Pregnant Girl Jokes
114 pregnant girl jokes and hilarious pregnant girl puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about pregnant girl that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Pregnant Girl Short Jokes
Short pregnant girl jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The pregnant girl humour may include short pregnant lady jokes also.
- My wife told me that she was pregnant with twin girls. I told her that I wanted to name the first one Kate. She asked what I wanted to name the second one. I answered Duplicate.
- So there's this girl named Mary... 1. Mary meets a guy named Joseph
2. Mary ends up pregnant
3. ???
4. Prophet - Doctor Am I pregnant? A lady goes to a doctor to find out if she is pregnant
Doc: Hmm, Looks like your Preganant...
Girl: Am I?
Doc: No it just looks like you are - After God created 24 hours of alternating darkness and light, one of the angels asked him, "what are you going to do now?" God said,
"I think I'm going to call it a day." - April Fools! girl: babe I'm pregnant you're the father
guy: can't fool me it's April's Fools Day!
girl: haha! got me! you're not the father - Why was the girl amazed at her ability to get pregnant from the world's smallest man? Because she didn't know she had it in her.
- Girl finds out that she's pregnant... And goes to tell her mum about it. Her mum asks; "Have you had a check-up?"
Girl says; "No, he was Polish" - Broom girl to broom boyfriend: sweetie, I'm pregnant… Broom boyfriend: But that's impossible! We haven't even swept together!
- You know when you lie, things can get out of hand very quickly....... For example I heard about a girl who lied to her husband about how she got pregnant and now there is an entire religion.
- I asked a pregnant woman if it's going to be a boy or a girl. "They're questioning," she replied.
Share These Pregnant Girl Jokes With Friends
Pregnant Girl One Liners
Which pregnant girl one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with pregnant girl? I can suggest the ones about pregnant woman and baby girl.
- My town never changes population. Everytime a girl gets pregnant, a guy leaves town.
- What are two things in the Air that can make a Girl pregnant Her legs...
- Why did the Latino girl come to class pregnant? Her teacher told her to do an essay.
- A mathematician was pregnant Her friend asked her:
- Boy or girl?
- Yes. - Socks and sandals are like condoms There is almost no chance of getting a girl pregnant
- I told my pregnant girl friend that she was as big as a 747. That did not fly.
- What spell does Harry Potter use when he gets a girl pregnant? FETUS DELETUS!!
- A girl tells a guy that she can't get pregnant... ...turns out that he wasn't lying.
- How do you get an Indian girl pregnant? Poppadom.
- 8 Months ago I got a girl pregnant. Shes still pregnant
- When your girl gets pregnant- B:Call me Snapchat G: why?
B: Cuz i'll be gone in 24 hours - What food can tell you if a girl is pregnant? Chickpea
- What do you call a pregnant girl A run on sentence
- What do you call a comedian that can't get a girl pregnant? Carl Barron
- Where is the most ironic place to get a girl pregnant? Abortion clinic.
Cheerful Fun Pregnant Girl Jokes for Lovely Laughter
What funny jokes about pregnant girl you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean young girl jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make pregnant girl pranks.
I know when god becomes angry.
When teenage girls get pregnant and their parents exclaim, "Oh god! What have you done?!"
When a woman found out that she was pregnant, she lit up the phone lines telling everyone the good news.
One day later that week, she took her 4 year old son, Sam, out shopping.
A woman asked the boy if he was excited about the baby.
"Yes", he said. "I know what we're going to name it.
If it is a girl, we're calling her Molly and if it is a boy, we're going to call it quits.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A very popular girl went to her doctor and found out that she was pregnant.
The doctor says, “I know that you are not married! Do you know who the father of this baby is?”
The girl thought and then asked, “Doc, if you ate a can of Baked Beans, would you know which bean made you f**...?”
At a dancing party a shy boy approached a girl and asked, "Will you dance with me, please?"
The arrogant girl says, "I don’t dance with a kid."
The taken back boy apologized, "I am sorry, I did not realize you were pregnant."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
One morning when I was going out of the house I met my neighbor's daughter who was pregnant.
When I returned home I saw her father closing the door.
I told him: "Your daughter hasn't married yet I wonder how it is possible a girl without any husband be pregnant?
For a moment her father with a bitter smile said: "She isn't pregnant; it is all wind in her belly. She farts and would recovery."
Next year perchance I saw the same girl with a baby in her arms.
Next day when I was going out facing her father so I told him: "I saw your daughter with her f**... in her arms."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Q: How do you know if a girl is pregnant?
A: Shove a t**... and see if all of the cotton is picked.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A woman pregnant with triplets goes into a grocery store and gets shot 3 times in the stomach during a robbery...
She is rushed to the hospital and all known tests are run on her. The doctor approaches her and tells her the children are all fine, but it's too late in the pregnancy to safely remove the bullets. They would fall out in their own time.
The woman gives birth to 3 healthy kids. Two girls, and a boy.
16 years later, the first little girl comes running in yelling "mommy mommy! I was peeing and a bullet fell out!"
The mother reassures her daughter and explains the story to her.
The next week, the second little girl comes running in yelling "mommy mommy! I was peeing and a bullet fell out!"
So again, the mother reassures her daughter and explains the story.
The next week, the boy comes in distraught. There are tears running down his face and he is crying hard.
The mother takes a look at him worried and says "let me guess, you were peeing and a bullet fell out?"
The boy responds "no! I was m**... and I shot the dog!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A blond, a brunette and a redhead, all three pregnant, are in the waiting room of their OBI-GYN . . .
and they are chatting about what motherhood is going to be like. The talk drifts to whether they think their respective babies will be boys or girls. "Well," said the redhead, "I wouldn't be surprised if I had a boy, since whenever my partner and I have s**..., he's always on top and I heard that makes for a boy." The brunette says, "If that's the case, then I must be going to have a girl, since when my partner and I have s**..., I'm always on top." The blond starts to sniffle, then bursts out crying. The other two ask her what's wrong. "Oh no!" the blond wails. "I'm going to have a puppy!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A young woman's car broke down in the deep South.
She realized that there was no way to get back to the city that night, so she walked over to the nearest farm house and asked the man there if she could stay over for the night.
The farmer scratched his head and said, "Well, I sure don't see no problem with this, just don't bother my two sons Joe Bob and Billy."
The woman assured him that she wouldn't, but that night she snuck into the boys' shared room and said, "Hey boys, want to have some fun?" They, being teenage boys, readily agreed.
The girl first held up two condoms and said, "Now boys, before we get started, you both gotta put on a rubber. I don't want to be getting pregnant, now!" They both complied and the t**... had s**... all night long. The woman left the next day, and they never saw each other again.
Twenty years later, Joe Bob and Billy sat on their rocking chairs on the porch. Joe Bob turned to Billy.
"Billy?"
"Yeah Joe Bob?"
"Remember that fine lady that visited us that one time?"
"Sure do."
"Do you care if she gets pregnant?"
"Sure don't."
"Me either. Let's take these danged things off."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So God's getting ready to go on vaction...
And he's packing his bag and an angel comes up and asks, "So, where are you going to go for your vacation?" And God says, "Huh, not Earth again, last time I went there I got this Jewish girl pregnant and they haven't stopped talking about it since!'
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Not Pregnant
A mother took her daughter to the doctor and asked him to give her an examination to determine the cause of her daughters swollen abdomen. It only took the doctor about 2 seconds to say "Your daughter is pregnant."
The mother turned red with fury and she argued with the doctor that her daughter was a good girl and would not compromise her reputation by having s**... with a boy. The doctor faced the window and silently watched the horizon.
The mother became enraged and screamed, "Quit looking out the window! Aren't you paying attention to me?"
"Yes, of course I am paying attention ma'am. It's just that the last time this happened, a star appeared in the East, and three wise men came. I was hoping that they would show up again."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What a relief!
I went out with this one girl, and she scared me. One day she says to me "Soon you're gonna hear the pitter-patter of little feet!" and I'm thinking, "Oh Lord, she's pregnant"...
She ended up leaving me for a midget.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Be careful of your aim
A woman was pregnant with triplets.
One day she goes into this bank as it was being held up. She gets shot 3 times in her stomach, but luckily she lives.
She goes to the doctor who tells her that her children will be all right, and that one day the bullets will come out.
So 13 years later, one triplet, a girl, runs out of the bathroom and says "MOM, MOM, I WAS GOING TO THE BATHROOM AND A BULLET CAME OUT!" So the mother tells her the story.
The next day the second daughter comes out and says the same thing, "MOM, I WAS GOING TO THE BATHROOM AND A BULLET CAME OUT!"
On the third day the son comes out and says "MOM, MOM!" So she goes, "Let me guess, you were going to the bathroom and a bullet came out?" he replies "No, I was jerking off and I shot the dog!"
Twins
A pregnant woman was involved in a car accident and fell into a coma. When she awoke days later she realized she was no longer carrying a child, and asked, "Doc, what happened to my baby?!"
The doctor replied, "Calm down ma'am, you gave birth to healthy twins! You're the proud mother of a handsome baby boy and a beautiful baby girl. Also, you should know that while you were in a coma, your brother named the children for you."
"Oh, no!" shrieked the woman. "Not my brother! He's not really all together, if you know what I mean!"
The doctor replied, "Well, ma'am, your brother named your daughter Denise."
"Oh, that's no so bad," smiled the woman. Then, hesitantly, she asked, "What's the boy's name?"
The doctor grinned and said, "Denephew."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An Irish woman is 3 months pregnant...
She gets into a car accident and falls into a coma.
After nearly six months, she wakes up to find that she is no longer pregnant.
Frantically, she asks the doctor about her baby.
The doctor replies, "You had twins! A boy and a girl. The babies are grand. Luckily your brother named them!"
"Oh no, not my brother, he's a feckin eejit!" she says.
She asks the doctor, "Well, what's the girl's name?"
"Denise," the doctor says.
"That's not so bad, what's the boy's name?" she asks the doctor.
"Denephew."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A pregnant lady is sitting at a bus stop...
A guy walks up and asks, "what are you expecting?"
The girl replies the obvious, "the bus."
The man turns to his friend and whispers, "dude, I think she s**... a transformer!"
A woman was in labor...
So there's this guy and his pregnant wife right? Well, the wife is pregnant with twins. One day, the soon-to-be-mother goes in labor and her husband takes her to the hospital, along with the wife's brother. While she's having the twins, she passes out, and so does the husband. The next day, she realizes she and her husband passed out, and the only one around to name the twins was her brother. Worried because her brother was quite the prankster she asks the nurse "What did he name the babies?" The nurse replies "Well he named the girl Denice." "Oh that's a nice name. What about my son?" And then, the nurse trying not to laugh, responds "He named your son Denephew."
A Pregnant women gets in a car wreck....
...and fell into a coma. When she awoke a few days later, she noticed that she wasn't carrying a child, and asked the doctor, "Doctor, what happened to my baby!?"
The doctor replies, "It's all okay. You gave birth to beautiful twins, a boy and a girl. But we needed someone to name them, so your brother came in and gave them their names."
The woman is surprised. "No, not my brother! He's not the smartest guy in the world."
"Well ma'am, he named your daughter Denise," the doctor said.
"Oh, that's not too bad. What's the boy's name?"
"Denephew."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A lady almost 9 months pregnant falls down some stairs and knocks herself out...
When she wakes up, she is in a hospital bed.
Doctor: "We had to deliver your fraternal twins while you slept, but they are completely healthy. Also, your brother stopped by and named them for you"
New Mother: "My brother named them? But he's an idiot! What are their names?"
Doctor: "Well, the little girl is named Denise."
New Mother: "Well, that's not so bad. What about my son?"
Doctor: "Denephew."
A woman pregnant with triplets catches three stray bullets from a drive-by shooting.
In the emergency room, a doctor tells her she and her unborn children will be fine but they could not remove the bullets. He informs her all is well and the children, two girls and a boy, will pee the bullets out in around 16 years.
So around the 16th year, the mother is in the kitchen making her morning coffee when one her daughters runs in, frantic and concerned.
"Mom! Mom! I was peeing and a bullet came out!"
Her mother tells her there's nothing to worry about and tells her the story.
Then around noon, the mother is in the garden watering some flowers when the other daughter comes outside and says
"Mom! Mom! I was peeing and a bullet came out!" The mother explains everything and goes back to watering.
That night the mother was laying in bed reading when her son burst into her room.
"Mom! Mom! I was-"
"Let me guess, you were peeing and a bullet came out?"
"No, no!" says the son, "I was jacking off and I shot the dog!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Computer diagnosis
One day, Pete complained to his friend, "My elbow really hurts. I guess I should see a doctor."
His friend said, "Don't do that. There's a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor.
Simply put in a sample of your u**..., and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about and it will only cost you $10.00."
Pete figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a u**... sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10.00.
The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing. After a brief pause, out popped a small slip of paper which read:
1. You have tennis elbow.
2. Soak your arm in warm water, avoid heavy labor.
3. It will be better in two weeks.......
That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this computer could be fooled.
He decided to give it a try. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, and u**... samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he m**... into the concoction.
He went back to the drug store, located the computer, poured in the sample and deposited the $10.00. The machine again made the usual noises, flashed its alights, and printed out the following analysis:
1. Your tap water is too hard.
2. Get a water softener.
3. Your dog has ringworm.
4. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.
5. Your daughter is using c**....
6. Put her in a rehabilitation clinic.
7. Your wife is pregnant ....... twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
8. And if you don't stop m**..., your elbow will never get better.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A 3 months pregnant woman falls into a coma...
6 months later she awakes and she asks her doctor about her babies. And he replies
"Oh you had happy healthy twins. One boy, and one girl. Luckily your brother was here to name then"
"Oh god no" says the woman "my brothers an idiot. What are their names"
"The girls name is denise" says the doctor
"Oh thats not to bad, and the boy?"
"Denephew"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why don't smart girls ever get pregnant?
Because they use their head.
I used the word "procreate" at work today...
... and a pregnant girl asked me what it meant.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I got a girl pregnant in high school.
Her son grew to be 6 foot 7 (200 cm). Biggest mistake I ever made.
My girlfriend is officially a professional actress
So my my girl friend has always dreamed of bring an actress and just recently got her first acting job and I am so proud of her. Be sure to look for her on 16 and Pregnant!
A somali girl found a chickpea and ate it..
..her family disowned her they thought she was pregnant.
My dad's go to joke...
So there's a blonde, a brunette, and a red head who are all pregnant. A man walks up to the brunette and asks what gender she is having. She replies saying "well I was on top so I'm having a boy!' He then asks the red head what gender her baby is and she replies "well I was on the bottom so I'm having a girl!' He then asks the blonde what she is having and she says 'Oh my god! I must be having puppies!'
Catholic girl goes into confessional
Catholic girl goes into the confessional & says to the priest,
"I think I am pregnant."
He asks, "How did this happen my child?"
"I think it must be the second coming," she replies.
The priest shocked by this statement asks, "What makes you think it
is the second coming?"
She replies, "Because I swallowed the first."
Third grade teacher to her class: "Who can use the word 'beautiful' twice in the same sentence?"
Suzy raises her hand and says: "The girl has a beautiful new dress and she looks beautiful in it."
Teacher: "Very good Suzy. Okay, Billy."
Billy: "When my sister told our father that she was pregnant, he said "Beautiful, just beautiful."
Coma Pregnancy
A woman is in an accident while she's pregnant. While in a coma she has twins, a boy & a girl.
When she woke up she asked the doctor where her baby was. The doctor said she had twins but her brother named them.
She replied,My brother is an idiot I wonder what names he gave them. Anyway what did he name the girl?
"Denise", replied the doctor. That's not so bad.What about the boy?, she asked. "Denephew"
You have to be really sneaky to get a girl pregnant
The trick is to never let them know that you're coming.
A woman is pregnant with twins.
A woman is pregnant with twins. During her last month of pregnancy, she falls into a coma. When she wakes up, the doctor tells her that she had a girl and a boy, and that her brother claimed them until she came to. Immediately, she panics at the thought of her brother supervising her newborns.
"What did he name them?" She asks anxiously.
