Private Job Jokes
14 private job jokes and hilarious private job puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about private job that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Private Job Short Jokes
Short private job jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The private job humour may include short new job jokes also.
- A kid was talking to his dad because he was considering a job in organized crime. The dad replied with "government or private sector"
- I recently lost my job as a drill instructor... ...who knew you weren't supposed to beat your privates in public?!
- How do apply for a job at the NSA? You make a private phone call to anyone else, and submit your application.
Share These Private Job Jokes With Friends
Private Job One Liners
Which private job one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with private job? I can suggest the ones about jobs and previous job.
- What's the only job where you get to shave your privates at work? Army barber
- What do you call a Private Investigator who is bad at his job? A Defective!
Private Job Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about private job you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean job searching jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make private job pranks.
I think Jobs are too snoopy when it comes to our private s**... lives
Whenever it has the spot on the application that says s**...: , as a young man, I'm always just slightly caught off guard. I reluctantly put my number of times there.
Sometimes it provides me with the choice of M or F online. I always select the F for few. Hopefully one day I'll be able to put M for many
As an aside, for some reason, the people I meet during the interview always seem confused at first
Obgyn Assistant
A guy is looking for a job and sees an application for an obstetrical assistant who has to trim patients "private parts" and rub oil there in preparation for the session. He tells the officer, "I'd like to apply for that one" and the officer says he has to go up to Sudbury. (Way the h**... up north!)
What? The job's in Sudbury he asks?
No, it's here. That's just the end of the line.
A young man goes into the Job Center in Downtown Los Angeles, and sees an advertisement for a Gynecologist's Assistant.
Interested, he goes to learn more. 'Can you give me some more details?' he asks the clerk.
The clerk pulls up the file and says, 'The job entails getting the ladies ready for the gynecologist. You have to help them out of their underwear, lay them down and carefully wash their private regions, then apply shaving foam and gently shave off the hair, then rub in soothing oils so that they're ready for the gynecologist's examination.
There's an annual salary of $85,000, but you're going to have to go to Albuquerque New Mexico. That's about 620 miles from here.'
'Good grief, is that where the job is?'
'No sir... that's where the end of the line is right now...
The Woman in a Coma
A woman has been on a coma for almost 3 years following a tragic accident. Her husband couldn't let go so he decided to just keep her on life support. One day, as the nurse on duty was giving her a bed bath, she noticed a slight response from the monitors hooked onto the woman everytime she wipes her privates. She immediately informed the attending physician who in turn called the husband. When the husband arrived the doctor told him that there may still be hope, and o**... s**... might revive his wife. The doctor led the husband to his wife's room and left him to do the job in private. After 20 minutes the alarms sounded and the doctor and the nurses quickly rushed into the woman's room. What they found was a flat line, her husband zipping up his pants saying:"I think she choked.."
Coming out of retirement
A retired man went into the Job Center in Downtown Denver, and saw a card advertising for a Gynecologist's Assistant. Interested, he went in and asked the clerk for details.
The clerk pulled up the file and read --
"The job entails getting the ladies ready for the gynecologist. You have to help the women out of their underwear, lay them down and carefully wash their private regions, then apply shaving foam and gently shave off the hair, then rub in soothing oils so they're ready for the gynecologist's examination."
"The annual salary is $65,000, and you'll have to go to Billings, Montana."
"Good grief; is that where the job is?"
"No sir; that's where the end of the line is right now."
A mortician was working late one night...
A mortician was working late one night. It was his job to examine the dead bodies before they were sent off to be buried or cremated. As he examined the body of Mr. Sam, who was about to be cremated, he made an amazing discovery: Sam had the longest private part he had ever seen!
I'm sorry Mr. Sam, said the mortician, but I can't send you off to be cremated with a tremendously huge private part like this. It has to be saved for posterity.
And with that the coroner used his tools to remove the dead man's distinguishing member. The coroner stuffed his prize into a briefcase and took it home. The first person he showed was his wife.
I have something to show you that you won't believe, he said, and opened his briefcase.
Oh, my God! she screamed, Sam is dead!
Job opportunity
A young man goes into the Job Center in Jacksonville, Florida, and sees a card advertising for a Gynecologist's Assistant.
Interested, he goes to learn more – Can you give me some more details? he asks the clerk.
The clerk pulls up the file and says, The job entails getting the ladies ready for the gynecologist.
You have to help them out of their underwear, lay them down and carefully wash their private regions,
then apply shaving foam and gently shave off the hair, then rub in soothing oils so that they're ready for the gynecologist's examination.
There's an annual salary of $75,000, but you're going to have to go to Oxford, Mississippi. That's about 620 miles from here.
Oh, okay… is that where the job is?
No sir – that's where the end of the line is right now.