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Prostate Jokes

134 prostate jokes and hilarious prostate puns to laugh out loud. Read human body jokes about prostate that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Prostate jokes often revolve around scenarios that involve doctors and prostate exams. They can sometimes reflect situations dealing with prostate cancer or an enlarged prostate. These jokes aim to lighten the mood around a serious topic and provide a sense of comic relief. However, it should be stressed that prostate jokes, like all humor, are subjective and should be treated with sensitivity, considering the seriousness of the issues they sometimes touch on, such as prostate cancer.

Best Short Prostate Jokes

Short prostate jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The prostate humour may include short bladder jokes also.

  1. During my prostate exam I asked the doctor, "where should I put my pants"? "Over there by mine", was not the answer I was expecting.
  2. After my prostate exam, the doctor left. The nurse came in later, with a worried look on her face, and said the three words I was dreading to hear. Who was that?
  3. I asked the doctor where I should put my pants during my prostate examination. Over there next to mine, was not the answer I was expecting.
  4. After my prostate exam the doctor walked out and the nurse walked in. Then she asked me something no man wants to hear.. Who was that..
  5. I went to the doctor today for a prostate exam. It wasn't as bad as I was expecting, until I realized both his hands were on my shoulders.
  6. I nearly jumped 10 feet in the air during my first prostate exam. Good thing the doctor had both his hands on my shoulders.
  7. "relax, the prostate exam will go easier that way" said the doctor as he put a firm hand on my shoulder. And then he put his other hand on my other shoulder.
  8. I was worried about my prostate exam But luckily my doctor was kind enough to keep his hands on my shoulders the whole time to reassure me.
  9. The doctor asked, how many fingers am I holding up? I said, feels like two. Can you finish the prostate exam please?
  10. Went in for a prostate exam... I asked the doctor where I should put my pants.
    "Right over there with mine"...

Quick Jump To


Prostate joke, Went in for a prostate exam...


Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about prostate can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of prostate puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

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Prostate One Liners

Which prostate one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with prostate? I can suggest the ones about testicular and kidney.

  1. My doctor told me that I had a healthy prostate. I was deeply touched.
  2. What's the worst thing to feel during a prostate exam? 2 hands on your shoulders
  3. I just got my prostate examined. That's the last time I fall asleep on the train.
  4. I just had my first prostate examination Worst dentist ever.
  5. I asked my doctor to use 2 fingers when checking my prostate.. I wanted a second opinion.
  6. My doctor checked my prostate last week It was the worst dentist appointment of my life.
  7. i just got my first prostate exam and im never going back to that dentist again
  8. What type of cancer is an anarchist immune to? Prostate
  9. I went to see my doctor to get my prostate checked. He gave me the thumbs up.
  10. A prostate exam... Is worrying when the doctor shouts "look no hands!"
  11. What do you never want to hear during a prostate exam? Look, no hands.
  12. Look, no hands! The worst thing you could hear during a prostate exam.
  13. I took a prostate exam at home, I think I failed... I lost my pen
  14. What kind of cancer always stands by the government? Pro-state cancer.
  15. What is the worst thing to feel when getting a prostate exam? Two hands on your shoulders

Prostate Exam Jokes

Here is a list of funny prostate exam jokes and even better prostate exam puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I got a prostate exam yesterday and that went pretty smoothly. The doctor had both hands on my shoulders though, so I was a bit confused.
  • Q: When should you worry during a prostate exam? A: When both the doctor's hands are on your shoulders.
  • How do you know that the prostate exam is going horribly wrong? When the doctor places both hands on your shoulders.
  • I had my prostate exam yesterday. It's the last time I will ever fall asleep on the subway.
  • A man goes for his first prostate exam "I am sorry doctor, but where can I leave my pants?"
    "Right there where I left mine" - the doctor says
  • A man is getting a prostate exam... During the exam, the man asks the doctor, "Is there anything I should be worrying about?"
    The doctor says, "Only if you can feel both my hands on your shoulders."
  • My doctor has the best bedside manner. During my last prostate exam, he kept me calm by putting both of his hands on my shoulders
  • I always assumed you took off your pants during a prostate exam But apparently that's "not appropriate for a medical professional".
  • I was getting a prostate exam and asked my doctor where I should put my pants He said "in the corner, next to mine."
  • After the doctor left the room from my prostate exam, the nurse came in with three words I didn't want to hear. "Who was that?"

