The Best 36 Promoted Jokes
Following is our collection of funniest Promoted jokes. There are some promoted agriculture jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these promoted duly puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Funny Promoted Jokes and Puns
Blowing chunks
Two guys are talking and one asks the other, "Hey, you wanna go drinking later, I just got promoted?"
The other replies, "Thanks, but I can't."
"Aw, come one why not?"
"Cause last time I went drinking, I blew chunks."
"That's normal, people vomit after drinking all the time."
"No, you don't understand; Chunks is my dog."
Accidentally wore a red shirt and khaki pants to Target today...
Long story short, I think I got promoted to Assistant Manager.
On the upside, Oscar Pistorus has had his paralympic classification promoted...
...he's gone from T43 (double below knee amputee) all the way up to T800 (The Terminator).
What do you call a Mexican on a riding lawn mower?
Promoted.
Slinging puns at my best friend
So my best friend from high school is a Marine. The other day, he was promoted to Corporal.
So I told him "Treat your privates right. Also, the men under your command, treat them right too."
Why was the hot teacher promoted to principal?
Because she was the Headmaster!
My first submitted joke :)
The manager of my power drill company was doing so well I promoted him to head of the cement mixer division.
One good turn deserves another.
That kid didn't really find a lost Mayan city. The sites that promoted the story?
I guess they'll issue a...
Maya culpa.
'C' has just been promoted to the second letter of the alphabet!
However R & D believe the rise in C levels will result in a loss of B's.
How can you tell Cap'n Crunch is terrible?
He hasn't been promoted since 1963...
I recently got promoted to Supervisor at my place of work..
It's hard work, but I manage.
You can explore promoted promotion reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean promoted personnel dad jokes. There are also promoted puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
I'm moving up in my job as a bike mechanic
I've been promoted to spokesperson
Legolas was promoted at his new job
to Head of the Department of Elf and Human Services
My boss promoted me to the role of pilot in command...
He said I was going places.
The National Guillotine Convention promoted me
I'm now the head
What's the gadget apple promoted as innovative and cheap?
The iLied.
I got promoted to the senior supervisor at the cheese factory.
I am now the greater grater grader.
Did you hear about the Mexican who got promoted?
I wasn't really surprised honestly. He does have the most señor-ity.
A pirate named Ronny gets promoted to First Mate.
Ronny is pondering life one day as hes giving the captain a shave.
"I'm not a very good pirate," he says to the captain. "I can't navigate and I don't know how to fight. I don't even sound like a pirate. Is there a reason you chose me as first mate?"
"Aye Ronny," says the captain.
What do you call a hood guy that just got promoted?
Maneger
Charon hasn't been promoted for millenia, his job isn't that good.
He styx with it though.
I spent 15 years suffering from chronic procrastination....
And I still can't decide if I prefer sativa or indica.
P.s I am getting really annoyed by that persistent promoted post!
My grandmother didn't approve of me working at the nudist tennis club.
But you should have seen her face when I told her I'd been promoted from ball boy to head of staff.
I finally got promoted at the crematorium
What can I say, I urned it.
I should have known my ex-wife's activism would be a problem for our marriage.
She promoted the de-nuclearization of families.
HR Department
"I proposed to my girl friend last night, who just got promoted to a HR position earlier in the day."
"That is cool! What did she say?"
She said, "We will get back to you soon."
I was fired by my boss even though I was given a promotion.
He told me "You've been promoted to customer."
Col Repo was promoted and awarded a new wardrobe with his new position in the military.
That's right, somewhere out there is a cardboard box just full to the brim of General Repo's T's.
Communists should love President Trump...
I mean, what other President has promoted the 2-hour work week like him?
How did the flu become so popular?
They promoted it using an influenza.
I have been climbing up the corporate ladder in my job at the bike factory.
I was just promoted to be the spokesperson.
Why was the boxcar so proud of being promoted to engine?
He trained his entire life for it.
My boss walked up to me and said "Congrats, you've been promoted to manager." "Cool, who do I manage now?" I asked.
"Yourself."
I'm starting a protest against the evil capitalist structure promoted by Vietnamese soup salesmen.
We are Anti-Pho
Why was the scarecrow promoted?
He was outstanding in his field.
Three men are talking in a Soviet gulag.
One of them asks the two others: "So what did you do?"
The first one answers: "Well, I arrived late at the factory, and so they accused me of slowing down the Revolution and the victory of the Proletariat."
The second one answers: "Well, I arrived early at the factory, and so they accused me of wanting to be favored and promoted over my fellow workers."
Then they turn to the one who asked the question: "How about you, then?"
"Well, I arrived at the factory right on time, and so they accused me of having a watch from the West."
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the promoted advertise jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working promoted vacancy piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.