The Best 19 Priceless Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Priceless jokes. There are some priceless cherish jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these priceless costly puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Priceless Jokes and Puns

I just saw a cashier scan the eyes of a customer with her barcode reader for being rude.

The look on his face was priceless.

Box of condoms = $6.99

Cashier's face when you ask where the fitting room is = Priceless

Art Thief

An art thief pulls off an incredible heist at the Louvre. He loads a bunch of priceless paintings in the back of his van and drives off.

He is about to make the perfect getaway when his van suddenly stops. The authorities nab him, and one of them asks "what happened to the van?"

The thief replies:

"I did not have the Monet

to buy Degas

to make the Van Gogh"

Priceless joke, Art Thief

After I stole the priceless statue and turned the corner, I collided into the female security guard's chest...

...It was a huge bust.

When my doctor told me my plastic surgery was free of charge...

the look on my face was priceless.

Once upon a time

...there was a Chieftain who presided over a community that lived in the steppe, where everything was grassland as far as the eye could see, and almost no trees grew. Because of its rarity, wood was prized, and this Chieftain happened to own a large, ornate chair made of wood that was his most priceless possession.

Now in this community it was c

My Dad actually said this is a Denver area Pizza Hut.

A group of maybe 6\-8 of us were finishing up our meal when a rather large woman \(our waitress\) came over and asked my dad if "we wanna box for our left over pizza?" Without skipping a beat, my dad looks her right in the eye and says "no, but I'll wrestle ya for it!". The look on her face was priceless!

Priceless joke, My Dad actually said this is a Denver area Pizza Hut.

Serena Williams was fined $17k

Verbal abuse of the umpire: $10,000

Being warned for coaching: $4,000

Breaking her racket: $3,000

Stealing the moment from Osaka by calling the umpire a thief: Priceless

Unsuccessful marketers vs successful marketers

Unsuccessful marketer: "This item has no value."
Successful marketer: "This item is priceless."

I bumped into a guy in a supermarket yesterday.

He cursed me and told me not to walk like an idiot.

I told him, I'm sorry, but I haven't possessed a human body in a long time.

The look on his face was priceless.

Elon Musk's new MasterCard Ad.

Getting a person to Mars?: $100,000.
Getting them back?: Priceless.

You can explore priceless jewel reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean priceless hypnotize dad jokes. There are also priceless puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

My friend once taught me a priceless lesson about the word "many"

To me, it meant a lot.

I told a girl with no face that she was faceless

The look on her face was priceless

Dear Diary, I've got the best April fool's day prank planned for my friends.

I'm going to fake my death and return as a zombie! The looks on their faces will be priceless lolololol.


i just bought a rape whistle...

and the look on my victims faces is priceless.

Necklace - $10,000

Earrings - $5,000

New Car - $30,000

Let's do it today - Priceless

Priceless joke, Necklace - $10,000

What's the difference between a feminist and a bomb?

A feminist is priceless for we are all unique and created equal

Actual Critic

Armani blazer: 20k
Gucci shoes: 15k
Tag Heuer watch: 50k
Friend meets you and says "Looking Idiot" - Priceless

MasterCard Commercial

***Pregnancy Tests***

$20 at the grocery store, $1 at the dollar store

Waiting to find out?


Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the priceless handmade jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working priceless cheapest piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes