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Prize Giving Jokes

20 prize giving jokes and hilarious prize giving puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about prize giving that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Prize Giving Short Jokes

Short prize giving jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The prize giving humour may include short prize jokes also.

  1. What kind of prize do you give someone who hasn't moved a muscle in over a year? A trophy.
  2. What kind of prize do you give someone who hasn't used their muscles at all for the past year? A trophy
  3. What award does NASA give the astronauts that board their spacecraft particularly quickly? The starship -enter-prize.
  4. What do you give a country that hasn't rang it's bell for war in 100 years? A no bell peace prize.
  5. What kind of prize do you give to a person that hasn't moved a muscle in over a year? Atrophy
  6. Why did the lottery winner begrudgingly give his prize car to his parents? Because they told him it was his-folks'-wagon.

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Prize Giving One Liners

Which prize giving one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with prize giving? I can suggest the ones about prize winner and award ceremony.

  1. What did they give the guy who invented the doorknocker? A no-bell prize
  2. What award do they give to the thinnest person in the world? The No-Belly Prize
  3. What kind of prize do you give someone who hasn't moved in a year? A trophy

Prize Giving Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about prize giving you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean awards ceremony jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make prize giving pranks.

A zookeeper notices his prize gorilla was getting aggressive..

She wouldn't eat. She wouldn't sleep. And she constantly kept trying to attack the zookeeper. So, he did some research and found out female gorillas can become depressed and aggressive when deprived from s**....
The zookeeper then looked around for another male gorilla for her to engage in i**..., but unfortunately the zoo couldn't afford to import a male gorilla just for her to have s**....
Giving his funding situation, he goes up to the janitor and asks him "Hey, for $500, would you have s**... with this gorilla?"
The janitor thought about it for a minute, and then replied "Sure, on three conditions. First condition, I don't want to kiss her."
"Okay sure! I wouldn't expect you to!"
The janitor then stated "Second condition. I don't want anyone knowing about this ordeal."
"Sure, fine! Not a problem! What's your third condition?"
Janitor said "Give me at least 2 weeks to come up with the $500"

Farming for a Nobel Prize

Farmer John is driving along the road one day when he spots his neighbour, Bill, standing on top of his tractor in the middle of his field. Overcome with curiosity, he ambles over and asks Bill what he is up to?
Bill replies, "Trying to win a Nobel prize".
"How do you figure?"
"Well, I hear they give them to people who are outstanding in their fields!"

A s**... person buys a lottery ticket for $1

To his delight, he won a million dollars. Going forward to claim his prize, he was informed that he will be paid in $1000 instalments. Appalled and shocked, he shouted to the register, give me my million dollars or give me my $1 back

Pritam is driving down the Delhi-Amritsar highway when he spots his friend Shankar standing in the middle of a huge field of grass.
He pulls the car over to the side of the road and notices that Shankar is just standing there, doing nothing, looking at nothing.
Pritam gets out of the car, walks all the way out to Shankar and asks him, "Excuse me, what are you doing?"
Shankar replies, "I'm trying to win a Nobel Prize."
"How?" asks Pritam, puzzled.
"Well, I heard they give the Noble Prize to people who are outstanding in their field."

Nobel Prize

A man is driving down a country road, when he spots a farmer standing in the middle of a huge field of nothing but grass.
He pulls the car over to the side of the road and notices that the farmer is just standing there, doing absolutely nothing, looking at nothing.
The man gets out of his car, walks all the way over to the farmer and asks him, "Ah excuse me sir, but are you OK? Do you need any help?"
The farmer replies:"I'm trying to win a Nobel Prize."
"How would you do that?" asks the man quite puzzled at this answer.
"Well, I heard they give the Nobel Prize to people who are out standing in their field."

There was a father who called his 5 small children together.

As they sat together in a circle on the floor the dad placed a toy in the middle.
He explained to them that he won this toy as a door prize and he wanted to give it to one of them.
He asked them who is the most obedient?
Five sets of eyes looked up at him.
Sensing that they didn't understand the word he then asked, ok, who always obeys mommy, and does everything she says?
One of the children picked up the toy and handed it to the father. You win! exclaimed the child.

Rancher Abe and his mating bull

Abe the rancher was having issues with his stock because his prized bull would not mate. Abe's friends told him to try a v**... smear technique.
They told Abe to get a cow and rub the v**... juices and then rub it onto and under the bulls nose
Sure enough, Abe's prized bull when crazy and began to mate that day.
After a long day of success Abe headed back to his home where his wife was sound asleep. He saw his wife laying there and though maybe he'd give the v**... smear technique at try on himself. He reached into her p**..., fondled around and smeared the juices all over his nose.
Instantly he felt a surge, he was up and ready to go. He tried to wake up his wife, "Honey! Honey get up! I have something important to show you!"
Abe's wife looked at him in shock "Abe! You woke me up to tell me you had a nose bleed?!?!"

Jill goes home one night with a guy she met at a club. He's tall, super hot, and seems different than most guys she meets. They arrive at his place and head straight to his room. Jill can't help but notice a shelf full of teddy bears. On the bottom are small teddy bears, on the middle are medium-sized teddy bears, and finally, on the top are large teddy bears, all lined up beside each other. She begins to think that he is sentimental and sweet, and isn't afraid to show it. Her heart melts and she want to give him the best night of his life. She gives him a bl*wjob, and lets him really give it to her, and even takes it in the rear! In the morning, she slowly gets dressed, and smiles at him and asks, "How was that?" He nods and says, "Not too f*ckin' bad at all. Help yourself to a prize on the second shelf!"