Pool Table Jokes
52 pool table jokes and hilarious pool table puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about pool table that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Pool Table Short Jokes
Short pool table jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The pool table humour may include short pool jokes also.
- What's green, fuzzy, has four legs and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table.
- What's big, green, fuzzy, has four legs, and if it fell from a tree it would kill you? A pool table.
- Why do elephants wear green shoes? So they can sneak across pool tables.
Have you ever seen an elephant sneaking across a pool table?
Works, doesn't it? - Q: What's green, has six legs, and if it drops out of a tree onto you will kill you? A: A pool table.
Bonus Joke!!!
Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Doesn't matter, he won't come. - What's green and fuzzy What's green, fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree.
A Pool Table - Q: What is green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you?
A: A pool table. - What's big and green, brown and fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree, it would certainly kill you? A pool table... (A billiards table)
- What's the difference between a pool table and a room full of dead prostitutes? I don't have a pool table in my basement.
- I must be really drunk because I swear I just heard a bar stool ask the pool table if it wanted a fight. My money's on the pool table.
- I had to disassemble my billiards table It became a pool apart
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Pool Table One Liners
Which pool table one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with pool table? I can suggest the ones about snooker table and swimming pool.
- What's green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table
- What is big green and fuzzy and kills you when it falls out of a tree? A pool table
- Yo momma is so dumb That she tried to drown herself on a pool table
- What is green and it hurts very much if it falls on your head? A pool table.
- What's green, has 4 legs, and if it fell out of a tree would kill you? A pool table.
- What's green got 6 legs and if it falls out of a tree it'll kill you ? A pool table
- What is green fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree would kill you? A pool table.!!
- What is green, fuzzy and very deadly if it falls on you out of a tree? A pool table.
- What's green, has 4 legs and will kill you by jumping from a tree? Pool Table
- What is green, has four sides and hurts if it hits your head? A pool table
- I like my women like I like my pool tables... Fast, loose, and three feet tall.
- The Daredevil walks into a bar ...And the pool table ,
and the chair,
and the counter. - What do you call an Irishman with no arms and no legs on a pool table? Rick O'Shay
- What's green and brown and if it falls from a tree onto you you're dead? A pool table.
- I hurt myself last summer diving into a pool.. table.
Pool Table Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about pool table you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean playing pool jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make pool table pranks.
Hello?
- "Hello?"
- "Hi honey. This is Daddy. Is Mommy near the phone?"
- "No Daddy. She´s upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Paul."
After a brief pause, Daddy says,
- "But honey, you haven´t got an Uncle Paul."
- "Oh yes I do, and he´s upstairs in the bedroom with Mommy, right now."
Brief Pause.
- "Uh, okay then, this is what I want you to do. Put the phone down on the table, run upstairs and knock on the bedroom door and shout to Mommy that Daddy´s car just pulled into the driveway."
- "Okay Daddy, just a minute."
A few minutes later the little girl comes back to the phone.
- "I did it Daddy."
- "And what happened honey?" he asked.
- "Well, Mommy got all scared, jumped out of bed with no clothes on and ran around screaming. Then she tripped over the rug, hit her head on the dresser and now she isn´t moving at all!"
- "Oh my God!!! What about your Uncle Paul?"
- "He jumped out of the bed with no clothes on, too. He was all scared and he jumped out of the back window and into the swimming pool. But I guess he didn´t know that you took out the water last week to clean it. He hit the bottom of the pool and I think he´s dead."
***Loooong Pause***
Then Daddy says,
- "What swimming pool? . . . Is this 486-5731"?
My mom really only sends the classiest of FWDs
A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at him.
She says hello. He's rather taken a back because he can't place where he knows her.
So he says, "Do you know me?"
To which she replies, "I think you're the father of one of my kids."
Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife, and he says,
"Oh, are you the stripper from my bachelor party that I did on the pool table with all my buddies
watching while your partner whipped me with wet celery?"
The woman looks sternly into his eyes and says very calmly, "No, I'm your son's teacher."
A man phones the house and the maid picks up the
phone.
A man phones the house and the maid picks up the phone. He asks the maid where the wife is. She says the wife is in the bed with a man. After a long pause, the man gathers himself together asks the maid to do a favor for him and promises her $50,000. He asks her to go to his study room and to get a gun from the cabinet table and to shoot both the woman and the man. The maid puts down the phone receiver and the man can hear two gunshots.
The maid cames back panting and stressed and picks up the phone again and says now what. The man says to the maid to dump the bodies in their pool.
The maid pauses a little and says "But you don't have a pool". There is a pause on the other line. "Oh sorry, wrong number."
What's green, fuzzy , has 4 legs and can sometimes be found hanging in trees?
A pool table
Why did Ayn Rand lose the pool tournament?
She wouldn't play on a regulation size table
A Blind Man walks into an all women's bar
He sits down and orders a shot. After the shot he asks, "Does anybody want to hear a blonde joke?"
The lady next to him leans over. She says, "Hey buddy, so I'm gonna tell you this because it seems like you don't know any better. I'm a blonde coal miner, that woman over at the bar is a blonde professional boxer, the bartender is a blonde cage fighter, that woman at the pool table is a blonde steel mill worker, and shes a blonde bouncer. So buddy, are you sure you still want to tell that blonde joke?"
To which the blind man responds, "Well no, not if I've got to explain it five times."
A blind cowboy walks into a bar...
...and after ordering his drink, asks the bartender if he'd like to hear a blonde joke. The bartender replies, "Well, I don't mind sir, but I must warn you that there are three rather dangerous blondes in this bar tonight.
The first one over by the pool table just got released from prison for 2nd degree m**.... The second in the corner there is the leader of the local gang. And the last one sitting just next to you is a professional boxer.
So I must ask, are you really sure you want to tell this blonde joke?"
The blind cowboy thinks for a moment, shakes his head, and says, "Nah, I don't wanna have to explain it three times."
Guy tells a bartender, I'll bet you 100 bucks ...
Guy tells a bartender, I'll bet you 100 bucks I can pee in this cup from five feet away without missing a drop. The bartender takes the bet.
The man misses horribly, hitting pretty much everything except the cup.
The bartender laughs and the man pays him the money.
Then the bartender sees the man's friends laughing by the pool table, and he asks the man what is so funny.
The man says, I bet them 1,000 bucks I would pee all over your bar and you wouldn't try to stop me.
How do you make a pool table laugh?
Tickle it's b**...
A man was at the grocery store
when he suddenly notices an attractive woman waving at him.
She smiles and says hello.
The man is puzzled and can't recall where he knows her from.
He says, "Do you know me?"
The woman replies, "You're the father of one of my kids."
The man's mind is racing and he goes back to the only time he was unfaithful to his wife.
He says, "My God, are you the stripper from my bachelor party that I made love to on the pool table with all my buddies watching while your partner whipped my b**... with a wet cucumber?"
She pauses and says calmly, "No, I'm your son's elementary teacher."
How do you make a pool table laugh?
Tickle it's b**.... :)
Il let myself out....
Misunderstanding.
A man in the supermarket sees a woman across the aisle looking at him, so he goes over and says "do i know you"? She says "you're the father of one of my children". He panics and thinks about the only time he cheated on his wife. "Are you the stripper at that party who had s**... with me on the pool table while everyone stood around cheering". "No", she says, looking horrified "i'm your sons teacher".