The Best 47 Print Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Print jokes. There are some print sizes jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these print paper puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Print Jokes and Puns

I made this up today. How do you print something when you've really got to go to the toilet?

You ctrl p.

Saw a billboard in Rhode Island.

"doesn't matter" . It was supposed to say "size doesn't matter" but the print was to big.

I've got a 3D printer

But it only prints pieces of paper.

Print joke, I've got a 3D printer

Hans meets an art dealer on vacation

A German man is on vacation in Spain. He sees a local man selling artwork, so he goes over and checks out his wares. He notices a print of Picasso's Guernica on an easel. The German asks did you do this? , to which the Spaniard replied, nope. you did.

Why did the printer have wet ink?

Because it couldn't control P


the printer in my office is fondly called Bob Marley

it keeps jamming

In a touching tribute to Joan Rivers, Target today announced that it would print funny little anecdotes on all of their shopping bags.

Just so plastic can make us laugh one more time.

Print joke, In a touching tribute to Joan Rivers, Target today announced that it would print funny little anecdo

Printer jam

Why couldn't the incontinent person print?

They couldn't Ctrl-P

Why couldn't the surgeon 3D print a new pair of lungs?

He ran out of tissue paper.

Why are old printers so musical?

Because they are prone to jamming.

Rules for wearing animal print yoga pants:

1. Weigh less than the animals they represent

2.

3.

You can explore print ctrl reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean print file dad jokes. There are also print puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Why couldn't the incontinent man print his documents?

He couldn't Ctrl+P

Do you know why newspapers don't print the pictures of all criminals?

They would run out of black ink

How to make your wife take care while driving?

Tell her that if she meets with a serious accident, the newspaper will have to print her age.

Looks like the UK didn't read the fine print when cutting off ties with the EU...

You Brexit, you bought it.

An old Jewish man dies.

His last wish to his son is to print an obituary. The son goes to newspaper office and asks how much they charge for an obituary. They tell him $5 per word.

He says then print "Solomon dead". The newspaper tell him they require minimum 5 words. He thinks for a moment and says, then make it "Solomon dead, wheelchair for sale".

Print joke, An old Jewish man dies.

My HP printer died today

It was like a Brother to me.

Why did the printer go to the gym?

To get toner.

Why can't you print money on shuttlecocks?

That's badminton


I tried printing something in 4D

but I ran out of time.

I'm going to be opening a store that sells cow print socks

One for your left foot, one for the udder

A guy was just sacked from the local print shop for always aligning their text to the left margin

I think it's justified.

They charged me money to print out a screen shot of UFC fight night.

It was paper view.

My Doctors surgery called me today to tell me that the print out I received stating I have Blood Type A was incorrect.

They say it was a Type O

Why is the printer making so many noises?

Because the papers are jamming

I told her that I like to print nude photos at the 24 hour print store...

She said, "That's kinky."

And I said, "No, it's Kinko's."

My grandpa asked me how to print a document on his new computer.

I said, Control, P.

He replied: "I haven't been able to do that for years!"

Why did the printer start playing music?

There was a paper jam

Article on the future of L.A. rapper "Post Malone" was withdrawn from print by local mail service.

Or;

Post on post-Post Malone's career and goals was postponed from posting by postal service.

I don't mind camo print clothing...

I just can't see myself wearing it.

Jewish Man calls Newspaper office to print death news of his Grandpa

Clerk: Rs.50 per word

Jewish Man: Grandpa Dead

Clerk: Sorry Sir, Minimum 5 words required ...

Jewish Man: "Grandpa Dead, Wheelchair for Sale!

I was caught masturbating in the library over the small print of laws and local regulations....

.....I got off on a technicality

I 3D printed a tree branch today

It's PLA stick

The police chief asked, "Do you have any leads or suspects for the murder case?" The officer responded, "I'd like to interview the bartender wearing high heels and a leopard print dress." The chief frowned and said...

"Please, just wear your police uniform."

My grandad asked me how to print on his computer...

I told him it's Ctrl-P. He says he hasn't been able to do that for ages.

Boss: If I knew your writing was so small I'd never have hired you

Me: Well it was on my resume, you should have read the small print

In Norway they print barcodes on the sides of their battleships.

When they return from war they can Scandinavian.

Why does Donald Trump print his emails?

He's never been keen on fax

What did the printer say when it ran out of paper?

Oh sheet

My printer just told me it was joining a band

Which makes sense.

It loves to jam.

Waiter! Why does my dessert have a shoe print in it?

Sir, you did say "Apple pie and step on it!"

A man walked into a copy shop, and requested that they print a book for him with pages 30 feet long and 1 foot wide.

Printer: "Why do you need pages that long?"

Man: "Well, it's a long story."

Grandpa asked me how to print on his new computer.

I said: "Just control-p."

He said: "I haven't been able to do that for years!"

My friend claims he can print a Gun using his 3D Printer. I'm not impressed.

I've had a Canon printer for years.

My printer died last night under suspicious circumstances.

Epson didn't kill itself.

A soldier's wife has just returned from her insurance provider and is looking very, very unhappy

"What's the matter?" Her friend asked.

"I went to get my husband covered privately, but the fine print stated: no payouts when the holder dies as a result of an explosion and/or from injuries sustained in an explosion," she replied.

"Oh? So why would that make you unhappy?" Her friend asked.

"Well, it's too late to stop the freaking timer now!"

A man's printer started printing more and more faintly, so he called a local repair shop.

A friendly young man informed him, Well, you could bring it in for a cleaning, but we charge $50 for that, so you might be better off just reading the manual and trying the job yourself.

Pleasantly surprised by this candor, the man said, Thanks, son. Does your boss know that you discourage business?

Actually, it was my boss's idea, said the young employee. He says that if we let people try to fix things themselves first, we end up making even more money!

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the print jammin jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working print unix piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes