The Best 35 Producer Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Producer jokes. There are some producer bbc jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these producer actor puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 Funniest Producer Jokes and Puns
A man goes to audition for an anchor position at a local tv station
A man goes to the television station auditioning for an anchor position.
He sits down in front of the camera and begins, soon it is obvious that he has a terrible stutter, and hisleft eye continuously winks.
The producer says, "Thank you for your audition, we'll let you know."
The man says, "W-w-wait a moment, I c-c-can fix this."
He opens his breifcase, and about 200 condoms fall out, he digs deeper and pulls out a bottle of aspitin.
He take a single aspirin, and then re-reads his copy perfectly, his wink having vanished.
The producer is dumbfounded, and he says, "Thanks fantastic, but what's with the condoms?"
The man says, "This is what they give you if you stutter and wink and ask for aspirin at the pharmacy.
Shares of MRF limited, the worlds largest plastic producer, went up 4.6% today
On the news that Joan Rivers will be recycled
When a maple syrup producer sees a maple tree they don't own, do they think "I'd tap that"?
What did the Trap producer say when a spider landed on his keyboard?
VVVVVVVVVVVVVVHHH!!!
Welcome to the BBC.
Rape all the children you like, just don't punch a producer.
I was talking to a record producer at the urinals
and now I've got a number 1 on my hands
Why was the EDM producer bad at fishing?
Because he kept dropping the bass
A young actress runs into a famous movie producer in an elevator....
...she says "I'm a big fan of your work. I'll give you a blow job if you put me in one of your movies". He replies. "Ok, but what's in it for me?"
Breaking News: United States is now the largest producer of salt.
So Salty...
Chuck Norris, the actor, film producer and screenwriter died in his house today at 76 years of age
He is now feeling much better and has fully recovered from this minor annoyance
2016 has done the impossible
It claimed the life of Chuck Norris.
"Carlos Ray "Chuck" Norris (born March 10, 1940) is an American martial artist, actor, film producer and screenwriter died this morning in his house in Oklahoma at the age of 76. He is feeling much better now and has fully recovered from this minor annoyance."
You can explore producer audition reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean producer bollywood dad jokes. There are also producer puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Why did the producers of 007 films use government debt to fund their newest film?
Because interest in the Bond is so low.
If you're a priest...
Does that make you a Mass producer?
Jeff Probst is the host and executive producer of the reality TV Show Survivor.
Well, Probst to him.
What is Nambia?
It's the world's top producer of covfefe.
In the original 'Good Will Hunting' script, there is a surprise gay sex scene between the two straight leads. It was purposely put there as a test to see if studios actually read the script. Harvey Weinstein was the only producer who mentioned the scene
Weinstein said that the sex scene usually takes place before he approves a movie
Harley Morenstein has teamed up with a top Hollywood producer to create an Epic Meal Time spin off...
Introducing... Harvey Weinstein, in... Epic Feel time!
Did you guys hear about the music producer who got caught stealing people's music?
He got a lot of FLAC.
How did the 20th Century Fox producer say his wedding vows?
What did the Movie Producer do to the man who kept breaking his arm on set?
Recast
Recent news that a Hollywood producer had sexually harassed many women brought him down.
He will never produce or reproduce again.
So Amy Schumer claims that a big time producer, sexually harassed her by asking her for a blow job.
Turns out, he was just telling her she sucks.
"How much to buy a singing ensemble?"
PRODUCER: You mean a choir?
"Fine, how much to acquire a singing ensemble?"
What did the Red Hot Chili Peppers do when their producer said he didn't like their new tracks?
They bought long sleeve shirts.
What does...
What does a cake, a producer in Hollywood, and a flat earth have in common?
Someone is bound to believe in them.
What do you say to the Movie Producer?
Will the defendant please rise.
What did the producer say after seeing Caitlyn Jenner's audition for a Marvel movie role?
"Cast her as the Hulk. She's been Bruce before."
If they still existed, the Soviet government would have have been the world's lead producer of memes.
They needed to seize the memes of production.
Your assistant says you have a voicemail from a music producer
The DJ Khaled
So The Beatles and their producer, George Martin, were in the studio......
Paul: Any ideas on how to end Hey Jude?
John: Nah
George: Nah
Ringo: Nah
George Martin: Nah
Paul: Perfect!
Walt Disney notices a sharp pain in his knee.
He starts rubbing it, icing it, elevating it on a pillow. But over the following days it only grows worse. He visits his doctor and reports this pain.
Which knee is hurting you, Walt?
The famous film producer points to his left knee.
Disney.
I earned an Oscar for being the best producer.
He was born and named yesterday after my long fight against fertility.
George Clooney Leonardo DiCaprio and Matthew McConaughey get together to make a new film.
George Clooney says he's gonna direct Leonardo DiCaprio says he's gonna be the producer and Matthew McConaughey says I'll write I'll writte I'll write
A group of movie producers are working on the next avengers/MCU movie
Producer 1: Does anyone have any ideas for the villain?
Producer 2: Ok, how about a 14 foot tall, flaming eye-ball, with poison swords for arms, who shoots lasers from his feet, and has a pet llama made of diamonds
Head producer: You're over-thinking this, let's just keep it low-key
According to Wikipedia, the open-source online encyclopedia, India is the world's largest producer of spices.
But then again, you should always take stats from the internet with a pinch of salt.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the producer stallone jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working producer hollywood piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.