"He named the girl Denise", the doctor says.
That's not too bad, she thought, relieved. "What did he name my son?"
"Denephew."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A woman who is 3 months pregnant falls into a deep coma. 6 months later, she wakes up and asks the doctor about her baby.
Doctor: You had twins, a girl and a boy. Fortunately, your brother was there to name them for you.
Woman: Oh no, not my brother! He's an idiot! What did he name the girl?
Doctor: Denise.
Woman: Well, that isn't so bad. What did he name the boy?
Doctor: Denephew.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My daughter is a good girl
A mother took her daughter to the doctor and asked him to give her an examination to determine the cause of the daughter's swollen abdomen. It only took the doctor about 2 seconds to say, "Gimme a break, lady! Your daughter is pregnant!" The mother turn red with fury, and she argued with the doctor that *her* daughter was a good girl, and would *never* compromise her reputation by having s**... with a boy. The doctor faced the window and silently watched the horizon.
The mother became enraged and screamed, "Quit looking out the window! Aren't you paying attention to me?"
"Yes, of course I am paying attention, ma'am. It's just that the last time this happened, a star appeared in the east, and three wise men came. I was hoping they'd show up again, and help me figure out who got your daughter pregnant!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Never Forget
Girl: Can you finger me?
Boy: Sure.
Girl: Oh yeah that feels good.
--------- 1 Day Later -----------
Girl: I'm pregnant.
Boy: d**... I forgot to wash my hands.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Did you know Chewbacca got a girl pregnant the first time he had s**...
It was a Wookie mistake
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A woman wakes up from a coma and...
A 4-months-pregnant woman falls into a deep coma. 5 months later she wakes up and asks the doctor about her baby.
Doctor: You had twins, a boy and a girl, and they are perfectly fine. Luckily your brother named them for you.
Woman: Oh no not my brother! He's an idiot. What did he name the my daughter?
Doctor: Denise
Woman: Oh that's not that bad. What did he name my son?
Doctor: Denephew
Might be their last one...
At school one day the teacher said to one of her students "So Johnny, I hear your mom is pregnant."
"Yep," said Johnny, "And I know what they are going to name it."
"Really," said the teacher, "what are they going to name it?"
"Well," he said, "If it's a girl, they are going to name it Charlene, and if it's a boy like me they are going to call it Quits."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I just had s**... with a pregnant girl
and told my buddies I had a t**...
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I'm pregnant...
A girl calls her boyfriend nervously. "j**..., I'm pregnant..." There's a long pause before the boy replies"...hi pregnant, I'm dad." Another awkward paid follows before she replies "Actually..."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How do you make a Vietnamese girl pregnant and rich at the same time?
Give her the d**....
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A pregnant woman goes into a coma
A pregnant woman goes into a coma moments after she gives birth to twins, one boy and one girl.
When she finally wakes up several days later, she cries out frantically to see her children.
The doctors come to her, and the first thing she asks is "How are my children?"
"Fine" says the doctor, "your brother named them".
She thinks to herself, "Oh no!" "My brother's an idiot" and she asks the doctor "What did he name them?"
The doctor says "He named the girl Denise"
And she thinks, Well, maybe I misjudged my brother... Denise isn't such a bad name"
What did he name the boy?"
Replies the doctor "De nephew."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Chinese girl was pregnant at the age of 14. Her name was
Sum Yong h**....
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So I was having s**... with a pregnant girl
She screamed "THE BABY'S COMING!"
I screamed "SO AM I!!"
What's in a name?
A pregnant woman lapses into a coma. She awakens and frantically calls for her doctor. "You had twins, a boy and a girl. They're fine," he says. "Your brother named them."
Oh, no, the new mother thinks. He's an idiot. Expecting the worst, she asks, "What's the girl's name?"
"Denise," the doctor says.
Not bad, she thinks. I guess I was wrong about him. "And the boy?"
"DeNephew."
A blonde, brunette, and redhead are each pregnant and at the doctor's office...
While sitting in the waiting area, they begin chatting.
The brunette says "I was on the bottom so I'm having a girl!"
The redhead says "I was on top so I'm having a boy!"
