Productive Jokes
38 productive jokes and hilarious productive puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about productive that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Productive Short Jokes
Short productive jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The productive humour may include short production jokes also.
- I just got a job in a factory making plastic dracula There are only two of us on the production line, so I have to make every second count
- Why do chinese people love IPhones and Apple products? Because the greatest gifts are the ones your children made.
(inspired by u/lorenzomofo 's comment on a
r/nextfuckinglevel post) - It's obvious bill gates didn't create COVID none of his other products are able to release new versions this frequently
- When I was young, I thought rich people owned Bose music systems and the rest of us had Sony products. Turns out those were just stereotypes.
- I was working in a factory making plastic Draculas for Halloween. There was only 2 of us on the production line so I had to make every second count
- Testing products on animals Guy: We need to stop testing our products on animals
Boss: Why? Shampoo companies do that all the time.
Guy: Ya. But we make hammer. - Personally, i think that Tide pods are even better than advertised. I mean, anything that can clean your clothes and the gene pool in the same product...
- When I was young, I thought rich people bought Bose products and the rest of us had to settle for Sony. Turns out — that was just a stereotype.
- My employer has recently started testing their products on animals. I guess it wouldn't be so bad if I didn't work for a hammer factory.
- A CEO and his board of directors gather for a meeting CEO: We need to stop testing our products on animals.
BOD: Why? Shampoo companies do it all the time.
CEO: Yeah but we make hammers
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Productive One Liners
Which productive one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with productive? I can suggest the ones about produce and profit.
- What do you call a factory that sells passable products? A satisfactory!
- What do you call a factory that produces OK products? Satisfactory
- What is Pavlov's favorite hair product? Conditioner
- Apple fitness products don't work. I tried the iHop and it only made me gain weight.
- What did 2 say to 3 about 6? Oh don't mind him, he's just the product of our times!
- Lately I've found my job, building kitchen work surface, to be counter productive.
- Apple is releasing a new product called the iKnife. It's cutting edge technology.
- The Dyson Ball Vacuum… Is a horribly misleading name for this product.
- Apple just announced their next groundbreaking product The iShovel
- How do you stop an Internet troll? Seize their memes of production.
- When is a product with 70% less salt a bad thing? When you're buying salt.
- What is the best Apple product ? Apple juice
- My father sold podiums And he always stood behind his product
- Why didn't Adam buy Eve the new iPhone? Because Apple products are really expensive.
- How can you tell if someone uses Apple products? Just wait and they'll tell you.
Silly Productive Jokes for a Good Time with Friends
What funny jokes about productive you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean working jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make productive pranks.
Twenty years from now, kids are gonna think "Baby it's cold outside" is really weird, and we're gonna have to explain that it has to be understood as a product of its time.
You see, it used to get cold outside
The government reveals their new logo today....
The government reveals their new logo today, on a black background sit a magnificent image of a c**....
I guess it makes sense, seeings as how a c**... allows for inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of d**..., and gives you a sense of security while being s**....
The Washington r**... are changing the team name because of all the negativity, shame, humiliation, dissent, polarity, adversity, defiance, animosity, contempt, discrimination, division, counter-productivity and hostility associated with their name.
....from now on they will be known simply as the r**....
I was reading my emails...
The other day I was reading my emails and there was one from my boss, it said;
"Mr. Morgan I regret to inform you that although I thought this company could tolerate your ADD, I'm afraid you're just not productive enough. You may turn up Wednesday to collect your things. I sincerely hope you will be OK."
And I thought to myself, doesn't OK look like a sideways person?
The day Microsoft makes a product that doesn't s**......
Is the day they make a vacuum cleaner.
How many resumé writers does it take to change a lightbulb?
Only one:
Single-handedly managed the successful upgrade and deployment of new environmental illumination system with zero cost overruns, and zero safety incidents, increasing workplace safety and productivity.
If Microsoft ever makes a product that doesn't s**......
...it'll be a vacuum!
It's a good thing they shut down production of House of Cards
It's be too unrealistic to have someone playing the US president who has been accused of s**... misconduct.
Man: Hey sir! Could I interest you in a microscope?
Customer: No thanks, I'd have no use.
Man: Here is my business card in case you ever do!
Customer: I can't read this, it's too small!
Man: Boy have I got the product for you!
wife's insisting to quit job
The wife's insisting I quit my job, because she thinks it's cruel we've started testing our new products on rabbits.
She's got a point, I suppose...
I work in a hammer factory.
Did you know? In Marseille, they actually give you a certificate with every souvenir you buy, as a means of demonstrating that it's a genuine product of southern France.
It's proven Provence province provenance.
