Pothead Jokes

What are some Pothead jokes?

A pothead, a rapist and a dog killer walk into a bar.

The Steelers must be in town.

A stoner walks into an appliance store and asks the owner

How much for that TV set in the window?
The owner looks at the TV set, then looks at the stoner, and says, I don't sell stuff to potheads. So the stoner tells the owner that he'll quit smoking and will come back the next week to buy the TV. A week later, the stoner comes back and says, I quit smoking pot. Now, how much for that TV set in the window?
And the owner says, I told you I don't sell to potheads! So the stoner leaves again.
He comes back a week later and says, How much for that TV?
The owner says, I'm not going to tell you again, I don't sell to potheads!!!
The stoner looks back at the owner and says, How can you tell I'm a pothead?
The owner looks back and says, Because that's a microwave

HAPPY 4-20

What do you call an abusive pothead?

A weed whacker.

what's the difference between a crack head and a pot head?

If a crackhead overdoses you find them dead in the gutter, if pothead overdoses you find them asleep in the fridge.

Why did the pothead have weak knees and elbows?

He didnt have any joints.

Why couldn't the stoner simplify his binomials in front of the class?

Because a watched pothead never FOILS.

How did one pothead greet the other?


What do you call a pothead that breaks up with his girlfriend?


Police Officer: "How high are you?"

Pothead: "No officer, it's "Hi, How are you?"

What do potheads do when they see a fire?

Stop, drop, and roll

What do you call a pothead that murders?

Stonedface killer.

There is a fence

A deer walks up to the fence and jumps over it.

An antelope walks up to the fence and goes under it.

A French guy walks up to the fence and surrenders.

A German guy walks up to the fence and builds a bigger gun.

An Italian walks up to the fence and starts eating pasta.

A pothead walks up to the fence, sits on it and starts smoking weed.

An American walks up to the fence, shoots the pothead, tests how sturdy the fence is, and strips it up to put it on the Mexican border.

What does a muscular pothead have for breakfast?

Shredded Wheat

I have a friend who says he's a pothead but only takes one hit and then he's stoned.

He's not a pothead, he's a mari-wanna be.

Why can't a a pothead who is addicted to masturbation board a flight?

He's a high jacker.

The only advertisement a pothead notices...

Are propa-ganja.

Why don't potheads have close friends?

They smoke their best buds

Cheesy Late out-of-context Joke of the Day

Four Liars and a Pothead walk into a bar...

And someone says, "Hey, look! It's the US Olympic Swimming Team!"

How did the pothead propose to his girlfriend?

"Marriage.. you wanna?"

What do pothead barbarians say when 420 rolls around?

420 raze it!

How to make Pothead jokes?

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