Pooping Jokes

63 pooping jokes and hilarious pooping puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about pooping that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Everyone loves a good laugh, and you'll be in stitches with these funny poop jokes. From pooping pants to jokes about dogs, babies, and more, get ready to plop down and read on for some of the funniest pooping jokes around.

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Best Short Pooping Jokes

Short pooping puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The pooping humour may include short taking a dump jokes also.

  1. The creator of Mad Libs died this week. His friends described him as a warm and pulpy man who loved his wife and pelicans. He will be deeply pooped.
  2. A cowboy ran out of food on the trail so he had to boil and eat his leather chaps. The next day he pooped his pants.
  3. I bought a chicken to make sandwiches... Turns out it doesn't, it just make a lot of noise and poops on the floor.
  4. Last night I slept like a baby. I woke up screaming every 3 hours because I was hungry and had pooped myself.
  5. Did you hear about the runner who pooped his pants during a race? He didn't win, but he did finish number two.
  6. Guy goes to the doctor and says he poops every morning at 8 The doctor asks so, what is the problem , and the guy says I wake up at 9
  7. What do they announce overhead when a patient poops in the bed in the hospital? I Heard they call a Code Amber.
  8. When I was in college my roommate accused me of stealing his clothes I was so worried I nearly pooped his pants
  9. What do you call a notebook where you record information about your poops? Some people may call it a log journal, while others call it a diary-a.
  10. Honey, I have good news and bad news. The bad news is that the penguin pooped in the bathtub. Wife: "But we don't *have* a penguin!"
    Me: "And now for the good news...!"
Pooping joke, Honey, I have good news and bad news. The bad news is that the penguin pooped in the bathtub.

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about pooping can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of pooping puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

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Pooping One Liners

Which pooping one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with pooping? I can suggest the ones about peeing and urinating.

  1. Just pooped my pants. Which is weird, because I don't even remember eating them.
  2. Did you hear about the guy who ate his trousers? He pooped his pants!
  3. What is it called when a hacker poops? Logging out
  4. How does baby Yoda pooped when he was constipated?
    He forces it out.
  5. I slept like a baby last night I pooped myself and woke up crying.
  6. I fell off my chair at the bar and pooped my pants I guess I had a loose stool.
  7. What are teddy bear poops called? Fleeces
  8. What did the Japanese girl do after she pooped her pants? Charged double for them.
  9. I slept like a baby last night. I pooped my pants and cried myself to sleep.
  10. What do you do when your kitten poops? Catch it.
  11. I had a dreamed I pooped the bed. So it turns out dreams can come true!
  12. What is it called when an officer poops his pants while chasing a perp? Active doody.
  13. Hey Vegetarians My food poops on yours.
  14. What do you call some who's too pooped to Pope? Ex-Benedict
  15. What's it called when a Polliwog poops? Toadstool.

Dog Pooping Jokes

Here is a list of funny dog pooping jokes and even better dog pooping puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • The thing I don't like about Dietary Fiber is the large poops I'm also not crazy about our dog's name.
  • Why did Kanye name his dog P Diddy? So he can scoop Diddy's poops
  • I'm terrible with animals. I had a dog once. The first time I left him alone, he chewed up all my furniture, pooped everywhere, and death.
  • My 9 year old thinks we should name our new dog after her Uncle. When we asked her why, "So when we tell people that Steve pooped in the garage, they'll think it was him!".

    True story.
  • When I get a dog So, when I get a dog, I'll call it Ammay. Everytime it poops, I'll get the Ammay fieces!
  • My dog and I are so alike He poops and he is happy
  • A man walks into a pub holding a dog p**... in his hands He says to his friend "eww, look what I nearly stepped in"
  • When a dog is in a p**... position, she's vulnerable, and she's looking to the owner to protect her. When I do the same to my dog I get banned from the dog park
  • My friend works at a rubber dog-p**... factory. He'll never get rich, but he makes doo.
  • My new dog is a p**... machine. I tallied each pile as I cleaned up the yard. I stopped counting at 288, because that's two g**....

Pooping Pants Jokes

Here is a list of funny pooping pants jokes and even better pooping pants puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I literally just pooped my pants... I figuratively cleaned my poopy pants.
  • I tried to explain to my 4-year-old son that it's perfectly normal to accidentally p**... your pants, but he's still making fun of me.
  • What's worse than p**... your pants? ...someone else p**... in your pants.

