The Best 82 Product Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Product jokes. There are some product placement jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these product ibm puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 of the Funniest Product Jokes and Puns
Twenty years from now, kids are gonna think "Baby it's cold outside" is really weird, and we're gonna have to explain that it has to be understood as a product of its time.
You see, it used to get cold outside
<> Apple has decided to cancel the children's iPod.
Apparently iTouch kids isn't a good product name.
Apple scraps a new product...
I've heard that Apple has scrapped their plans for the new children's-oriented IPod after realizing that "ITouch Kids" is not a good product name.
Successful entrepreneur
I met an old friend from high school the other day, and I couldn't believe how wealthy he had become. He ran a massively successful business, but could barely get a passing grade in math class when I knew him.
I asked him how he did it.
He said it was easy.
"All I did was find a product I could make for $2 and sell for $4. You'd be surprised just how much 2% adds up over the years!"
If Microsoft ever makes a product that doesn't suck...
...it'll be a vacuum!
So I went to a production about puns today...
...it was basically just a play, on words.
What do Porsche and Apple have in common?
New product, same design.
What did fruit loops say when launching their product to compete with cheerios?
Toucan play at that game
Perforated Paper Products Inc just went out of business.
They should have seen it coming. They had a tearable product.
What is Hitler's favourite beauty product?
Polish Remover
Apple's next big product is going to be a total fail
Just watch
You can explore product podiums reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean product customer dad jokes. There are also product puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
In a short-sighted rushed effort to reboot the iTouch product Apple decided to market it to schools. Apple named their new product iTouch Kids. It didn't go over well...
It did great in the 12-25 prison stint group though.
What is the name of Apple's revolutionary new product that allows elite pirates to see from their eyepatches.
The iEyeCaptain
A 70 year old man buys his wife a present
For their 50th wedding anniversary a 70 year old man buys his wife a see through night gown
The next day he goes back to the store and returns it
Cashier: I'm sorry you were unsatisfied with our product. May I ask what was wrong with it?
70 Year Old Man: It was all wrinkled
What paper product speaks really quickly?
Wrapping paper.
I was on the beach with my wife.
"My business is failing, nobody is buying my product," I told her.
An old man, who was completely naked, overheard and walked over. He said, "That's interesting."
"You are completely naked," I frowned, "There are children on this beach."
He said, "Well at least I know my target market."
What did 2 say to 3 about 6?
Oh don't mind him, he's just the product of our times!
If Gravemind from Halo did product placement...
We exist / Together now
Two corpses / In one grave
Burma-Shave
Brexit
There is a new slimming product in town.
It is called Brexit. It'll help you lose a lot of pounds.
Will Apple ever release a product that lasts for more than a few years?
iDoubtit
Apple is going to release the first smart vacuum cleaner this year
The first Apple product that doesn't suck
(not hating on apple or anything but i got this joke somewhere)
What is Russia's favorite imported product?
Ukraine.
A new type of product !
I opened a company selling land mines disguised as prayer mats. Prophets are going through the roof.
Apple finally releases a product that doesn't suck
iVac
A Rabbi had been saving foreskin
He wanted to make something nice out of his collection so he brought them to leather tanner. When he goes to pick up his product he's surprised that all his foreskin collection only produced a coin purse. The leather tanner explained that if you rub the coin purse it turns into a duffel bag.
When is a product with 70% less salt a bad thing?
When you're buying salt.
With your current salary what Apple product can you buy?
Apple juice
I was thinking of taking the cross product of force and distance, ...
... but that's so much work.
Gas stations should be ashamed for selling a poisonous product that we over-consume and that pollutes the Earth...
Seriously, Slim Jims are terrible.
What's the difference between a regular product and a fancy one?
The regular one says "Made in China".
The fancy one says "Designed in the USA. Made in China."
Why aren't there any fat girls on the boxes of girl scout cookies?
Because good drug dealers don't use their own product.
Wonder Woman would have been a much better movie without all the product placement.
2 and a half hours of Amazon this and Amazon that... sheesh.
Apple came up with a tablet computer with touch screen, geared toward children.
They cancelled the product when they realized nobody wants to buy something called iTouch Kids.
What's the best part of advertising for prostitutes?
The product sells itself.
The Great Wall Of China Is Famous
Because it's the only Chinese product that lasted this long.
There is a country whose main export is spiders...
They have a gross domestic product.
Interviewer: have you done any public service?
Me: I write product reviews online for mostly everything I buy.
Personally, i think that Tide pods are even better than advertised.
I mean, anything that can clean your clothes and the gene pool in the same product...
IKEA founder Ingvar Kamprad dies at 91.
His funeral has been postponed until his family get the screw that wasn't included with his KÖFFIN product
Man: Hey sir! Could I interest you in a microscope?
Customer: No thanks, I'd have no use.
