Poodle Jokes
47 poodle jokes and hilarious poodle puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about poodle that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Check out this hilarious collection of poodle jokes and memes! From toy poodles to rhinoceros-sized pooches, these silly jokes about poodles will make you and your pup Elifino laugh.
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Funniest Poodle Short Jokes
Short poodle jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The poodle humour may include short hound dog jokes also.
- Can I sell kayak equipment if my dog peed on it? Can I peddle a paddle if it's in a puddle of poodle piddle?
- The man who cross breeds labradors and poodles will be adequate for the job at hand. The labradoodle dude'll do.
- Apparently, the FDA is okay with lab-grown meat Poodle-grown meat, however, is still off the menu.
- What do you get when you cross a dachshund, a Schnauzer, a Shih Tzu, and a Poodle? A Wienerschnitzel.
- Ruined a brand new pair of shoes. It's raining cats and dogs out and I stepped in a poodle.
- A man got home from his walk and his wife said: Thank god you got home safe it's raining cats and dogs!!! The man: It's not raining that bad I didn't even step in any poodles
- what do you get if you cross a poodle with a pit bull? not much of a watchdog, but it's a vicious gossip.
- Why are poodles suspicious of strangers? Because they're afraid of running into a poodaphile.
- A good groaner What do you get when you combine an elephant and a poodle?
A dead poodle, split in half. - What do you get if you cross a cocker-spaniel with a poodle and a rooster? A Cockerpoodledoo!
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Poodle One Liners
Which poodle one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with poodle? I can suggest the ones about puppy and sheepdog.
- It's raining cats and dogs outside. Know how I can tell? I stepped in a poodle.
- How do you know it's raining cats and dogs? When you walk outside and step in a poodle.
- Why must you be careful when it's raining cats and dogs? You might step in a poodle.
- What happens when it's raining cats and dogs? You have to look out for poodles.
- Man it was really raining cats and dogs today. Sure hope I don't step in a poodle.
- What do you get when you mate an elephant with a poodle? A poodle split in half.
- China have announced their new rage of meat free snacks. "Not Poodle"
- What do you get when you hit a poodle with a bulldozer? A puddle
- How do you know when it is raining cats and dogs? There are poodles everywhere!
- What do you get if you melt a shitzhu? A poodle
- what do you get if you mix a dachsund with a cocker spaniel/ poodle mix? A cockadockapoo.
- What do you call a poodle with no legs?
A sponge. - Q: How did the blonde kill her toy poodle?
A: Trying to put batteries in it. - Where did the widowed poodle go to vacation? Barkelona
- What's the most popular soup in China? Chicken poodle soup...I know, I know booooo
Poodle Dog Jokes
Here is a list of funny poodle dog jokes and even better poodle dog puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- My wife and I recently adopted 2 children from china and I came home today to find them trying to cook my poodle. Immediately I repeated what I said this morning.
"No kids! I said WALK the dog!" - Labradoodles were made when Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a Labrador and a Poodle at the same time.
- What's the s**... dog race? The p**...-dle!
I'll be seeing myself out :/ - What's the smelliest breed of dog? A p**...-dle
Toy Poodle Jokes
Here is a list of funny toy poodle jokes and even better toy poodle puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What do you call a poodle puppy? A baby toy.
Uproarious Poodle Jokes to Have a Laugh Out Loud Good Time
What funny jokes about poodle you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean doggy jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make poodle pranks.
A husky, a pitbull, and a chihuahua are all fighting over a poodle.
Poodle says: "I'll only choose the mate who can use the words 'Liver' and 'Cheese' in one sentence..."
Husky: "Well that's easy, I love liver and I love cheese!"
Poodle: "That's not gonna work"
Pitbull: "I hate liver and I hate cheese!"
Poodle: "...No"
chihuahua: "LIVER ALONE, CHEESE MINE!"
Two dogs are at the vet talking.
Two dogs are at the vet talking.
Great Dane: So what are you here for?
Poodle: Well I've been wandering around the neighborhood too much lately looking for s**... so they're having me castrated, you?
Great Dane: My mistress does the housework n**..., she was bending over cleaning the vegetable draw in the fridge and I just couldn't help myself so I went for it.
Poodle: So you're here for castration too hey?
Great Dane: No, I'm here to get my claws trimmed.
A Golden Retriever mixed with a Poodle is called a Golden Doodle.
Aren't you glad they didn't call it a p**... Retriever?
A p**... drunk man stumbles onto the bus on his way home...
When he finally hobbles his way to the last empty seat, he turns to see a posh stiff lady seated with her frilly pink French poodle.
He turns his head shakily and slurs, "Where'dh ye get tha' pig?"
The lady huffs and retorts, "Ugh! Why, I'll have you know Mr. Squiggles is **not** a pig! He is a purebred French poodle!"
The man squints his eyes and is silent for a second. Then turns back to the lady and slurs once more:
"I wath tokking...to thuh Frensh poothle."
I haven't seen my wife in 2 days
I came home from work the other day and said, "It's raining cats and dogs out there!"
My wife asked, "Why do you say that?"
I said, "Because I just stepped into a poodle."
The swelling in my eyes has gone down enough that I think I'll be able to see her tonight.
two dogs at the vet
A great dane and a poodle are in nearby kennels at a vet's office.
Poodle: "I get overly excited and pee on the floor when my owner comes home. His evil wife is having me put to sleep. What are you in for?"
Dane: "That's too bad. I got way too excited when my owner started doing Bikram yoga. I couldn't help it...I started h**... her like crazy."
Poodle: "So is she putting you down too?"
Dane: "Naw, I'm just getting my nails done."
Hilarious Joke
A poodle and a collie are walking together when the poodle suddenly unloads on his friend. My life is a mess, he says. My owner is mean, my girlfriend ran away with a schnauzer, and I'm as jittery as a cat.
Why don't you go see a psychiatrist? suggests the collie.
I can't, says the poodle. I'm not allowed on the couch.
What's the difference between a poodle h**... your leg and a pit bull h**... your leg?
You let the pit bull finish.
A poodle and a collie are walking together
A poodle and a collie are walking together when the poodle suddenly unloads on his friend. My life is a mess, he says. My owner is mean, my girlfriend ran away with a schnauzer, and I'm as jittery as a cat.
Why don't you go see a psychiatrist? suggests the collie.
I can't, says the poodle. I'm not allowed on the couch.
Poodle: My life is a mess. My owner is mean, my girlfriend is leaving me for a German shepherd, and I'm as nervous as a cat. Collie: Why don't you go see a psychiatrist?
Poodle: I can't. I'm not allowed on the couch.
What do you get when you come across a Rooster, a poodle, and a ghost?
c**...-a-Poodle-Boo!!!
