A stoner wants to learn about ice fishing. So he gathers all the needed equipment and makes his way to the closest frozen ice.
He goes about 20 feet out and drills a hole in the ice.
"There's no fish there!" Booms a voice.
The stoner shrugs and moves a further 50 feet out and drills another hole.
"There's no fish there either!" Yells the voice again.
The stoner looks around wildly and asks, "Is that you God?"
"No," says the voice, "I own the fucking ice rink!"
The Steelers must be in town.
How much for that TV set in the window?
The owner looks at the TV set, then looks at the stoner, and says, I don't sell stuff to potheads. So the stoner tells the owner that he'll quit smoking and will come back the next week to buy the TV. A week later, the stoner comes back and says, I quit smoking pot. Now, how much for that TV set in the window?
And the owner says, I told you I don't sell to potheads! So the stoner leaves again.
He comes back a week later and says, How much for that TV?
The owner says, I'm not going to tell you again, I don't sell to potheads!!!
The stoner looks back at the owner and says, How can you tell I'm a pothead?
The owner looks back and says, Because that's a microwave
HAPPY 4-20
A weed whacker.
If a crackhead overdoses you find them dead in the gutter, if pothead overdoses you find them asleep in the fridge.
He didnt have any joints.
Because a watched pothead never FOILS.
High
Homeless
Stop, drop, and roll
vapes
Stonedface killer.
Shredded Wheat
A deer walks up to the fence and jumps over it.
An antelope walks up to the fence and goes under it.
A French guy walks up to the fence and surrenders.
A German guy walks up to the fence and builds a bigger gun.
An Italian walks up to the fence and starts eating pasta.
A pothead walks up to the fence, sits on it and starts smoking weed.
An American walks up to the fence, shoots the pothead, tests how sturdy the fence is, and strips it up to put it on the Mexican border.
He's not a pothead, he's a mari-wanna be.
He's a high jacker.
Are propa-ganja.
The bartender says "Sorry, we don't serve the Pittsburgh Steelers offensive backfield here."
They smoke their best buds
420 raze it!
"Marriage.. you wanna?"
Four Liars and a Pothead walk into a bar...
And someone says, "Hey, look! It's the US Olympic Swimming Team!"
She's afraid of heights.
'Cause there's no grass.
He was stoned to death.
Coughin'
"Marriage....you wanna?"
Is realizing to get the food before smoking week rather than after
That makes it a baker's dozen.
Because all of his buds were so dense...
A body
5'8".
A Yellowstoner.
"I'm not a pothead, I'm a stoner-sapien." - Things you hear on the train
I heard they're calling him the feel good drag.
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