Prostate Check Jokes

Here is a list of funny prostate check jokes and even better prostate check puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • The doctor who checked my prostate looked like he spent five days a week at the gym. So I asked him what the weather was going to do... ...he was clearly a meaty urologist.
  • I have the best proctologist. He's able to massage my shoulders and check my prostate at the same time.
  • Went to my doctor today for a check up and afterwards he told me my prostate was in peak physical condition.... I thought it was a strange thing for a dermatologist to say but hey good to know
  • Check up time. I've just been for my 6 month check up and everything seem to be going well until he slipped his finger in to check my prostate. I will not be using that dental practise again.
  • That uncomfortable feeling when... You're at the doctors office getting your prostate checked and notice both of the doctor's hands on the table next to yours.
  • My doctor always insists on checking my prostate. Which is weird because he's a psychiatrist.
  • I don't need to pay the doctor for a prostate check up My uncle did it for free
  • I had my prostate checked the other day... He said, "Bad news. You are going have to stop m**...."
    "What?... Permanently?..."
    "No. Just while I am examining you."
  • Prostate exam Patient bent over n**... about to get his prostate checked.
    Dr says "ok Dave don't get a hard on "
    Patient says " my name is Kenneth"
    Dr says " my name is DAVE"
  • Just had my first ever prostate check. My doctor said it's called a digital r**... exam. Felt more like it was a**...-og to me though.

Prostate Cancer Jokes

Here is a list of funny prostate cancer jokes and even better prostate cancer puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What type of cancer do anarchists hate the most? Prostate cancer
  • What do anarchists die of? Pro-state cancer
  • An anarchist and a communist have an argument The communist wins the argument and the anarchist then says, "Thanks for giving me pro-state cancer."
  • Doctor says " Mr Johnson.." Patient replies "Please , call me Ms Johnson" Doctor says "ok Ms Johnson, you have prostate cancer"
  • I have cancer It's such a pain the prostate
  • How can you tell when you have prostate cancer? It's not hard.
  • My friend's Thai wife died yesterday, from prostate cancer.
  • So I got back from the hospital today turns out I have prostate cancer.
  • TIL That I'm NEVER getting prostate cancer
  • how do you know a basketball player has prostate cancer? he dribbles a lot

Enlarged Prostate Jokes

Here is a list of funny enlarged prostate jokes and even better enlarged prostate puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I'm so bad at recording myself playing video games that I've earned the nickname "The Enlarged Prostate"... I guess I've got a weak stream going.
  • When Big Johnny tried to fly without an ID... ...the TSA diagnosed him with an enlarged prostate.
  • I named my enlarged prostate Gandalf Because every time I try to go it shouts "YOU SHALL NOT p**...!"
  • So the Enlarged Prostate and the Bladder are taking. The bladder says " move I gotta pee!" the Enlarged Prostate smiles and says " Sorry but u**... trouble."
Prostate joke, So the Enlarged Prostate and the Bladder are taking.

Gather Around for Fun Prostate Jokes and Laughter with Friends

What funny jokes about prostate you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean urethra jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make prostate prank.

Prostate exam

A man goes to the doctor for a prostate exam. He pulls down his pants and after a while the doctor says "You're gonna have to stop m**...".
The man asks "Why?"
"Because I'm trying to examine you.", replies the doctor.

I saw your post about the prostate exam and ease you this.

When you're getting your prostate exam, make sure the doctor only has ONE hand on your hip...

