, I bring these here fish o'mine down to the lake and let 'em swim 'round for a while. Then when I whistle, they swim right back into my net and I take 'em home."
"What a line of baloney....you're under arrest."
The r**... said, "It's the truth, Mr. Gov'ment man.
I'll show ya! We do this all the time!!"
"WE do, now, do WE?" smirked the warden. "PROVE it!"
The r**... released the fish into the lake and stood and waited.
After a few minutes, the warden said, "Well?"
"Well, WHUT?" said the r**....
The warden asked, "When are you going to call em back?"
"Call who back?"
"The FISH," replied the warden!
"Whut fish?" asked the r**....
s**... kid
A barber was doing his business and a kid walked in his shop.
The barber told his customer:
- See that kid, he's the stupidest kid I've ever know. Here I'll prove it to you.
The barber yells at kid to come to him so his customer can watch.
The barber pulls out a 2 euro coin and a 5 euro bill and asks the kid:
- Hey kid, what do u choose?
The kid takes the 2 euro coin and leaves. The barber:
- See, I told u. He chooses 2 euro coin every time.
The customer walks out and sees the kid around the corner eating ice-cream.
He approaches the kid and asks:
- Do u not know the difference between a 2 euro coin and a 5 euro bill. Which one is more valuable?
The kid replies:
- I know the difference, but the moment I choose the 5 euro bill, the game is over.
A group of blonde girls overhear a guy saying that all blondes are dumb
So one of the girls says: "no we're not, we'll prove it!"
The guy: "Ok what's 3 + 2?"
One of the blondes: "7"
After a short silence the rest of the blondes start asking for a second chance.
The guy: "ok you get a second chance, what's 2+4?"
One of the blondes: "6"
After a short silence the rest of the blondes start asking for a second chance.
A young lad enters a barber shop...
and the barber whispers to his customer, This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you.
The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, Which do you want, son?
The boy takes the quarters and leaves.
What did I tell you? said the barber. That kid never learns!
Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store.
Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?
The boy licked his cone and replied,
Because the day I take the dollar, the game is over!
My grandpa's favorite joke
A man runs into a psychiatrist's office exclaiming that he has gone crazy. The psychiatrist asks this random fellow why he thinks he is crazy, to which the man retorts, "I've been wearing cellophane underwear for the past week!" The psychiatrist, in slight disbelief, asks the man to prove it. The man swiftly pulls down his trousers to reveal that he was wearing home-made cellophane underwear. After a moment of examination, the psychiatrist exclaims, "I can clearly see you're nuts!"
The Drunk says to a priest.....
"I'm Jesus Christ" The priest says "no son, your not" The drunk turns and tells another priest "I'm Jesus Christ " The priest says "no son, your not" So the drunk says " here I'll prove it " The drunk walks into the bar and the bartender says " Jesus Christ, your here again?!"
Big Feet
A lady goes into a bar and sees a cowboy with his feet propped up on a table. He has the biggest feet she's ever seen. The woman asks the cowboy if what they say about men with big feet is true. The cowboy replies, "Sure is, why don't you come back to my place and let me prove it?" The woman is curious, so she spends the night with him. When she sees him the next day, she hands the cowboy a $100 bill.
"I'm flattered," he says, blushing. "Nobody has ever paid me for my prowess before." "Well, don't be," the woman replies. "Take this money and go buy yourself some boots that fit!"
The man's best friend
You know the phrase "the dog is the man's best friend"?
Well, I can prove it's true!
Just lock up your wife and your dog in the trunk of your car and one hour later... guess who is gonna be happy to see you!!
A priest meets a drunk outside a bar.
The drunk claims to be Jesus, but the priest doesn't believe him. The drunk insists, so the priest demands the drunk prove it. At this, the drunk leads the priest into the bar, upon which the bartender exclaims in disbelief "Jesus Christ, not you again."
Dave knows everyone joke
Dave was bragging to his boss one day, “You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them.”
Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff, “OK, Dave, how about Tom Cruise?”
“No dramas boss, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it.” So Dave and his boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise’s door, and Tom Cruise shouts,
“Dave! What’s happening? Great to see you! Come on in for a beer!”
Although impressed, Dave’s boss is still skeptical. After they leave Cruise’s house, he tells Dave that he thinks him knowing Cruise was just lucky.
“No, no, just name anyone else,” Dave says.