Man: Here is my business card in case you ever do!
Customer: I can't read this, it's too small!
Man: Boy have I got the product for you!
You could say the smell of a new Apple product is...
Scent from my iPhone
A salesman approaches you
Thanks, but I'm not interested in microscopes right now.
Salesman: That's okay, take my business card anyway.
This text is tiny, I can't read it.
Salesman: Boy, do I have the product for you
I don't like product placement.
But my buddy Kenwood.
Apple will make a product that doesn't suck....
when they make a vacuum.
It's not surprising that the Japanese have adopted so much of American culture.
The first American product they tested blew everyone away.
My father sold podiums
And he always stood behind his product
What is Pavlov's favorite hair product?
Conditioner
I just bought this hair product that uses bat guano.
It's supposed to get rid of dandruff, but it didn't work!
Turns out it's just sham poo.
What's it called when someone messes with unpurchased product in central Florida?
Tamper Bay
I'd like to take this opportunity to endorse podiums
They're really a product I can stand behind!
I would tell you a joke about Ikea furniture...
But the setup takes to long and the final product is mediocre.
I am a complex kid.
Because I am the product of a real mom and an imaginary father.
Jello has created a product that deters insects.
It's very effective, but the flavor is OFF-pudding.
An Apple a day keeps the doctor away
Because you have no money left after buying an Apple product
The day Microsoft makes a product that doesn't suck...
Is the day they make a vacuum cleaner.
Seems like there are very few products made in America any more. I just bought a TV and it said,
Built in Antenna.
I went on shark tank to sell a mixed meat product
I offered 20% steak
What is Thanos' favorite dairy product?
Half and Half
Phil Swift has a new product
He puts on a pair of boots and says, " I present to you the FlexBoots! Now this product may seem like ordinary boots, but with these bad boys you can run up walls, on the ceiling!" He goes on to demonstrate them by walking on random surfaces. "To show you the power FlexBoots", the camera slowly zooms out, and inverts itself, showing Phil standing under an airplane ."I'm on an airplane!" The pilot of the plane looks out the window and says,
"Weird Flex but okay."
Got called a homophone after leaving a bad review on a store's website.
Look, eye don't care who cells the product. If it brakes, I won't by it with my hard urned cache!
If a person is sueing a product for blinding him/her in one of their eyes, they should win double the amount
Because they are not gonna be able to see half of it anyway.
Was recently hired as beauty product model...
I was the "before" model.
Apple just announced their next groundbreaking product
The iShovel
What did 2 say to 3 when they saw 6 act like an idiot
Don't mind him. He's just a product of our times
what do you call a kid born from incest
gross domestic product
Me- Alexa check my bank balance and tell me which apple product can I buy?
Alexa- apple juice
I heard people are getting paid to mention companies and do product placement in their Reddit posts!
That's almost as crazy as the discounts at Jez's Furniture Emporium. Sale this weekend
Did you know that brass is the product of incest?
It's made from kissing ***CuZn***s
Very bad product name
Did you guys hear that Apple scrapped its idea for an iPod touch for children when they realized that iTouch Kids would be a bad product name?
I've invented an exciting new product. Say goodbye to noise-cancelling headphones...
...and say hello to noise-cancelling megaphones!
What do you call the byproduct of incest?
Gross Domestic product.
Apple wanted to launch a new product directed at children.
In retrospect, it was probably not the best idea to call it "iTouch Kids".
Pearl Jam just came out with a product that regulates women's periods
They're calling it Even Flow
What's the difference between a product made in Mexico and a product made in America?
One is made by a Mexican, while the other is made by a Mexican immigrant.
Apple is set to release their new electric smart car in 2024...
It will be the first apple product with windows.
I'm like a cat when it comes to kids
I don't really enjoy the product
But I love playing with the box it came out of.
What do a pizza delivery person and a gynecologist have in common?
They can both smell the product, but they can't eat it
Apple is planning to release a vaccum cleaner in a couple of years.
It's rumored to be the only Apple product that won't suck.
Apple is releasing a new product called the iKnife.
It's cutting edge technology.
What do you call a product that is not targeted at straight or gay people?
A Bi-Product
Dog Show Hair Remover
A young woman had entered her dog in the dog show in the smooth-haired breed category. To give it an advantage, she went to the pharmacist for some hair remover. The pharmacist gave her the product requested and advised, "Just remember to keep your arms up for at least five minutes." "Errr... it's not for my armpits," she flustered, embarrassed, "it's for my Chihuahua" "Oh well, in that case," said the pharmacist, "don't ride a bike for twenty minutes."
Did you know? In Marseille, they actually give you a certificate with every souvenir you buy, as a means of demonstrating that it's a genuine product of southern France.
It's proven Provence province provenance.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the product sales jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working product aleve piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.