New Prostate Exam Joke

A man goes to the doctor for his first prostate exam. While the Doctor is performing the exam, he says to the patient, " Don't be embarassed, its common for men to get an e**... during this part of the exam".
The patient answers "I don't have an e**..."
The Doctor replies "I know, I do"

Here's the good news (OC)

A guy goes to the doctor for his regular checkup. The doctor finishes up and invites him into the office.
"So, which first? The bad news or the good news?"
"Good news, doc", says the guy.
To which the doctor replies, "Well, you won't be needing any more annual prostate exams."

"m**... can help relieve depression and lead to a higher sense of self-esteem, as well as reduce the risk of prostate cancer."

And apparently that is not the correct answer to give when being questioned by the police as to why I was jacking off while riding the bus.

My doctor told me to stop m**....

I went to the doctors yesterday and was surprised when he told me i needed to stop m**....
"Why, is my s**... count low?"
"No, you just need to let me finish your prostate exam first."

A man goes to the doctor for a prostate exam.

Midway through, the doctor says, "Don't worry, sir. It's perfectly normal to get an e**... during this procedure."
The man says, "What are you talking about doc? I'm not hard."
"I wasn't talking about you."

Wrong e**....

went to the doctor for a prostate exam....
while examening me the doctor said;"some men can get an e**... during this exam",
i repleyed; "not me"
Doctor;" i wasn't talking about you!"

Erections happen all the time

A man is about to get a prostate exam from his doctor. Before the doctor begins, he tells the man "I must tell you, during this type of examination, erections happen all the time. They are very common, and trust me, it's nothing to be embarrassed about."
The man seems a little uncomfortable, but the doctor continues, "Now a little less common, is you may get one too."

Why do men with prostate issues have issues stealing video game systems?

Because they have trouble taking a Wii.

Prostate Exam

After my recent Prostate Exam - one of the most thorough examinations I've ever had –
the Doctor left the room and the nurse came in.
After she shut the door, she asked me a question I didn't want to hear....
She said...."Who was that guy?"

So I went to the doctor for my annual prostate exam today....

I asked the doctor "Where I should put my pants?"
He replied "Over there next to mine."

What happens to male anarchists as they get older?

They go from having anti-state issues to having prostate issues.

I was so embarrassed when I got an e**... during a prostate exam.

Especially when they found out I'm not even a doctor.

I went to get a prostate exam yesterday...

the doctor told me to get in the fetal position and relax.
"You, know", the doc said after about 30 seconds into the procedure, "it's shouldn't be embarrassing, and it's not uncommon for some men to get an e**... during this procedure."
"I don't have an e**...', I responded.
Doc responded, "Yeah, but I do."

It's awkward when you get an e**... during a prostate exam

And they realize you're not a doctor.

I went to see my Doctor yesterday for a prostate examination...

There was nothing to worry about, he gave me the thumbs up.

When released from prison after 30 years I went for a prostate exam

The doctor said he could just eyeball it.

Two patients are sitting in a waiting room.

One of the patients, who has a speech impairment, asks the other patient,
"H-h-hi t-there. W-w-what are y-you here f-f-for?"
The other replies, "I have an issue with my prostate."
"W-w-what's the p-problem?"
The other answers, "Well, the way you talk is the way I pee."

I went to the doctor today...

He had me take off my clothes and put on a gown so he could complete a full physical. I was worried I would be receiving a prostate exam. Anyways, he walked back in and had me pull my gown up for the ole turn your head and cough check. When I did he took one look at me and said, "Very interesting....You have got to stop m**...." I asked why, he said, "Because I'm trying to examine you."

The worst thing about a prostate exam is...

...when he finds out you're not a real doctor.

During the prostate exam I asked the doctor, "where should I put my pants?"

"Over there by mine", was not the answer I was expecting.
This is a repost from two years ago, all credits to u/-stillborn-

The year is 2017.

There are machines which can look through skin and see bones. There are machines which keep you alive when your brain and heart have stopped. There's even a machine that can tell you who your parents are with a single drop of spit. However, when I need my prostate checking, a man sticks his finger up my a**... and wriggles it about a bit.

gay prostate exam joke

a gay man goes in to get a prostate exam.
he is told to bend over when the doctor starts to examine his prostate.
the man says to the doctor:
"please t**... ring, it's hurting me"
the doctor says:
"That's not my ring. that's my rolex!"

