Following is our collection of Princess jokes which are very funny. There are some princess twilight jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these princess suitors puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
So I made her marry an old guy she's never met to secure an alliance with the French.
They found her head and shoulders in the front seat.
Because she wasn't wearing her seat-belt.
Stay safe tonight everyone!
What's the difference between Princess Diana and a blade of grass? About six feet.
How is Princess Diana like a mobile phone? Both die in tunnels.
Where does Diana stay when she visits Paris? Any place she can crash.
How is Princess Diana like breaking a bone? Both need a doctor to remove the plaster of paris.
What's the difference between Princess Diana and thirty-nine pennies? It's easier to scrape together thirty-nine pennies.
Why did Princess Diana cross the road? Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt.
What's the difference between Princess Diana an Casper the ghost? Casper can go through walls, Diana can't.
What's the difference between a Mercedes and Princess Diana? A Mercedes will easily reach 40.
What would Di be doing if she were alive today? Scratching at the lid of her coffin.
Yes I am a horrible person wow.
St. Peter tells the nuns, "since you've all dedicated your lives to God, we will let you go back and live as anyone you'd like to."
The first nun says, "I'd like to be Mother Theresa", and Peter says, "No problem."
The second nun says, "I'd like to return as Princess Diana", and Peter says, "Sure thing."
The third nun says, "I'd like to be Sarah Pippilini." St. Peter says, "I'm sorry sister but I don't know who that is." The nun holds up a newspaper and points to the headline.
St. Peter laughs and says, "No, no sister that doesn't say 'Sarah Pippilini'; it says 'Sahara Pipeline laid by 500 men in 7 days'."
garglgarglgarglgarglgargl
You tell him that the princess is in another castle.
An engineer was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess".
He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket.
The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week."
The engineer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket.
The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you and do ANYTHING you want."
Again the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket.
Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess, that I'll stay with you for a week and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?"
The engineer said, "Look I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog, now that's cool."
Cops found her head and shoulders in the glove compartment.
A man takes his girlfriend out on a date, and as they are leaving he says "I'm going to treat you like a princess".
So they jump in his Mercedes and he drives into a wall.
One of them has a good driver.
You can explore princess princesses reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean princess meghan dad jokes. There are also princess puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Inertia.
Pink Floyd kept going after the wall.
She spends most of her time on the dashboard.
So we made her marry a man she never met in order to secure a French alliance.
I guess I'll Triforce next time.
She was looking in Alderaan places.
I don't think she has any games though, all she does is spend all day on the dashboard...
They found her head and shoulders under the steering wheel.
By saying Alderaan things.
so I made her marry a man she has never met before in order to secure an alliance with France.
So I married her off to a stranger in order to secure an alliance with the French.
So I put her in the back of my car and crashed it into a tunnel
Darth Vader.
"So I breka up with tha princess last night. But I told her, it's a not you, it's a me! Mario!"
she notices that Princess Diana has a bigger halo than her. So Mother Teresa goes to God and asks why Princess Diana has a larger halo. God laughs and responds, "Oh, that's not a halo, that's the steering wheel."
My grandmother told me this joke, all credit to her.
A man takes his wife out to dinner one night. The wife says, "I want you to treat me like a princess." The husband drives his Mercedes into a wall.
Kingdom come
raPUNzel
*sits there laughing to self*
...so lonely..
She didn't wear a seatbelt.
She's all over the dashboard!
Their last big hit was the wall.
So he flew me to Paris, got me drunk, and drove me into a tunnel pillar at 105 km/h.
Momentum.
Peach, we've been together a long time, I've saved you countless times, but I just can't go on any longer.
But I want you to know, it's not you, itsa me, Mario.
So I put them in the back of a Mercedes and drove into a wall.
So I married her off to a stranger twice her age to strengthen my alliance with France
And the steering wheel, and the dashboard, and the windshield...
She offered her honor.
He honored her offer.
All night long, it was
Honor, and Offer.
So I hired paparazzi to follow her and she died in a car accident.
Princess Diana couldn't stop either.
So I put her into the back of my Mercedes and drove it into a wall.
So I forced her into a marriage with a man she'd never met so that I could make an alliance with Poland.
He enters, and says "Your Majesty, I kept my word. Here's the head of the dragon!" and takes the head of the dragon out of the bag.
A royal advisor brings a bag to the king. The king replies "Well, then, I kept my word too. Here's the hand of the princess!"
So I used her as bait to lure an Italian plumber into my castle
So it doesn't Hang Solow
Both their greatest hits was the wall
It says "Kiss me and I will become a princess". But he just puts she into his jacket and keeps on working.
During Lunch the frog jumps out of his jacket and says again "Kiss me and I will become your princess". But he just puts her back again.
In the evening he shows her to a friend and she asks "Why won't you kiss me?" - "I don't have time for a girlfriend but a talking frog is funny."
Unbelievable!
Darth Braider
(I know, I know. She's a kid though. Lol)
It's now three hours later, the police are annoyed and she *still* won't say where she got them...
Riding solo - Jason Derulo
"It was absolutely delicious, honey! Thank you so much, princess." says the man to his wife in the kitchen. "Could you please fetch us two beers later, baby?"
His friend says: "It is very cute that you still have nicknames for her after so long time."
The man responds: "Well, I forgot her name like three years ago, so I give her nicknames to cover it up. But seriously don't tell her, amigo!"
It's not you... it's a me, Mario!
It's now three hours later, the police are annoyed and she *still* won't say where she got them...
Her mother is a royal pain.
She was looking for love in Alderaan places.
So I arranged her marriage with Philip VI of Valois to strengthen the alliance with France.
So I took her to Paris.
We went to wonderful restaurants and stayed in an expensive hotel.
Then I crashed our car in a tunnel and she died.
Peach: Is it me? Is it my fault?
Mario: No, it's-a not-a you, it's-a me, Mario!
They all lie about there being cake.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the princess commoner jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working princess rey piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.