The blonde starts crying hysterically.
The brunette and redhead ask her what's wrong.
The blonde says "I'm going to have a puppy!"
Three Pregnant Ladies
Three Pregnant Ladies are discussing their unborn babies.
The Brunette says "I am having a girl because I was on the bottom when my partner and I conceived"
The Redhead says "I am having a boy as I was on top with my partner"
The Blonde starts crying and the other two ask what is wrong "I am going to be having ten puppies!"
Guy gets woman pregnant.
Her: "hey Babe I'm pregnant! I can't wait to see if it will be a boy or a girl! What would you want it to be?"
Him: "A Joke!..."
*sarcastically* "What do you want it to be!?"
Her:"YOURS!"
3 cousins are together talking about their names. The first, a raven haired beauty, says "when my mother was pregnant a rose fell from a bush and landed on her stomach so she named me Rose".
The second, a beautiful blonde, says, "when my mother was pregnant a violet landed on her stomach, so she named me Violet".
She turns to the 3rd cousin, a small crippled girl in a wheelchair, "how did u get your name, Piano??".
Two pregnant women are talking about their future babies
"I feel like my girl will be an athlete, she kicks so much in there it's unbelieavable!"
"Oh, I'm sure mine will be a comedian."
"How can you be so sure?"
"You wouldn't get it. It's an inside joke."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
After s**......
Guy: I think we should have used a c**....
Girl: No problem, I can't get pregnant...
Guy: Whew!
Girl: ...because of my AIDS medicine.
Jim had a pregnant wife who was soon to give birth.
One day, he's on his way home from work, when he gets the call that his wife has gone into labour. In a panic, he races to get to the hospital, but swerves his car and crashes into the ditch. When he wakes up, he finds himself in the hospital, with his brother Jack, an irascible practical joker, leaning over his bed.
Your wife's fine, and she gave birth to two healthy twins, a boy and a girl. The doctors needed names, so I had to name them."
Jim was wary. What'd you name them?
I named the girl Denise, Jack said.
That's a good name, Jim breathed out a sigh of relief. What'd you name the boy?
Denephew.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's so great about pregnant girls?
When you have s**... with her, it's basically a t**...
My mom always told me if I got a girl pregnant I would have to marry her. But what she doesn't know won't kill her.
But it will kill the baby.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My town's population has remained constant over the last 30 years.
Whenever a girl gets pregnant, a guy skips town.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why is it so easy for girls in the navy to get pregnant?
Because there's so many s**....
My wife is Indian, i'm Hispanic, she's pregnant with a girl and we felt it kick for the first time today.
Guess we're having a kickin' chica masala.
A doctor told a girl from Alabama that she was pregnant.
She said, "Doc, I've been sleeping around so much, I'm not sure it's mine."
My girlfriend is pregnant and everyone keeps asking if I want it to be a boy or a girl.
To be honest, I just hope it's black. Then I can go back to being selfish.
A woman who is a month pregnant falls into a deep coma. Three months after giving birth, she awakes and asks the doctor about her baby...
Doctor: Well, I have good news and bad news for you. Which would you like to hear first?
Woman: Of course, the good news.
Doctor: You had twins, both girls, and they're both fine. Luckily, your brother was here to name them.
Woman: Oh, that drummer... What did he name the girls?
Doctor: Anna 1, Anna 2
A teenager girl goes for confession and tells the preist that she's pregnant with the second coming.
Naturally, the priest is furious at the implied blasphemy.
"How dare you? That's blasphemy. Explain yourself. How do you know you're pregnant with the second coming?" he thundered.
I... I... I.. I swallowed the first.
Two pregnant women on a bench were talking to each other.
They saw a fat guy with a big belly. On seeing the fat guy, one said, " I will give birth to a handsome boy." On this the other said, " I will give birth to you a beautiful girl."
With intention to make fun of the guy , they asked the fat guy, "What are you gonna give birth to?"
He said I am gonna give birth to a young elephant and drops his pants.
" See, the trunk's coming out".
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My friend got a girl pregnant when they were in high school. Their son grew to be 6 feet 7 inches tall.
Biggest mistake they ever made.
