Preist Jokes
24 preist jokes and hilarious preist puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about preist that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Preist Short Jokes
Short preist jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The preist humour may include short admit jokes also.
- a rabbi, a preist & a monk walk into a bar and the bartender say's ''not these guys again''.
- Three preists are in a shower And one of them... Nevermind it's just one priest and two children.
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Preist One Liners
Which preist one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with preist? I can suggest the ones about faith and orthodox.
- Did You Hear About The Preist That Was A Fish? Holy Carp! There he is
- Guy walks up to girl "Wanna play church? I'll be the preist you be the altarboy"
- A Preist, a Rabbi and a Terroist walk into a bar, BOOM
- What's the differnce between a preist and a pimple? a pimple doesn't tell overused jokes
- What do you call a skateboarding preist? Righteous.
- So a r**..., a preist, a drug addict walk into a bar... He orders a child.
Preist Jokes to Giggle and Enjoy A Night of Unforgettable Laughter
What funny jokes about preist you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean confessional jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make preist pranks.
A teenager girl goes for confession and tells the preist that she's pregnant with the second coming.
Naturally, the priest is furious at the implied blasphemy.
"How dare you? That's blasphemy. Explain yourself. How do you know you're pregnant with the second coming?" he thundered.
I... I... I.. I swallowed the first.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
U know why Christians call the preist 'Father' ?
Cuz calling them Daddy would be too suspicious.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Rabbi, a Preist, and a Monk walk into a bar
The Rabbi orders a drink and says, I'm sick of hearing the same old jokes about us recycled over and over again to which the Priest replies, I completely agree! The template is just dragged out and overused. I'd like to see someone try to make a joke about the three of us in a bar that is new. The monk sits back for a moment and then says how about this one?
The wish.
One day, a married couple walked into a temple. The preist said "today is a fortunate day for praying, you both pray to god and ask a wish each and it will be granted"
The Wife prays "God, I hope me and my husband stay together for 7 lives"
Husband after listening this, prays "God, may this be the seventh life of us staying together".
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the difference between a zit and a preist?
A zit waits untill youre 12 to come on your face
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A preist and a rabbi
Are out drinking together and the preist says " lets get some alter boys to screw." and the rabbi says "out of what? "
Four women were talking to one another about their sons, whom all were men of the cloth
The first woman said, "I'm so proud of my son. He's a monsignor, and when he enters the room, everyone calls him 'His Holiness.'" The second woman said, "My son is a Cardinal, and everyone calls him 'His Excellence' when he enters a room." The third woman said, "My son is a bishop, and when he enters a room, they say, 'His Emminence has entered the room.'" The fourth woman said, "My son is only a preist, but he's 6' 7" tall and 360 pounds and when he enters a room everyone says 'Oh my God!'"
A Pilot, a Scientist, a Preist and a Boy are on a plane...
The plane is going down fast, and there are only 3 parachutes.
The Pilot says, "I have a family with a wife, 3 wonderful kids and a grandchild on the way!"
So he takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane.
The Scientist says, "I am the smartest man on earth! I have to live!"
So he grabs another parachute and jumps off the plane.
The Priest then turns to the boy and says, "Son, I have lived my life. You should take the last parachute."
The boy responds, "It's okay, we can both live!"
The priest asks, "How is that?"
"Because the smartest man on earth just jumped off the plane with my backpack!"
A rabbi and a priest
A rabbi Asked a priest:
>Could you ever be promoted in your church?
The priest answered,
>Well, I could become a bishop
The Rabbi asked,
>And then?
The preist said,
>Well, I suppose I could even be an archbishop
The rabbi said,
>And if you were to be promoted again?
The priest answered,
>Well, then I would be a cardinal
The rabbi inquired once again, to which the priest answered,
>I could become the Pope
The rabbi asked,
>And then?
The priest threw up his hands and said,
>what more could I become?
God himself?!
The rabbi calmly replied,
>One of our boys made it.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Preist & The Drunkard
A man flops down on a subway seat next to a priest. The man's tie is
stained, his face is plastered with red lipstick, and a half-empty
bottle of gin sticks out of his torn coat pocket.
He opens his newspaper and begins reading. After a few minutes, the
disheveled guy turns to the priest and asks, "Say, Father, what causes
arthritis?"
"It's caused by loose living, cheap women and too much alcohol!"
"Well, I'll be d**...!" the drunk mutters, returning to his paper.
The priest thinks about what he has said, nudges the man and apologizes.
"I'm very sorry. I shouldn't have been so unpleasant about it. Tell me,
how long have you had arthritis?"
"I don't have it, Father. I was just reading here that the pope does!"
A Catholic Priest and an Orthodox Rabbi are talking with one another...
The Priest says to the Rabbi, "Rabbi, you keep Kosher, correct?" To which the Rabbi replies, "Of course, father." The Priest then asks, "But have you ever broken kosher?" The Rabbi then says, "I admit that I have. When I was a young man I once indulged myself in ham, and in doing so broke Kosher." "That's very interesting," remarks the priest, "for I am free to eat as much ham as I please."
"What about you, father," begins the Rabbi, "you keep celibate, do you not?" The preist replies, "Of course, Rabbi." "But," continues the Rabbi, "have you always kept so?" The Preist then says, "I admit, I have not. When I was a young man I once shared the night with a woman."
The Rabbi then leans in and asks, "It's better than ham, isn't it?"
