Politically Correct Jokes
115 politically correct jokes and hilarious politically correct puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about politically correct that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Politically Correct Short Jokes
Short politically correct jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The politically correct humour may include short politically incorrect jokes also.
- I hate how politically correct the world is these days, you can't even say black paint You have to say
Leroy, please paint that wall - Someone called me racist for saying "black paint" Apparently the politically correct term is "Tyrone, please paint the fence".
- The world is so politically correct these days. You used to be able to say "black paint." Now it has to be "Jamal can you please paint my wall?"
- I hate all the political correctness these days, I can't even say "black paint" anymore. Now I have to say "Tyrone please paint the fence."
- The world is becoming too politically correct You can't even say black paint anymore, instead you have to say "Lamar can you please paint the fence".
- It may not be "politically correct" to say this... ...but there are over one million U.S Senators.
- These days you can't even say "blackboard" anymore. The politically correct term is: "Jamal, get on my ship."
- Everything has to be politically correct nowadays.. Back in the day you could say black paint, nowadays you have to say 'Jerome, please paint the fence.'
- Political correctness has reached the level of absurdity For example, we can't say brown paint. Instead we should say "please paint that wall, Jose"
- Why is the Z the only politically-correct letter? Because all the other letters are not-Z's.
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Politically Correct One Liners
Which politically correct one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with politically correct? I can suggest the ones about not politically correct and technically correct.
- Why did the politically correct soccer team never win any matches? Because no offense.
- How do you define political correctness? Carefully.
- What do you call a politically correct large expensive house? A Persion.
- Merry Christmas! If that's politically correct.
- Political Incorrectness It's Political Correctness gone mad
- What's the politically correct term for a swingers party in Alabama? A lynching.
- I'm confused on the politically correct term for Caitlyn ... Transjenner...?
- Political correctness is just respecting people. Sorry, I meant "people of respect."
- How to be politically correct on black Friday? Call it African American Friday instead
- Telephone bills are never politically correct. They're all straight white mail.
- What is the politically correct term for a Natzi ? alt-right.
- Why aren't there any Politically Correct Track and Field athletes They don't see race
- What is the political correct term for hipster? conjoined twins.
- It's safe to say political correctness has gone mad.
- Did you hear Seinfeld on political correctness? He really went on the offensive about it.
Not Politically Correct Jokes
Here is a list of funny not politically correct jokes and even better not politically correct puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Political correctness has gotten so restrictive these days. Now I can't even say, "Black paint." I have to say, "Please paint that wall, Tyrone."
- I won the first place in the Political Correctness Quiz contest.. To be fair,so did everyone else...
- Trump is too politically incorrect, Hillary is too politically correct Yet they're both incorrect for politics
- No Longer PC It's no longer Politically Correct to call someone a "tweaker".
You now call them "Methican American". - What's the politically correct way to introduce your midget buddy? Say hello to my little friend.
- I don't care if it's not "politically correct"... But I think the president of Europe is a really nice guy
- What's the difference between comedy and political correctness? One is making light of a dark situation.
The other is making dark of a light situation. - Steve Jobs and Trump had one thing in common, both hated the PC culture Political correctness and pancreatic cancer.
- In the political correctness of 2017, is it still ok to call my wife the "ol ball and chain"? Or is that rude to the ball and chain?
- Politically correct I identify as as a comedian
My pronouns are HE HE HE HE HE HE HE HE HE HE
Hilarious Fun Politically Correct Jokes to Bring Joy & Laughter with Friends
What funny jokes about politically correct you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean good politician jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make politically correct pranks.
David received a parrot for his birthday.
The parrot was fully grown with a bad attitude and worse vocabulary.
Every other word was an obscenity.
Those that weren’t expletives, were to say the least, rude.
David tried hard to change the bird’s attitude and was constantly saying polite words, playing soft music, anything he could think of. Nothing worked.
He yelled at the bird and the bird yelled back.
He shocked the bird and the bird just got more angry and more rude.
Finally, in a moment of desperation, David put the bird in the freezer, just for a few moments.
He heard the bird squawk and kick and scream-then suddenly, there was quiet.
David was frightened that he might have hurt the bird and quickly opened the freezer door.
The parrot calmly stepped out and said “I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I’ll endeavor at once to correct my behavior. I really am truly sorry and beg your forgiveness.”
David was astonished at the bird’s change in attitude and was about to ask what had made such a dramatic change when the parrot continued, “May I ask what did the chicken do?”
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I hate how politically correct things are these days. You can't even say the word s**... without people getting offended.
I started to tell a Polish joke to a group of guys and one of them said "Hey, I'm Polish and that joke offends me!" Fair enough I thought, no one likes to be stereotyped. So I swapped out the word "Polish" for "s**..." and started the joke over. Same guy got offended.
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Un-politicly correct jokes.
What's worst than a r**...?
Depend what side you're on.
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Paraprosdokians
*A paraprosdokian is a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected in a way that causes the reader or listener to reframe or reinterpret the first part. Some paraprosdokians not only change the meaning of an early phrase, but they also play on the double meaning of a particular word, creating a form of syllepsis.*
Where there's a will ... I want to be in it.
I like going to the park and watching the children run around ... because they don't know I'm using blanks. (Emo Philips)
The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list.
