Protested Calling Jokes
53 protested calling jokes and hilarious protested calling puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about protested calling that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Quick Jump To
Funniest Protested Calling Short Jokes
Short protested calling jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The protested calling humour may include short protest jokes also.
- What do you get when a few thousand terrorists take over the Capitol? Excuse me, they are called protesters.
- Why aren't mass protests called weight protests? The situation never has enough gravity to warrant it.
- Protests have erupted in the streets and protestors are throwing pumpkins at police officers They're going to have to call in the National Gourd
- What do you call someone who attends both catholic and protestant church services? They're bisectual
- Did you hear that Republicans finally found an appropriate movement to protest Coronavirus? It's called The No Lives Matter Movement.
- A cop walks into a protest A cop walks into a protest and is immediately called racist.
He says, "I'm not racist! My wife has a black eye!" - What do you call it when all the pieces on the Chess Board go on Strike?? A Piece-ful Protest.
- College professors around the world are protesting people using a precise word meaning exactly for emphasis, and throwing garbage at the floor. It's called the litter-raly
Share These Protested Calling Jokes With Friends
Protested Calling One Liners
Which protested calling one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with protested calling? I can suggest the ones about someone called and lawyer argued.
- What do you call a group of rebellious ants? Protestants
- What do you call it when your intestines start protesting? A bowel movement.
- What do you call a Protestant in Greece? Unorthodox
- What do you call a city filled with protesting geese? Honk Kong
- What are protests by transgender little people called? Microtransactions
- What do you call white riot A protest
- Why do the police prefer Uber? Before protesters were always calling them ACAB.
- What do you call a protestant in love? A Popeless romantic.
- What do you call a section of musicians who refuse to play? A non-violin protest
- What do you call a mob of angry protesters that lost the vote? White Noise
- Why are they called protests? Shouldn't they be called antitests?
- What do you call examination of professional persons? A protest
- What do you call a bunch of liberals protesting the second amendment? Triggered
- What do communist leaders call protesters? Red paint.
- What do you call Squidward's Protest Group in Mexico? Counter-Esp*i*on*a*ge
Amusing & Witty Protested Calling Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun
What funny jokes about protested calling you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean outraged jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make protested calling pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Probably old, but I got it in email and it made me chuckle.
An Irish daughter had not been home for over 5 years. Upon her
return, her father cursed her heavily. "Where have ye been all this
time, child? Why did ye not write to us, not even a line? Why
didn't ye call? Can ye not understand what ye put yer old Mother
through?""
The girl, crying, replied, 'Sniff, sniff... Dad...I became...a p**...."
"Ye what!!? Get outta here, ye shameless harlot! Sinner! You're a
disgrace to this Catholic family."
"OK, Dad, as ye wish. I just came back to give Mum this luxurious
fur coat, title deed to a ten bedroom mansion plus a $2 million savings certificate.
For me little brother, this gold Rolex, And for ye, Daddy, the sparkling new Mercedes Limited Edition convertible that's parked outside, plus a membership to the country club... (takes a breath)... and an
invitation for ye all to spend New Year's Eve on board my new yacht in the Riviera."
"Now what was it ye said ye had become?" asks Dad.
The girl, crying again answered, "Sniff, sniff...a p**..., Daddy!
Sniff, sniff."
"Ye scared me half to death, girl! I thought ye said a Protestant.
Come here and give yer old Dad a hug!!!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An amateur golfer playing in his first tournament
was delighted when a beautiful girl came up to him after the round and suggested he come over for a while. The fellow was a bit embarrassed to explain that he really couldn't stay all night but that he'd be glad to come over for a while. Twenty minutes later they were in he bed making love. When it was over, he got out of bed and started getting dressed.
"Hey," called the girl from beneath the covers, "where do you think you're going? Arnold Palmer wouldn't leave so early."
At that he the golfer stripped off his clothes and jumped on top of her. After they'd made love a second time, he got out of bed and put his pants back on.
"What are you up to?" she called. "Jack Nicklaus wouldn't think of leaving now." So the golfer pulled off his pants and s**... her a third time, and afterward he started to get dressed.
"C'mon, you can't leave yet," protested the girl. "Tiger Woods wouldn't call it a day."
"Lady, would you tell me one thing?" asked the golfer, looking at her very seriously. "What's par for this hole?"
A weak little man applied for a job as a lumberjack...
...but the foreman refused to take him because he was too small. "I may look puny," protested the man, "but I'm not. Just give me a chance to show you my strength."
The foreman consented and told the man to go chop down a giant redwood that stood nearby. Half an hour later, to the foreman's shock, the redwood was lying on the ground.