“President Obama,” his boss quickly retorts.
“Yup,” Dave says, “Old buddies, let’s fly out to Washington,” and off they go.
At the White House, Obama spots Dave on the tour and motions him and his boss over, saying, “Dave, what a surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let’s have a beer first and catch up.”
Well, the boss is very shaken by now but still not totally convinced. After they leave the White House grounds he expresses his doubts to Dave, who again implores him to name anyone else.
“Pope Francis,” his boss replies.
“Sure!” says Dave. “I’ve known the Pope for years.” So off they fly to Rome.
Dave and his boss are assembled with the masses at the Vatican’s St. Peter’s Square when Dave says, “This will never work. I can’t catch the Pope’s eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards so let me just go upstairs and I’ll come out on the balcony with the Pope.” He disappears into the crowd headed towards the Vatican.
Sure enough, half an hour later Dave emerges with the Pope on the balcony, but by the time Dave returns, he finds that his boss has had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics.
Making his way to his boss’ side, Dave asks him, “What happened?”
His boss looks up and says, “It was the final straw… you and the Pope came out on to the balcony and the man next to me said, ‘Who the f**... is that on the balcony with Dave?’
Man with half an orange for a head
A guy walks into a bar. Half of his head is a giant orange. The bartender goes, "OH MY GOD, YOUR HEAD IS A GIANT ORANGE!"
Out of his half-mouth, the guy says, "Yeah, yeah, I know. Pour me a shot and I'll explain."
Confused, the bartender pours the guy a shot. The guy downs it and asks for another, then begins his story:
"When I was a young man I travelled the world: Egypt, China, Arabia, everywhere. One day I found a magic lamp and a genie granted me 3 wishes.
'Really?' I said. 'Anything?'
'Anything,' said the genie.
'Okay,' I said. 'First wish... I wish I had a wallet that always had a thousand dollars in it.'
'Granted,' said the genie."
"Wait, wait," interrupts the bartender. "You don't expect me to believe that?"
"Are you kidding? My head's a fucking orange!" snaps the man with the orange head. But just to prove it, he pulls out a worn wallet and slaps ten $100 notes on the bar. The bartender shuts up and the guy with the orange head continues.
"For my second wish, I asked to be irresistible to women."
"Bullshit," says the bartender.
The guy looks across the bar at a beautiful woman he's never met and says, "Hey, baby, want to go home with me tonight?"
The woman squeals with delight, nods, rushes over, buys him a drink, and hangs off him lovingly. She doesn't even seem to notice that half of his head is a piece of fruit. Awed, the bartender pours another round, and asks in a hushed voice, "So... your face... your head... the third wish?"
The man nods and downs another shot of whiskey.
"What happened?" whispered the bartender, leaning forward.
"For my third wish..." whispers the man. "...I wished... that half of my head... were a giant orange."
Relapse
"Great news, Mr. Oscarson," the psychiatrist reported. "After eighteen months of therapy, I can pronounce you finally and completely cured of your kleptomania. You'll never be trapped by the desire to steal again. "Gee, that's great, Doc," the patient replied."And just to prove it, I want you to stop by Sears on the way home and walk the length of the store.
You'll see - you'll feel no temptation to shoplift whatsoever. "Oh, Doctor, whatever can I do to thank you? "Well," suggested the psychiatrist, "if you DO have a relapse, I could use a new microwave. "
I am God.
A drunk says to stranger I am God and I can prove it to you.
Drunk accompanies him to a house in front of the bar and knocks on the door.
Woman opens the door and says, "Oh my god, you again."
Drunk man says to stranger, "see."
Oldie but goodie
During a job interview, the interviewer asked me if I had any impressive qualities? I said, "Yes, I'm very fast with math!" Suspicious he asked me to prove it. He told me to solve 327x49. I said 34,567! He pulled out his calculator and put it in. With a confused look on his face he says, "That's not even close!" I said, "Yeah, but it was fast though!"
No idea where the original came from but this one gets me every time.
From the AnnCoulter AMA...
Dogs are better than people and I can prove it: Put your ex and your dog in the trunk of your car and drive around like crazy for an hour. Open the trunk. Who's happy to see you?
"The holocaust wasn't that bad"
"The holocaust wasn't *that* bad"
"Of course it was!"
