Pounding Jokes

Funniest Pounding Short Jokes

Short pounding jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The pounding humour may include short hitting jokes also.

1. When I was growing up # was pound, not hashtag Good thing it changed, since "pound metoo" would've been sending the wrong message
2. Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight... There would be mass confusion.
3. A girl once told me, If you lost about 50 pounds you'd be cute I told her, if I lost 50 pounds I'd be talking to your friends!
4. Taylor Swift is dropping albums like I'm dropping pounds Only two, but still more than anyone expected.
5. A lot of people call # a Hashtag but back in my day it was the pound sign which makes the movement #MeToo a bit awkward
6. My neighbor pounded on my door at 2:30am last night! Can you believe that?! 2:30am! Fortunately, I was still up practicing my bagpipes.
7. My wife gained more than 100 pounds during pregnancy, so I started walking 5 miles every day to encourage her. It's been three months and now I'm over 300 miles away from home.
8. In New York City, a fisherman reeled in a 250 pound catfish 6 feet 6 inches long. I don't get what the big deal is. I do that on Tinder every day.
9. I started going to the gym a year ago and so far I lost 500 pounds! The only problem is I'm British...
10. I regret joining the gym recently.. leaving the EU would've been a more effective way to lose pounds

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Pounding One Liners

Which pounding one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with pounding? I can suggest the ones about nailing and pumping.

1. To the woman who keeps pounding on my door at night: I'm not letting you out.
2. What is great in the US but awful in the UK? Losing pounds
3. I set out to lose 10 pounds this month... Only 15 more to go
4. Why are rich british people fat? because they measure their wealth in pounds
5. How are dog catchers paid? By the pound!
6. I had a goal to lose 20 Pounds by the end of the year. 30 pounds to go
7. My favorite rapper is 50 cent Or as the British people now call him, 10,000 pounds.
8. I lost 40 pounds in a day; but I also lost my babysitting job.
9. If the camera really does add 10 pounds Do ethiopian kids even exist?
10. I lost fifty pounds... Unfortunately, I was in England at the time.
11. The David Cameron diet: You'll never lose your pounds quicker.
12. - Dad, can I borrow 10 pounds? - 15 pounds? Why do you need 20 pounds?
13. It's been a year that I started working out to lose 10 pounds... Only 12 more to go
14. I started 2016 with a goal to lose 20 pounds Only 30 more to go and I'm there!
15. What's the fastest way to lose a few pounds? Exit the european Union.

Comedy Pounding Jokes to Make Your Friends Giggle

What funny jokes about pounding you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean pound it hand jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make pounding pranks.