Baby Pooping Jokes

Here is a list of funny baby pooping jokes and even better baby pooping puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • The Wife wants to have a baby but the Husband tries to discourage her. H: A baby sleeps and it poops and it cries when it's hungry.
    W: You two should get along famously.
  • Wife calls her mother in-law and asks her "If your baby puked and pooped, who should it clean it up?" Mother in-law yells "the mother!" Wife - "Then come clean up your drunk son!"
  • I have become a master at cleaning my baby after a p**.... I'm a #2 dad.
  • I often sleep like a baby that is, not very much with various fits of crying and p**....
  • Walked into my baby son's nursery only to see my wife standing in p**... with it smeared all over the walls and furniture asking, Who did this?! I said it was not apparent.
  • I sleep like a baby at night, rarely and with short bursts of crying and p**..., sometimes both
Pooping joke, I sleep like a baby at night,

Uplifting Pooping Jokes to have Hilarious Fun with Friends

What funny jokes about pooping you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean passing gas jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make pooping prank.

At birth, success is being alive. At age 3, success is not p**... your pants. At age 10, success is having friends. At age 16, success is having a driver's license. At age 20, success is having s**.... At age 30, success is having money...

At age 40, success is having money.
At age 55, success is having s**....
At age 70, success is having a driver's license.
At age 75, success is having friends.
At age 80, success is not p**... your pants.
At age 100, success is being alive.

p**... is kinda like being in a relationship...

It's amazing at first but when it's over you feel empty inside.

I told my wife that I find out every morning how much my p**... weighs.

She asked if I weighed myself before and after p**.... I thought for a second and I told her that her way is a lot cleaner than what I have been doing.

My doctor asked for a stool sample....

...and got mad at me when I handed him a tiny chair. Now I'm banned from the doctors office and still don't know why I'm p**... out furniture.

I was walking through a graveyard this morning and saw a man squatting by a tombstone.

I shouted "Morning!"
He replied "No, just p**...."

Little Red Riding Hood walks alone through the dark forest.

Suddenly she hears a rustling behind a thick bush.
She pushes the branches and bushes aside and suddenly the big bad wolf is sitting in front of her.
"Oh, bad wolf. Why do you have such big red eyes?"
"Get out of here. I'm p**...!"

p**... is a lot like math.

When it's hard, sometimes you have to work it out with a pencil and paper.

Doctor, I've got a problem

Doc: What is that?
Gramps: I don't know why, but I keep p**... everyday at 8 am sharp.
Doc: How is that a problem?
Gramps: I wake up at 9am.

An Indian Chief is sitting under a tree...

An Indian Chief and his son are sitting under a tree, looking out over the plains when his son asks: "Father, why is sister named, Running Deer?"
Chief: "Because, my son, when she was being born I looked out of the teepee and saw a deer running."
Son: "Father, why is brother called Charging Bull?"
Chief: "Because my son, when he was being born I looked out of the teepee and saw a bull running. Why do you ask, p**... Dog?

I wouldn't say p**... is my favorite activity.....

But it's a solid number two.

The lights went out in Men's room while I was p**....

I couldn't see s**....

What's the difference between a project manager and a person who poops?

The person p**... gets s**... done.

How are p**... at someone else's house, and a first date the same?

You really hope both *go down*.

p**... is depressing...

You just sit there til you feel empty inside...

What do computers and p**... have in common?

They both end when you logout.

I saw a squirrel p**... the other day.

s**...'s Nuts...

As new parents my wife and I had to deal with the first p**... in the bath.

My daughter thought it was hilarious. I thought it was hilarious. My wife thinks I'm too old to be p**... in the bath.

What makes p**... in someone's yard not passive aggressive?

Eye contact.

I keep a bat in my bedroom for protection.

I feel safe but it keeps p**... in my ear.

A boy walks up to a pirate

A boy walks up to a pirate and curious about his missing leg, arm, and eye, asks about them.
"Why are your arm and leg missing?" the boy asks.
"Well, I was attacked by a gator while burying me treasure. Now I got me a wooden peg and hook for me hand"
"Then what happened to your eye?"
"s**... seagull pooped in it."

"A bird p**... in your eye made it fall right out?" The boy asks, surprised.
"No, lad. That was the first day I had my hook!"

A bear and a rabbit are p**... in the woods.

The bear glances over at the rabbit and asks "Do you have trouble with poo sticking to your fur?"
The rabbit replies, "Nope, never been a problem. Just lucky that way, I guess."
"Guess so," the bear said, as he picked up the rabbit and wiped his butt with him.

Pigeon problem

Visited a friend on the eighth floor of her old government office building in Washington. There were hundreds of pigeons sitting on the ledge along the building outside the windows, making noise and p**..., two inches deep in some places. They were really annoying. I asked her if they'd tried getting rid of them. She said, "See those wires along the ledge? They are carrying 1000 volts. We thought that would get rid of them, but it didn't phase them a bit." I told her "I'm not surprised. That's AC current, and these are DC pigeons."

I like p**...

but it takes a lot out of me.

I like to think of the act of p**... like a game of poker

You go all in with a royal flush.

What is simultaneously the best and sh*ttiest way to start your day?


My dog ate a package of peanut butter cups.

Now he's p**... out Reeses f**....

p**... is just like Game of Thrones.

You either win or you die.

Pooping joke, p**... is just like Game of Thrones.

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these pooping jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.