Two guys sitting in a doctor's office waiting room....

First guy says to second guy:
"I ...I...I...I'm hhhhh... hear ....fffffff...for my stttut...stutttering ppp,ppp, problem. Yyyy, you?"
Second guy says:
"I'm here because I have a swollen prostate, gonna get it checked"
First guy says:
"wwwww, what hhhhh, hhhappens wwwheeen y, yoour, ppppp, pprostate swelll, swells?
Second guys says:
"well, basically, I pee like you talk"

Doctor: Its perfectly normal to have an e**... during a prostate exam!

Me: But I don't have one.
Doctor: But I do!!!

I got a prostate exam...

And the doctor told me its normal to get an e**....
So I just ignored his bulge.

I had a prostate exam the other day...

When I entered the examination room and asked the doctor where I should put my trousers, I have to say, "over there with mine" was not the answer I was expecting.

I was having a prostate exam...

Me:*squirms
Doctor: Don't worry, it's perfectly fine to have an e**... at a time like this.
So I tried to ignore the bulge in his pants.

I was getting a prostate examination when the doctor said "just so you know, this is a digital r**... exam".

"I understand. I know what is involved", I reply.
The doctor elaborates, "Just so you know, this exam will likely cause an e**...".
I consider it for a moment and say, "That's fine, I've got it under control. It should be ok".
The doctor replies, "I wasn't talking about you."

I went to get a prostate exam and the doctor told me I need to stop m**......

I asked why?
He said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

During my prostate exam, the doctor told me it was completely normal to get an e**....

When I pointed out I didn't have one he said he wasn't talking about me.

I had a prostate exam today

Doctor felt around and said I had to quit m**.... I asked why? Doctor said so he can finish the exam.

Doctor Visit

After my Prostate Exam, the doctor left. When the nurse came in as she shut the door, she whispered three words no man wants to hear:
Who was that?"

I really should've studied for my prostate exam

my mom freaked out when she found out I got a D.

So I went in for my prostate exam...

The guy put on the glove and started to go up in me. It went on for quite a while. Then, he took off the glove, said to put my pants back on and left the exam room.
A minute later, the nurse came in and said the one thing I didn't want to hear...
"Who was that guy?"

It's Not That I Didn't Like The Prostate Exam,

It's just the way he massages my shoulders while he's doing it.

What do the t**... and prostate have in common?

Nothing. There's a vas deferens between the two.

Before my prostate exam I asked my doctor where to leave my trousers.

"Over here by mine" wasn't the answer I was expecting.

Mondays are like prostate exams...

A pain in the a**..., but at least they only happen once per week.

m**... is perfectly normal and healthy . it releases dopamine and reduces stress . improves prostate and cardiovascular health ...

and i still got thrown off the bus

A man is at a doctor's office about to have his prostate checked.

The doctor says "Okay, Steve, let's not get an e**... again during the procedure." The man looks at the doctor confused, and says "My name isn't Steve, it's Dave." The doctor says "I know. I'm Steve."

Why did the anarchist refuse to put his finger up his a**...?

Because he didn't want to feel prostate.

Free Organic Pathologist Test

Go upto a tree and take a leak:
* If pee attracts ants, you've got diabetes.
* If it dries fast, your sodium is high.
* If it smells like meat, your cholesterol is high.
* If you forgot to unzip, it's Alzheimer's.
* If you missed the tree, Parkinson's.
* If you peed on your shoes, enlarged prostate.
* If you can't smell it, COVID 19.

Clothing optional

I went in for my prostate exam last week. The doctor told me to take off my pants. I asked him where I should put them. Right there next to mine was not the answer I wanted to hear.

What do you call a Southern doctor that specializes in bladders, kidneys, and prostates?

A y'allogist

Prostate joke, What do you call a Southern doctor that specializes in bladders, kidneys, and prostates?

jokes about prostate

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these prostate jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.