Pools Jokes

Funniest Pools Short Jokes

Short pools jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The pools humour may include short swimming pool jokes also.

1. How do you get 100 drunk and rowdy Canadians out of a pool? You say "Please get out of the pool."
2. How do you get 30 Canadians out of a pool? You say, O.K., everybody, it's time to get out of the pool!
3. What's green, fuzzy, has four legs and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table.
4. How do you get 100 Canadians out of a swimming pool in a hurry? Say: "Would everyone please get out of the swimming pool."
5. Personally, i think that Tide pods are even better than advertised. I mean, anything that can clean your clothes and the gene pool in the same product...
6. Everyone pees in the pool... But you do it once from the high dive and you're some sort of monster.
7. How do you get 50 Canadians out of the swimming pool? Say, " Everyone out of the pool please."
8. The evolution of tide pods In 2017 tids pods cleaned clothes but in 2018 it cleans the gene pool
9. "Sir, you'll need to leave, you can't pee in the pool." "But everyone pees in the pool!"
   "Yes, but not from the diving board."
10. So I broke my waterproof speaker, by throwing it into a pool. I filed a request for a new speaker, but the company responded "it's not our fault the pool was empty".

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Pools One Liners

Which pools one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with pools? I can suggest the ones about playing pool and swims.

1. How do you get 30 drunk Canadians out of the pool? "Please Get Out The Pool"
2. The lifeguard yelled at me for peeing in the pool. I was so startled, I almost fell in.
3. What's green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table
4. Got caught peeing in the pool The lifeguard shouted at me so loud, I nearly fell in.
5. Yo momma is so fat ... She took a jump in the pool, they found water on Mars.
6. What do you do if an epileptic has a seizure in your pool? Throw in your laundry.
7. I once got yelled at for peeing in a pool Scared me so much I almost fell in.
8. What is big green and fuzzy and kills you when it falls out of a tree? A pool table
9. What game do Anti-Vaxxer's kids play in the pool? Marco Polio
10. Tide announced the new motto for their pods line. Cleaning the gene pool since 2017.
11. Anyone wanna hang out, grab a drink or shoot some pool? Asking for a friend
12. What do anti-vaxx children play in the pool? Marco-Polio
13. I used to be a lifeguard at a public pool.... Until this blue kid got me fired.
14. I got caught peeing in a pool today. The lifeguard yelled so loud, I almost fell in!
15. What did Mr. T say after throwing five $10 bills off the diving board? I fitty da pool!

Birthing Pools Jokes

Here is a list of funny birthing pools jokes and even better birthing pools puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• What's the term for when the pool breaks during water birth? A midwife crisis.
• A woman waited to find out the s**... of her baby... After giving birth in a birthing pool, the baby floated to the surface with no arms or legs.
  It's a buoy!

Share Hilarious Pools Jokes and Enjoy Unforgettable Laughter

What funny jokes about pools you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean pool table jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make pools pranks.