Preschool Jokes

36 preschool jokes and hilarious preschool puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about preschool that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Get ready to laugh out loud with these hilarious preschool jokes! From April Fool's Day to Thanksgiving Day, we've collected the best jokes your little ones can hear during playtime. We've also got some witty quips perfect for your kindergartener, teacher, or anyone else in your congregation. You'll find something funny for every season, so explore our collection of preschool jokes today!

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Funniest Preschool Short Jokes

Short preschool jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The preschool humour may include short pre school jokes also.

  1. What's the difference between a pakistani preschool and Isis headquarters? I don't know man I just fly the drones
  2. Whats the difference between a preschool and a taliban camp? I don't know man. I just fly the drones.
  3. What's the difference between a weapons factory and a Palestinian preschool? I don't know, I just pilot the drone.
  4. What's the difference between a Middle Eastern preschool and an ISIS training camp? I have no idea, I just fly the drone
  5. I pulled my kid out of pre-school because they were indoctrinating him into a socialist liberal mindset Today, his teacher was teaching him how to share.
  6. A preschool teacher is teaching a student basic geography Teacher: "what state do you live in?"
    Student: "denial."
  7. What do elves learn in preschool? Not the elf-abet, no; they don't learn anything because they don't exist.
  8. What's the difference between a physician and a preschool teacher? One has a job with patients, the other has the patience of Job.
  9. My preschooler hit me with this one today: Why did the girl bring a tool kit to her room? Someone told her to make her bed!
  10. If Laywers learn at pre-law but Doctors learn at pre-med, where do Teachers learn at? Pre-school

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Preschool One Liners

Which preschool one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with preschool? I can suggest the ones about kindergarten and primary school.

  1. A preschooler refused to sleep during naptime... He was charged with resisting a rest
  2. What's accounting? Something Italians learn in preschool.
  3. What's got four legs and one arm? An attack dog in a preschool.
  4. What's the most racist thing you can say in preschool? I'm faster then you.
  5. Crop Circles are Chuck Norris's preschool art projects.
  6. Yo momma is so old she sat next to Moses in preschool.
  7. Pre-schoolers are like black holes. They draw in everything around them.
  8. Yo momma so poor.... She stole macaroni from your preschool sculptures to use for dinner.
  9. What's big, blue, and eats rocks? A very sad fat preschooler.
  10. What do you call a s**... kid in pre-school? Names.

Preschool Teacher Jokes

Here is a list of funny preschool teacher jokes and even better preschool teacher puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Johnny was a preschool student who did not know grammar or math very well. While in class, his teacher asked: "what's 2+2?"
    Johnny answered: "I four get."
  • In preschool, I became friends with a little girl I showed her mine, and she showed me hers. However, a preschool teacher found out about it, and I was fired.
  • What did the pre-school math teacher have to say about her students? Every single one counts.
Preschool joke, What did the pre-school math teacher have to say about her students?

Comedy Preschool Jokes to Make Your Friends Giggle

What funny jokes about preschool you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean nursery jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make preschool pranks.

A prisoner spent a month digging an escape tunnel and finally came out in the playground of a preschool.

He jumped around with excitement yelling "I'm free, I'm free". A small girl looked up at him and said, "Big b**... deal, I'm four".

caught my wife of 7 years cheating with my best friend.

I caught my wife of 7 years cheating with my best friend, whom I had known since preschool. I can't believe they'd do this to me.
Listen, I'm not a bad guy. I'll grant you that my wife was upset that I was always beating her, and my best friend? He was simply jealous of how much money and property I had.
At my wit's end, I was so angry that when I caught them, I flipped the game board over and left them to pick up all the pieces.

Ugly Faces

One fine day in a preschool....
Child: -makes ugly faces-
Teacher: Stop it
Child: Why?
Teacher: When I was your age, my teacher told me if I make ugly faces, it'll stay that way
Child: Oh, you didn't listen did you?

A middle-aged teacher named Mrs. Jackson saw one of her first grade boys making rude faces at the preschoolers on the playground

She said "You know, Liam, when I was a little girl I was told that if I made ugly faces it might freeze and stay like that."
Liam replied "Well sorry Mrs. Jackson, but you can't say you weren't warned.

A prisoner spends years digging a tunnel out of jail ...

He comes up inside a preschool yard. He starts jumping up and down and screaming "I'm free!! I'm free!!"
A little kid tugs on his pants. The prisoner looks down and the kid says nonchalantly: "So what? I'm four."

My 3 year old told me a joke on our way home from pre-school.

From her car seat yells up to me, "Knock knock, Daddy!"
Who's there?
Little old lady.
Little old lady who?
I didn't know you could yodel!!

I was talking via sign language with a one armed man…

Problem is I was only getting half of what he was saying.
Thought this up yesterday on a camping trip when my daughter was showing me what she learned at preschool.

What's the difference between a preschool and a t**... training camp?

Don't ask me...I just fly the drones!

Little Johnny's preschool class went on a field trip to the fire station.

The firefighter giving the presentation held up a smoke detector and asked the class: "Does anyone know what this is?"

Little Johnny's hand shot up and the firefighter called on him.

Little Johnny replied: "That's how Mommy knows supper is ready!"

I just bought an undiscovered Stradivarius and an original Rembrandt!

Unfortunately, on further investigation I was able to discover that Rembrandt made useless violins and Stradivarius painted like a pre-schooler.

Timmy Learns to Count

A preschool teacher asked her students in class, "who can count from one to ten?"
Little 3-year old Timmy swiftly raised his hand, "I can!" and started counting "one, two, three four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten!"
The teacher is impressed, "Well done Timmy! Who taught you that?"
"My uncle Bobby!" Timmy said.
"Can you count past ten?" The teacher asked Timmy.
"That's easy!" Timmy continued, "Jack, Queen, King..."

Preschool joke, Timmy Learns to Count