The Best 58 Privacy Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Privacy jokes. There are some privacy browser jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these privacy disrobe puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Privacy Jokes and Puns

My son came home as I was taking his door off it's hinges and asked Dad what are you doing?

We've updated our privacy policy

On the one hand I feel bad that Jeniffer Lawrence privacy was invaded, but on the other hand

...well that hand is busy.

Facebook should make a bigger deal over privacy, certainly as far as photos are concerned.

I managed to find a really attractive girl I'd seen before, and without adding her, I could see all her photos, including some in a bikini.
I mean, she's lucky it's only me wanking and not some pervert.

Privacy joke, Facebook should make a bigger deal over privacy, certainly as far as photos are concerned.

If I know anything about girls, it's that they appreciate privacy.

Trust me I've read a ton of diaries.

Woman in a coma

Two nurses are giving a woman in a coma a sponge bath. They notice that when they get near her private areas that she starts to get a little stimulated. The theorize that oral sex will bring her out the coma. They go out into the lobby and tell her husband their theory. The husband is a little aprehensive about it at first, but he agrees to do it. The nurses leave the man with his wife and give him some privacy. They come back about 10 minutes later and the woman is dead! "What happened?" asks one of the nurses. The man replies, "I dont know...I think she choked."

I wrote a college paper about government agencies slowly encroaching on internet privacy.

It's called "NSA: An Essay."

A man starts wearing cellophane pants around the house.

At first, his wife doesn't mind, since it's in the privacy of their own home, but pretty soon he starts wearing the cellophane pants outside of the house. She makes him go to a psychiatrist and the guy says "Doc, you've got to help me I can't stop wearing these cellophane pants." And the doctor replies, "Well...I can clearly see your nuts."

Privacy joke, A man starts wearing cellophane pants around the house.

A woman is in a coma and her nurses are giving her a sponge bath

They notice when they get near her lower area that her vital signs improve a little. They think oral sex may bring her out of her coma. They go in the waiting room and tell her husband their theory and assure him they will have complete privacy. The nurses leave and come back 15 minutes later and the woman is flat-lined. What happened?? Yelled the nurse. Her husband replies, I don't know...I think she choked.

My brother told me he thinks I invade his privacy

Well he didn't actually tell me. I read it in his diary.

Guys wife in horrible accident & now in a coma...

...& seems hopeless. However one of the nurses noticed slight movement when sponging her private parts & encouraged the husband to try & arouse her. Try a little oral sex is all, you never know. We'll give you privacy. So the husband goes in, but 2 minutes later the wife flat-lines & dies. The nurse runs in & asks what happened.
"I'm not positive, but I think she choked to death!"

Strippers won't tell you their real names for privacy,

But they'll show you their buttholes for $5

You can explore privacy professionalism reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean privacy monitor dad jokes. There are also privacy puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Windows 10 users won't get this.


A guy walks past a mental hospital

A guy is walking past a mental hospital with a high privacy fence, and can hear some kind of chant going on. As he gets closer, he hears them chanting, "sixteen! Sixteen! Sixteen!"Curious as to what is going on, he notices a small hole in the fence. He walks over and presses his face to it to try and see in, only to get poked in the eyes. The chant continues, "Seventeen! Seventeen! Seventeen!"

Asteriskie_, want to do a Privacy Checkup?

We care about your privacy [...]

β€”The Facebook Privacy Team

Clean my Window

Of course I should clean my windows. But privacy is important too.

So Trump is working with Putin on cybersecurity...

In other news, the principal at my school is working with the boys to install a surveillance system to insure privacy in the girls' locker room.

Privacy joke, So Trump is working with Putin on cybersecurity...

I told my mum she was invading my privacy

She told me I came out her privacy

Big Brother can see every single facet of our lives, we truly have no privacy and no control over own lives.

But can Big Brother see why kids love the taste of cinnamon toast crunch?

Did you hear the joke about the Russian Oligarchs?

Neither did anybody else, because the Secret Service was kept away due to "privacy concerns"

So much for privacy...