"Where'd you learn to cut down trees like that?" the foreman asked.
"The Sahara Forest," the man answered.
"You mean the Sahara Desert?" the foreman ventured.
"Sure," said that man, "if that's what they call it now."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Irish p**...- An old joke but still good!
An Irish daughter had not been home for over 5 years. Upon her return, her father cursed her.
Where have ye been all this time? Why did ye not write to us, not even a line? Why didn't ye call? Can ye not understand what ye put yer old mum thru?
The girl, crying, replied, "Sniff, sniff....dad....I became a p**......."
"Ye what!!? Out of here, ye shameless harlot! Sinner! You're a disgrace to this family."
"OK, dad-- as ye wish. I just came back to give mum this luxurious fur coat, title deed to a ten bedroom mansion plus a savings certificate for $5 million."
"For me little brother, this gold Rolex and for ye daddy, the sparkling new Mercedes limited edition convertible that's parked outside plus a membership to the country club....(takes a breath)....and an invitation for ye all to spend New Years' Eve on board my new yacht in the Riviera, and...."
Now what was it ye said ye had become?" says dad.
Girl, crying again, "Sniff, sniff....a p**... dad! Sniff, sniff.
"Oh! Be Jesus! Ye scared me half to death, girl! I thought ye said a Protestant. Come here and give yer old man a hug.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What to Wear
A man, called to an audit by the IRS, asked his accountant for advice on what to wear. 'Wear your shabbiest clothing. Let him think you are a pauper.'
Then he asked his lawyer the same question, but got the opposite advice. 'Do not let them intimidate you. Wear your most elegant suit and tie.'
Confused, the man went to his rabbi, told him of the conflicting advice, and requested some resolution of the dilemma. 'Let me tell you a story,' replied the rabbi. 'A woman, about to be married, asked her mother what to wear on her wedding night. 'Wear a heavy, long, flannel nightgown that goes right up to your neck.' But when she asked her best friend, she got conflicting advice. 'Wear your most s**... negligee, with a V neck right down to your navel.'
The man protested: 'What does all this have to do with my problem with the IRS?' The rabbi responded: "'No matter what you wear, you are going to get s**..."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call 30,000 Muslims who meet to protest ISIS?
A bomb time.
So an atheist man lives in a over conservative Irish neighborhood...
... and calls a cab. The heavily accented cab driver says to him, "Before you get in, I gotta know your religion."
So he replied, "Oh, no, I'm an atheist, actually."
The cab driver stared at him a moment before asking, "Yeah, but is it the Catholic God you don't believe in or the Protestant one?"
One time in medieval England ...
One time in medieval England, there was a Lord who opposed hunting. One day, he issued a verdict that forbade hunting on his land. The peasants were angry, but the economy soon recovered.
But within a few years, wild animals were overpopulating and began traveling into the fields and eating the crops. Peasants once more began to protest, but the Lord ignored them.
Soon, the peasants could not grow food because the animal population was eating everything they planted. A large group stormed the castle, demanding the Lord end the ban, but he refused, and they killed him.
This marked the only time in history that a reign was called because of the game.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a male feminist who pees sitting down to protest gender roles?
A man, duh.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a Protesting Catholic?
A Lutheran!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A farmer's wife is cooking breakfast for the family
The wife serves the farmer's breakfast first, then the farmer's daughter, then a plate for herself, and calls the family down. The farmer's son enters, and sees that he's been given nothing, and he protest, "Where's my eggs? My bacon? My milk?"
The wife replies, "I saw you kick the chickens, earlier so no eggs for a week. I also saw you kick the pig, so no bacon for a week. And I saw you kick the cow, so no milk for a week."
Just then the farmer walks in, k**... the cat as he enters. The boy looks to his mother, "should you tell him or should I?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What are called the private parts of n**... protesters?
Public parts!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
an irish girl confesses shes a p**... to her father
at first he gets s**... angry starts yelling at her, how could she betray him, calls her all kinds of names including soup taker. She looks confused at this and asks her father to accompany her to confession. Her dad stares at her for a moment and then he hugs her, crying tears of relief. The he says, "I thought you said you were a protestant!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My mom's sister got a s**... change and married a white Protestant minister
We now call them Aunt-Man and the wasp.
My daughter just asked me to call her iPad….
My 7 year old daughter was getting ready for bed and was looking for her iPad. Dad, can you call my iPad? She asked me. I was ready for this moment. Without hesitation I replied what do you want me to call it? She looked at me blankly. No…call my iPad she protested. I cupped my hand to my mouth and bellowed Emily's iPad over and over. She finally caught on and we shared a laugh. I called her iPad on my phone, it rang in the other room.