Nobody expects the Spanish ink precision.
No one expects the Spanish ink precision
People are amazed at how good the tattoo artists are in Spain........
They weren't expecting the Spanish ink precision
After the standard round of interviews, a good dozen of applicants sit before the director of the CIA office.
"Trust is central to our business, ladies and gentlemen. Still, intelligence, precision and punctuality are nearly as essential. So, to the test: You have an envelope with a coded address on it. It contains important top secret data for someone in this office building. Get this sensitive information to him."
The applicants scurry away with their red labeled envelopes, each trying to crack the code and simultaneously making their way through the labyrinthine vastness of the CIA office building.
Only one applicant rounds the corner and, after looking left and right, breaks the "TOP SECRET" seal and rips open the envelope. Inside, he finds a sheet of paper, that says: "Misuse of trust is central to our business. Come back to my office to sign your contract."
A doctor, an engineer, and a soldier are walking in the woods with their dogs on a duck hunting trip.
Suddenly, a group of ducks fly up into the air. The doctor pulls out his precision rifle...BANG! BANG! BANG! Three ducks fall from the sky. The doctor yells "Scalpel, fetch!". His dog runs up, skins the three ducks, and lays them down at the doctors feet. The other two are impressed. "He must take after his owner", they decide.
A few minutes later, another group of ducks takes flight. The engineer pulls out his specially designed laser rifle- BZZZZZ! Three ducks fall, smoking, from the sky. The engineer yells "Ruler, fetch!" His dog runs out, grabs the three ducks, and lays them down at his feet in a perfect equilateral triangle. The other two men are impressed; "that dog must take after his owner", they decide.
A few hundred meters farther on, another group of ducks is startled into the air. The soldier pulls out his Machine Gun- BLAMBLAMBLAMBLAMBLAM! Three ducks fall, riddled with holes, from the sky. The soldier yells "Grunt, fetch!" The dog runs out, eats the ducks, fucks the other two dogs, then requests a leave of absence.
Nobody expects the Spanish ink precision.
Nobody expects the Spanish ink precision.
An Air Force Major is just finishing up at a urinal when a Marine Corp Captain enters the bathroom. As the Marine is peeing, the Air Force officer makes a show of carefully soaping and scrubbing his hands with military precision. Just as the Air Force Major is drying off his hands, the Marine flushes and heads for the door.
"You know, in the Air Forces they teach us that you should always wash your hands after you pee," says the Air Force Major.
"Really?" replies the Marine. "In the Corp they just teach us not to pee on our hands."
If you have unknown troops in front of you and you want to find out who they are, fire a few rounds in their direction.
If you are met with precision machine gun fire, they're German.
If you are met by a volley of precision rifle fire, they are British.
If they surrender, they're Italian.
If there is a mass wave of infantry and tanks, they're Russian.
If there is a bayonet and sword charge, they're Japanese.
If everything is quiet for a minute or two, and suddenly you are in the middle of a massive artillery barrage and air strikes, they are American.
A group of Austrians, embarrassed of the Swiss engineers, approach them with a request to build a bridge in the Sahara. "We want to build the most beautiful bridge, with perfect precision, workmanship, and quality to last a thousand years".
The Swiss Engineers, intrigued by the challenge, go to work. Six months later, they present the Austrians with their timeless bridge in all its glory!
"Hahaha, you dumb Swiss, there's no water in the Sahara, we made you build a useless bridge", teased the Austrians with great fervour. "Now tear it down"
Reply the Swiss engineers: "We would, but there's a group of Austrians fishing off it".
A man asks the worker at the astronomy museum how old the universe is. He responds 13.7 billion and 7 years old.
The man is puzzled how the worker knew the age to such precision. The worker answered, When I got this job, the person who hired me told me that the universe is 13.7 billion years old, and I've worked here for seven years.
No one expects the Spanish Ink -precision
No one expects the Spanish ink precision.
It's a wonder they ever took off...
All attributes I have while shaving my pubes that I should really put into other aspects of my life.
No one ever expects the Spanish ink precision
Nobody expects the Spanish ink precision
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