Google: We really value your privacy

Twitter: We'd never collect anything

Apple: We securely encrypt everything on-device

Facebook: Literally gives you an ad for something you dreamt about

My girlfriend said to me that she would break up with me for invading her privacy

Or at least that's what it said in her diary.

The misuse of users' Facebook data has caused Mark Zuckerberg significant emotional distress.

He asks that you respect his privacy during this challenging time.

What do you call a person who does not respect your privacy?

A Zuckerberg

People who steal our privacy to manipulate us are worms.

We should call them Cambridge Annelidica

Mark Zuckerberg values your privacy

at $157 Facebook stock price

Why doesn't Cookie Monster have good internet privacy?

He always accepts the cookies.

My psychiatrist says I invade other people's privacy because I'm "insecure".

Says the guy whose home WiFi password is "password123".

The last man on Earth was sitting alone in a room, when all of a sudden his phone rang...

We've updated our privacy policy.

If a tree falls in the woods and nobody's around to hear it

Does it still let everyone know it updated its privacy policy?

I'm really worried about my privacy being compromised and my personal data being shared by third parties.

"Alexa, what steps can I take to protect my privacy?"

I'd tell you a secret, but...

I too have updated my privacy policy.

Teleports behind you

We've updated our Privacy & Policy

You know why North Korea won't meet for the nuclear summit?

They haven't updated their privacy policy.

"We've updated our privacy agreements."

Hits I accept without reading the changes.

Hey guys something new came up!!!!!

We updated our privacy policy.

God does 24 * 7 * ∞ surveillance... at least he doesn't bother us with updating His Privacy Policy

What doesn't the US government update it's privacy policy?

You need to have one first before you updated it.

Today, my girlfriend has agreed that we can do everything in bed now.

She accepted my updated privacy policy without reading.

My wife wasn't too thrilled

When I cursed at Ashley Madison for updating their privacy policy.

*Opens box of cereal*

We've updated our privacy policy.

Roses are red, sorry for the Hypocrisy

But hey, we've updated our privacy policy

My roommate recently started having much louder sex with his girlfriend. "What changed?" I asked.

"We've updated our privacy policy."

I like my privacy policy updates like I like my women

All talk and zero action

What does the P in Facebook stand for?


What's the difference between true communism and unhindered capitalism.

One spies on the people, removes privacy for the sake of the masses, and props up an establishment that serves only the lucky few.

And the other fortunately never caught on in America.

My wife thinks I don't give her enough privacy.

At least that's what she said in her diary...

My wife does'nt think I respect her privacy enough.

Atleast that's what it says in her diary.

If you live in an igloo, what's the worst thing about global warming?

No privacy!

The lizard and I have so much respect for each other's privacy

When I enter room, she leaves. When she enters the room, I leave

My friends told me I didn't give them enough privacy...

We were at a friend's house when two of them were talking behind my back

Outraged I said "Hey don't talk behind my back!"

But I forgot one crucial thing...

They couldn't hear me from the vents.

A daughter thinks I don't respect her privacy

Why would she write such stuff in her diary?

My wife thinks I'm nosy and I don't respect her privacy.

At least, that's what she wrote in her Diary.

As a physician I can not disclose if any of my patients have long hair, smoke cannabis or wear tie die clothes..

Because of hippie privacy regulations.

When companies say We value your privacy!

They really mean We put a value on your privacy!

A Man is walking home when

He passes a large privacy fence. On the other side of the fence he can hear about 3 or 4 children chanting," 12,12,12,12,12" very ritualisticly. He sees a small hole in the fence and gets right up to it so he can see what is happening on the other side. Just as he did a small finger came out of the hole and poked him in the eye and the children began chanting," 13,13,13,13,13."

What room in a hospital has the least amount of privacy?

The ICU.

Never trust a website with purple terms and conditions.

They clearly violet your privacy.

My brother thinks I don't give him enough privacy.

That's what he wrote about me in his diary.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the privacy encryption jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working privacy avail piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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