"I'll prove it. I'll kill a million jews and one horse"
"Why the horse?"
"See? Nobody cares about the jews!"
A man thinks that his wife is losing her hearing
He is getting very frustrated with her because of it, but she denies it when he confronts her about it. So one day he decides to set up an experiment to prove it to her.
He takes her out to the field behind their house and he places his wife at 100 yards away from him and shouts Dolores! He waits for her response, but nothing comes.
He moves 50 yards closer and shouts Dolores! Still no response from her.
Finally he moves 5 feet away from her and shouts Dolores!
What?! She cries For the third time WHAT?!?
A blonde says "Not all blondes are s**..., and I can prove it!"
"...Give me any state, and I'll tell you it's capital."
A person yells out, "Missouri!"
"M" replies the blonde.
I told a girl I'm a binary programmer with a multi million salary the other day
And pulled out the stacks of 64 dollars to prove it
I once debated with a flat earther, he got so mad he vowed to walk to the edge of the to prove it.
He'll come round eventually.
A drunken bearded man is stumbling around outside a bar . . .
"I'm Jesus Christ! I am Jesus Christ!" He's yelling. No one bothers with him as he paces around waving his arms. Finally a man walks up, "I'm Jesus Christ" he yells at the man. "Ok" says the man "prove it and I'll give you 10 dollars." So the drunk nods and walks into the bar. "OH JESUS CHRIST!" Says the bartender, "not you again!"
Hacker sent me an email that he has hacked into my computer.
I said "prove it" and he sent me the username and password of my email, bank and social media accounts.
I replied "Thank you, that was the easiest Forgot Password process I have ever come across".
I was once debating a flat earther
He got so mad he stormed off and said *ill go to the edge and prove it!*
He'll come around
The thing with people who are bad at counting calories..
..is that they have the figures to prove it
I have a friend in prison who is very kind.
Someone asked him to donate his eye, he gave it for free. Someone asked for his kidney, he also gave it for free. Another asked for his hands, he gave them both, free of charge.
My good friend was still willing to donate his legs as well but the Warden didn't approve it.
The Warden said, "That's enough! You think I didn't notice that you are trying to escape piece by piece?!"
TIL Steve Irwin was trying to market his own sunblock.
The FDA wouldn't approve it because it didn't protect you against all rays.
I finally convinced mom to watch anime to prove it's not childish and immature at all.
But it's weird to watch h**... with your parents.
Me talking to a potential date. I am 30 years old and have the body of a 18 year old Potential date: Oh yeah? Prove it . Me,
I would but I really don't want to walk over to my freezer right now .
A drunk man is in a bar and claims to be Jesus Christ
"Of course you're not Jesus Christ" answers the barman. The drunk man then says "I'll prove it to you". So the drunk man leaves the bar and comes across a priest. Again, he claims to be Jesus Christ. "No you are not Jesus Christ" answers the priest. "Follow me" answers in the drunk man. So both of them walk back into the bar and as they're entering, the bartender says to the drunk man "Jesus Christ, you're here again?".
A drunk walks into a church.
Drunk: "I'm Jesus Christ!!!"
The pastor stops his sermon and just stares at him.
Drunk: "I'm Jesus Christ!!!"
Pastor: "Sir, you are not Jesus. Can you please leave?"
Drunk: "I am. And I can prove it. Follow me!"
The pastor and some church members follow him. He walks down the street a ways, crosses, and enters a bar. The pastor follows.
Drunk: "HEY EVERYBODY!!!"
Bartender: "Jesus Christ! Are you here again?!"
They say I have my mother's eyes...
But they can't prove it.
I'm 17 and have the body of a 5 year old
My date: prove it
Me: *opens freezer*
A drunk man stumbles out of a bar.
He runs into two priests outside.
He says to the first one, I'm Jesus Christ. Want me to prove it? .
The priest replies no you're not, you're just a drunk man. .
So the drunk man turns to the second priest and says I'm Jesus Christ, want me to prove it? .
And the second priest says go on.
The trio walks back into the bar, and the bartender looks up and says Jesus Christ, you're back again?!
I've never, in my life, lost a pen and I can prove it.
I've got a box where I keep my lost pens and it's empty.
Did I ever tell you the story of when I met the woman with the tightest v**... ever?
She was bragging about it at a bar.
I told her I didn't believe her and to prove it.
