The Best 54 Posit Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Posit jokes. There are some posit ugly jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these posit football puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Posit Jokes and Puns

It's all in the position.

A father and son were standing in the front yard one day and the son notices two dogs having sex. He asks "dad what they are doing?" The father replies "they are making puppies." A few nights later the son walks in on his mother and father having sex and asks " dad what are y'all doing?" The father says "we're making babies." The son quickly replies " well turn her over, I want a puppy!"

What's the most positive thing in Harlem?


Not really sure about my position on illegal immigration into the US. As a Latino,

I'd say I'm on the fence.

Posit joke, Not really sure about my position on illegal immigration into the US. As a Latino,

What position does Thor like to play as in a game of basketball?


What is the most positive thing in a ghetto?



James finds a friend whom he hasn't spoken with for a long time, so to be nice, he breaks the ice:

" -Hey Oscar, how are you doing?"

" -Terrible."

" -What?! What about your Ferrari?"

" -Wrecked in an accident... and the insurance had just expired."

" -Well, you win some, you lose some... And what about your son, the intelectual one?"

" -He was the one driving the Ferrari. Died upon impact."

" -But what about your beautiful daughter, didn't she say she wanted to be a model or something?"

" -She did, yeah... And was with her brother. She died too. Only person who wasn't in the car was my wife."

" -Oh thank God! How is she?"

" -She ran off with my bussiness partner."

" -Well, at least you got the company."

" -Yeah, a bankrupt one... I owe millions."

" -Jesus, dude! Do you have anything positive in your life?"

" -Yeah, HIV."

I have tried to be positive my whole life.

And now I have HIV.

Posit joke, I have tried to be positive my whole life.

A positive parent..

A positive parent said to their negative child... Your grounded.

"What position do you play?"

"Left bench."

I'm positive I lost an electron...

...better keep an ion that.

What's the most positive thing about Africa?


You can explore posit shit reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean posit suggest dad jokes. There are also posit puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

How do you get to a position of power in a science lab?

Work over time

One positive of Arnold Palmer's passing...

He's six under for the first time in years...

I only have one positive trait...


Think about something positive! What's the first thing that comes to your mind?

My HIV test.

I think we all need something positive after the recent election

Which is why I'm sharing my HIV status with all of you.

Posit joke, I think we all need something positive after the recent election

There's one positive thing for Mexico now

The ladder sales went through the roof.

I consider myself a positive person

HIV positive that is

What's the only positive from living in the ghetto?

Pregnancy tests

What did the positive terminal say to the negative terminal?

Let's try not getting too attached

I'm positive that Apple is going to do a red iphone

I'm HIV positive.

Well, there's a least one positive thing about moving to San Francisco...

Your partner.

Something positive in my life that happened recently? Last week I got laid

off from work. I guess it's not that positive.

A positive ion stole an electron yesterday.

He got away with no charge.

What is positive about beeing blonde?

You are allowed to park your car in the disabled spot

(Dont know if it have been done before, no energy to scroll through the endless thread)

I like to be positive

Even though I'm unemployed and recently got evicted, I could still destroy Stephen Hawking in a 100m dash.

69 is known as smoker's position......

Girl smoke the cigar and guy cleans the ashtray.

I always look to the positives in life.

For example, sure I may have been rejected from the girl of my dreams, but at least I'm another day closer to my death.

What's the positive thing about being a blonde?

You can't get a brain tumor.

You should always be positive

Unless, of course, you're getting tested for an STD

The only positive thing about the Jesse Lacey accusations?

We'll get a good Taking Back Sunday album out of it.

I'm quite positive about my laboratory results.

HIV positive.

What is one positive thing that's actually really negative?

A pregnancy test

There's a new position in the "KAMASUTRA" called "MODI".

It's when a man gets on TOP and does NOTHING.

Positive thinking in disguise

Optimist Prime

There is one positive thing about a group of horses going to the glue factory...

they'll really stick together.

What positive quality about someone also tells you something negative about them?

Their HIV test

The only positive thing about my life is...

my HIV test.

"Say something positive about gay men"

"Not only do they leave more girls for us, they take another dude with them"

What's the only positive about living in the hood?


I once had a position where everyday my palms were greased

And I made a lot of dough, only to see it all frittered away; Life wasn't easy as a pastry chef.

What position to hit it from?


What's a more positive way of describing incest? NSFW

A family reunion.

I'm positive I lost an electron bumping into that anode.

Isn't that ionic?

I am a positive person...

When someone is negative to me, I become negative to him as well to make the whole situation positive

The positive thing about being suicidal

Is that at least you're given a phone number

What position on the sports team does the benched player play?

Left... out.

So I saw everybody using the 69 position

Well me and my girlfriend use the 96 position

How to get a position in the Trump Administration

Trump: How much is 2 + 2?

You: How much do you want it to be?

Trump: That's the kind of winning attitude I demand, welcome to my team!

You're so positive!!!

A message from Corona

Alzheimer's has a positive side too

Every day you get to meet new people.

The position of 69 should be replaced by 96.

With the economy as it is, the cost of eating out has gone up.

Positive Corona cases are way down in Texas over the last few days...

It requires power to perform the test.

What did the positive charge say to the negative charge after their first date?

*"We have potential."*

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the posit knew jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working posit week piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes