Profitable Jokes
27 profitable jokes and hilarious profitable puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about profitable that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Profitable Short Jokes
Short profitable jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The profitable humour may include short valuable jokes also.
- So many Christians run non-profit organizations. On the other hand, atheists... ...only run non-prophet organizations.
- The pros and cons of being overly literal PROS:
People who profit as a result of their occupation.
CONS:
People found guilty of a criminal offense. - Indian restaurants make most of their money off of the bread.. They're naan-profit organizations.
- So my oilfield is haunted, turned out quite profitable... Now I can sell Super-Natural Gas!
- I hear most Muslims are capitalists... They're always going on and on about some Great Profit.
- Did you know that Indian Restaurants make most of their money on their flatbread? They're naan-profit organizations.
- A man was arrested for killing gang members, then cutting off their feet and taking them When apprehended, the man said he had heard it was profitable to sell Crip toes.
- An Englishman starts his own business in Afganistan He is making land mines that look like prayer mats! He is doing quite well! Profits are going through the roof!
- Since chipotle charges like a $1.30 for guacamole... I wonder if In their bussiness meetings, if they refer to their guac profits as
Avacadough - Petty Cash I place $20 in a box.
So do you.
Now the box contains $40, and we both know it.
I sell the box to you for $30.
And we both walk away with a $10 profit.
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Profitable One Liners
Which profitable one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with profitable? I can suggest the ones about productive and enjoyable.
- What do you get if you cross Islam and Capitalism? No more jokes about the profit.
- What happens when you cross Islam with Capitalism? No more jokes about the profit.
- If you make money selling Indian bread... You run a Naan Profit Organization.
- What type of writing is the most profitable? A ransom note.
- Ideas that aren't profitable Don't make any cents
- What do you call a charity that gives bread to the poor? A naan-profit!
- Growing herbs can be very profitable After all, thyme is money
- I own a very profitable bakery I guess you could say, i'm rolling in the dough
- How do you milk a sheep and make a profit? Remove the audio jack
- Which race is the most profitable to run? A 401K
- Step 2. Profit Step 1. Time machine
- I work at a non-profit... ...but that's not what my boss actually wants.
- Why should you back an Indian charity? Because they are all naan profit.
- Why do fishmongers keep all the profit for themselves? Because they sel fish
- Talk is cheap. But AM radio still can't turn a profit.
Fun-Filled Profitable Jokes to Boost Your Mood
What funny jokes about profitable you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean helpful jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make profitable pranks.
Four guys are playing golf together and talking about how successful their sons are.
The first says, "My son is so successful, he's VP of his company and just gave his best friend a car. "
The second says, " That's nothing, my son is CEO of his company and just gave his best friend a house."
The third says, "Well, my son owns 3 highly profitable companies and just gave his best friend a jet."
They look expectantly at the last guy who says, "My son is a gay e**... who gets showered with love and admiration. He just got a car, a house, and a jet from three of his clients."
Eat the watermelons
A farmer in the country has a watermelon patch and upon inspection he discovers that some of the local kids have been helping themselves to a feast.
The farmer thinks of ways to discourage this profit-eating situation.
So he puts up a sign that reads: "WARNING! ONE OF THESE WATERMELONS CONTAINS CYANIDE! "
He smiled smugly as he watched the kids run off the next night without eating any of his melons.
The farmer returns to the watermelon patch a week later to discover that none of the watermelons have been eaten, but finds another sign that reads: "NOW THERE ARE TWO! "
Young Chuck
One fine old day, Young Chuck moved to Texas and bought a donkey from a farmer for $100.00.
The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day.
The next day he drove up and said, 'Sorry son, but I have some bad news, the donkey died.'
Chuck replied, 'Well, then just give me my money back.'
The farmer said, 'Can't do that. I went and spent it already.'
Chuck said, 'OK, then, just bring me the dead donkey.'
The farmer asked, 'What ya gonna do with him?
Chuck said, 'I'm going to raffle him off.'
The farmer said 'You can't raffle off a dead donkey!'
Chuck said, 'Sure I can, watch me. I just won't tell anybody he's dead.'
A month later, the farmer met up with Chuck and asked, 'What happened with the dead donkey?'
Chuck said, 'I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at two dollars apiece and made a profit of $898.00.'
The farmer said, 'Didn't anyone complain?'
Chuck said, 'Just the guy who won. So I gave him his two dollars back.'
Chuck now works on Wall Street.
A Politician wanted to build a bridge
A Politician wanted to build a bridge.
So, he calls 3 engineeering firms. One is Chinese, other is American and the last one is Brazillian.
The politician calls the heads of all the 3 firms to his office.
He asks the Chinese head, "How much do you take to build the bridge?"
He says, "3 Million Dollar. 1 Million for the workers, 1 Million for materials, 1 million for the profit."
The Politician asks the American head, "How much do you take to build the bridge?"
He says, "6 Million Dollars. 2 Million for the workers, 2 Million for materials, 2 million for the profit."
Finally, the Politician asks the Brazillian head, "How much do you take to build the bridge?"
He replies, "9 Million Dollars."
Suprised, the Politician asks him, "Why? Why so much?"
To which he replies, "3 Million for me, 3 Million for you, and 3 Million for the Chinese guy to build the bridge."
I inherited some land recently and managed to buy 100 donkeys for £100...
...I planned on selling them one by one for a profit, but overnight some sick guy broke into my farm and cut all the donkeys tails off! Now I'm left with 100 donkeys with no tails, so I'm going to have to wholesale them!
(ask me why I have to wholesale them...)
Well I can't retail them can I?!