She took me to her car and said, "Put a finger in" so I did.
Then she said "Put another finger in" so I did.
Then she said "Put your hand in" so I did.
Then she said "Put your other hand in" so I did that too.
The she said "Now clap" and I said "I CAN'T"
And she said "Tight ain't I ?"
My Brother Said Science Is Better Than Mathematics
I Said "Prove It"
I got arrested for reading a book in Alabama
I got off on a technicality though. Nobody could prove it was a book.
A little boy called Harry hangs out at the local shop.
The shop owner doesnt know why, but the other boys tease him. They say hes slow and to prove it they always give him the choice between a 5$ note and a 1$ note. He always takes the 1$ note because he likes the look more. The owner asks him one day why he always takes the 1$ to which he simply responds: If i took the 5$ one they would stop doing it.
The Pope and Trump are in front of a large crowd
The Pope leaned over to Trump and whispered in his ear, With one wave of my hand everyone in this room will rejoice.
Trump whispered back, Prove it.
So the Pope raised his hand and slapped him.
A grandpa is complaining that their generation relies too much on their technology.
They reply, No, you generation relies too much on technology. And we can prove it.
He replies, What are you talking about? , as they slowly unplug his life support.
2 drunk guys are walking home
Two drunk guys, John and Adam were walking hime from a long day at the pub. The two spot a pile of cow s**... in front of them.
John says, "Is that a pile of cow s**...?"
Adam says, "That's just a pile of mud, idiot. Want me to prove it to you?"
John agrees, and Adam goes over to the pile of s**... and tastes it, the m**....
Adam exclaims, "Holy s**...! It IS cow s**...!"
John, with his high intelligence, goes over too and also has a taste.
"I told you it was cow s**..., good thing we didn't step on it."
My wife thinks I care more about gambling than our kids.
That isn't true at all. I am going to stay in this casino until I win our son's tuition back to prove it.
A Vicar was preaching on the d**... Drink, saying whiskey can kill but water can't.
To prove it he had a glass of each. He dropped a worm into the water and it wiggled about. He dropped a worm into the whiskey.
Stone dead.
A person at the back jumped up shouting, "I'll have the whiskey Vicar! I've been having trouble with worms all my life
My Dad showed me how to make bread, then he wanted me to do it on my own...
While I was kneeding the dough, he said, "This time, I won't tell you what to do next"
I told him, "I don't need you to"
He said, "Prove it"
I put horns on my laptop
to improve it's RAM capability
Republicans run for office by saying the government doesn't work...
Then they get elected and prove it.
Aaron is in geometry class. His teacher is yelling at him because he's wearing AirPods while the teacher is talking. In the middle of his rant, Aaron says You're such a square!
The teacher says prove it .
What did the first vegetable say when asked to prove its sentience?
I think therefore I yam.
Women are evil
And I can prove it
first, we know that any relationship with a woman requires time and money therefore...
Women = time * money
...and as we all know, "time is money":
Time = Money
...and therefore:
Women = Money * Money = (Money)^2
...and because "Money is the root of all evil":
Money = sqrt(evil)
...therefore:
Women = (sqrt[evil])^2
...and we are forced to conclude that:
Women = Evil
I went all around the earth
To prove it was flat
Did you hear about the man who thought s**... was better than logic?
He couldn't prove it
My local Baker says he can bake 20 loaves of bread in one hour with one small oven...
I said prove it.
A Drunkard and The Priests
A drunkard stammers out of a bar and ran into 2 priests. He ran up to them and says, I'm Jesus Christ.
The priests reply No son, you are not.
The drunk says, Look, I can prove it~ and walk back into the bar with the priests. The bartender takes a look at the drunk and exclaim,
Jesus Christ, you are here again?
I thought burying my wurst for a few days would improve its attitude, but it just became a spoiled brat.
I'm sorry. That was completely terrible. I shouldn't have wasted your time.
Jews aren't good with money and I can prove it!
How often do you hear about one bringing home the bacon?
People think I have ADHD and I really don't..
To prove it I'll give you 10 reasons why Football is better than rugby
Three priests walk up to a door at a bar.
When they try to open the door, a very drunk man steps out. He tells each priest that he's Jesus Christ. All of the priests disagree with him, and he tells them, "I can prove it!"
So he walks back into the bar with the three priests, and the bartender says, "Jesus Christ, you're back again?"
