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Polls Jokes

40 polls jokes and hilarious polls puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about polls that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Jokes about exit polls, the Democratic nomination race, and immigrants, what could be a funnier combination? Read on to find out who the funniest candidate is in this humorous take on the election season.

Best Short Polls Jokes

Short polls jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The polls humour may include short votes jokes also.

  1. Poll: Have You Ever Watched Malcom in the Middle? [YES]
    [NO]
    [MAYBE, I DON'T KNOW]
    [CAN YOU REPEAT THE QUESTION?]
  2. Whats the difference between the government and a stripper? Strippers don't rig their polls.
  3. CNN Poll: 50% of Bernie Sanders supporters drink whole milk, 35% drink 2% milk, and 15% drink skim milk They all hate the 1% though
  4. I created a poll to see if people preferred pillows stuffed with bird feathers or pillows stuffed with synthetic material. Synthetic material didn't win. Too many down votes.
  5. Donald Trump is so far behind in the polls... ....it reminds me of the night he won the Presidency.
  6. They polled Britons on their favorite Jane Austen novel 52% prefer Pride & Prejudice to Sense & Sensibility
  7. Why does Warsaw get nervous during its neighbor's election season? Because of Germans rushing to the polls!
  8. What do strippers and presidential candidates have in common? They both go up and down polls
  9. According to a recent poll 9 out of 10 people have never had Steak Tartare. Apparently it's very rare.
  10. Once, China organized a poll to find out which clothing item was the most popular. Everyone thought it would be shirt. But taiwan.

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Polls joke, Once, China organized a poll to find out which clothing item was the most popular. Everyone thought


Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about polls can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of polls puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

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Polls One Liners

Which polls one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with polls? I can suggest the ones about survey and votes counted.

  1. I recently took a poll and found out 100% of campers were angry when their tent collapsed
  2. Where do polar bears vote? The North Poll.
  3. What's the most attention grabbing way to advertise a political candidate? Poll dancing
  4. How did the stripper know she was the most popular dancer at the club? She took a poll.
  5. My wife told me she is a poll worker. I'm just surprised they pay her in all singles.
  6. 76% of horses prefer running to walking ... According to a recent gallop poll.
  7. What do strippers and Hillary Clinton have in common? They rely too much on polls
  8. I took a poll recently and 100% of people were annoyed with their tent falling down.
  9. I'm doing a poll: Horses.
    Yay, or....?
  10. Why are strippers such good politicians? 'Cause they're good on the polls.
  11. I got a voting booth to decorate my house today it really polls the room together
  12. Are the Polish for or against abductions? Maybe I should take a poll
  13. What's a politicians favorite kind of dance move? Poll dancing!
  14. In a recent poll, 80% of Japanese women admitted to having faked origami.
  15. With the current outlook on UK exit polls... It looks like june is the end of May

Polls joke, With the current outlook on UK exit polls...

Gather Around for Heartwarming Polls Jokes and Uplifting Humor

What funny jokes about polls you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean recent survey jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make polls prank.

I'm planning on starting a s**... club....

... in Poland. It will be called Pole Land.
I will hire people from ex law enforcement as strippers.
The slogan for the club will be: "Welcome to Pole Land, in Poland: Where Polish police polish your pole".
The slogan did pretty well in market research polls.

Honestly, I'm just amazed he managed to pull it off.

When he first ran for president, nobody thought he could do it. When he started gaining in the polls, we all "knew" how it would end. But he showed us we were all wrong.
Congratulations to Barack Obama going eight years without being shot.

What's the difference between a scientist and a magician?

One pulls rabbits out of hats and the other polls habits out of rats

They say Trump isn't appealing to minorities...

...but according to the latest polls, he's winning 100% of the Naive American vote

Donald trump

The last American president was black, polls suggest that the next president will be Donald trump.....
Huh. I guess orange is the new black

Bill Clinton was surprised to find his old sandwich maker

is ahead 12 points in the polls.

I went to HomeDepot to get polls for making a clothesline and they said they don't carry them in stock anymore.

They said they only carry them on-line.

I told my mom I was going to go work the polls.

She replied, "don't forget to wipe it down before you start your set."

Why doesn't Nigel Farage like election forecasts?

He dislikes ~~poles~~ polls
How do you type jokes that rely on similar sounding words? It hard :(

America is in a steep decline. Recent polls show 84% of Americans have used w**...

I usually dump out the pipe after i use it.

I just found the best joke ever...

All the polls that predicted Hillary winning by double digits.

CNN is like a s**... club...

They keep dancing around all the polls.

On the fifth day to election, the public gave to me...

Five Gallup polls
Four awful choices
Three Trump Steaks
Two more WikiLeaks
And a cache of Clinton emails!

What's the difference between a Bernie Sanders supporter and a fat stripper?

A fat stripper actually gets to the polls.

There is a Polish supermarket around the corner from my house.

I tried to go there after the last election, but the polls were closed.

After scoring shockingly low in coffee preference polls, Dunkin Donuts changed its slogan:

America sleeps on Dunkin

If driving a disabled friend to the polls in order to jump the line is wrong, I don't want to be right.

And if leaving her there after I found out who she was voting for is wrong, then wrong be I.

Polls joke, If driving a disabled friend to the polls in order to jump the line is wrong, I don't want to be rig

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these polls jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.