You can always count on the Americans to do the right thing ... after they have tried everything else. (Winston Churchill)
I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
In filling out an application, where it says, 'In case of emergency, Notify:' ... I put 'DOCTOR'.
If I am reading this graph correctly ... I'd be very surprised. (Stephen Colbert)
You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
I don't belong to an organized political party. I'm a Democrat. (Will Rogers)
Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
I've had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it. (Groucho Marx)
You're never too old to learn ...something s**....
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I hate how politically correct the world is becoming...
No longer am I allowed to say "black paint." Now I have to say "Tyrone can you please paint."
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Everyone's so politically correct these days.
You can't even say "black paint" anymore. You have to say "Tyrone, would you kindly paint my fence?"
I'm sick of people saying, "Its political correctness gone mad!"
That's offensive. You should say "Its political correctness gone mentally ill".
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English Weather
I just read something about weather in England:
The Archbishop of Canterbury and The Royal Commission for Political Correctness announced today that the climate in the UK should no longer be referred to as _'English Weather'._
In order to no longer offend a sizable portion of the UK population, it will now be referred to as _'Muslim Weather'_ -- partly Sunni, but mostly s**...'ite.
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My neighborhood is so politically correct...
...they consider it a hate crime to misspell vinegar.
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Everything's so politically correct nowadays that you can't even say "black paint."
Instead you have to say "Jamaal please paint my fence."
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Saying s**... isn't very politically correct
I now say laughrican americans.
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Black paint
Political correctness has gone to far these days. You cant even say black paint any more, you have to say "Tyrone, please will you paint my house?"
PC problem
Political correctness has become so oppressive. I can't even say "Black paint" anymore, I have to say "Jamal would you please paint that fence?"
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Apparently I can't say black paint anymore because it's racist.
I have to say "Jerome please paint the fence" to be politically correct.. -_-
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Political correctness gone mad.
I can't even refer to my own child as my disabled son.
Apparently it's my "daughter."
A friend of mine is so politically correct....
At the deli he is afraid to ask for " white American " cheese.
Apparently it's no longer politically correct to direct a joke at any racial or ethic minority, so...
An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Gurkha, a Latvian, a Turk, an Aussie, two Kiwis, a German, an American, a South African, a Cypriot, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Mexican, a Spaniard, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Swede, a Finn, a Dane, a Romani, a Bulgarian, a Swiss, a Greek, a Bulgarian, a Singaporean, a Norwegian, a Libyan, a Hindu, a Muslim, a Monk, an Italian, a Serb, a Russian and an Ethiopian went to a bar.
The bouncer said, "I'm sorry, you can't come in here without a Thai"
I just bought the politically correct edition of Doctor Who.
What's the deal with all these Cyberpersons I keep hearing about?
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I cant stand this politically correct society much longer. I can't even order coffee anymore.
I used to go to the store and just say "I'll take my coffee black." Now I have to say "I'll take my coffee jeniqua."
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I'm trying to get in shape and be more politically correct.
I rehydrate with LGBTQtorade
During his speech after the Orlando shooting, Donald Trump refuses to be politically correct...
And just to be safe, he refuses to be correct.
I would talk about Keemstar
but I don't think autism jokes are politically correct anymore
How are you supposed to be politically correct...
How are you supposed to be politically correct and still have a gender reveal party?
Me and my step son were watching letters and numbers
Letters and numbers is a show where contestants are given a certain number of letters and 30sec to make the biggest word or 6 different numbers and 30sec to reach a target number using only those given once with the standard 4 operations.
So I'm watching with my son and one of the contestants is a dwarf/midget (the politically correct term) and he is smashing it! He managed to reach the target number in less than 10 seconds! And I go wow! He's so smart at maths.
My son turns to me and says
Because it's the little things that count.
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I hate how politically correct we have become as a society ...
You can't even say black paint anymore. Now you have to say, "Jamal kindly paint my house?"
Its such a shame todays world is so politically correct, you cant even say Black Paint anymore,
Instead you have to say "Leeroy please paint the porch"
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Political Correctness is out of hand
You can't even say "black paint" anymore,
You have to say "Tyrone, please paint my fence."
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I hate political correctness. You can't even say "black paint" anymore.
Instead you have to say "Leroy, would you please paint the fence?"
Things have become so politically correct, I can't even fat shame myself without looking over my shoulder.
Which i cant.
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Why is 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 is a "politically correct" millennial that shames 6 for his "even-number privilege".
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The World's Most Politically Correct Joke
THE WORLD'S MOST POLITICALLY CORRECT JOKE
A Christian, a Jew, a Hindu, a m**..., a Sikh, a Hare Krishna, a Buddhist, a Pagan, an Atheist, a 3rd wave feminist, a non-binary gender neutral otherkin, a transgender Black Lives Matter activist, a Jehovah's Witness and a Muslim walk into a bar that only serves gluten free, dairy free, eco friendly, carbon neutral, halal, kosher, non GM, fair trade, free range, vegan, recycled water.
Nobody said or did anything and an acceptable time was had by all.
Politically Correct Politicians
Because of its negative connotation, Waterboarding shall now be called: 'Forced Hydration.'
I tried to be politically correct for the holidays this year
but "Caucasian Christmas" proved considerably harder to sing than I expected...
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TIL that it's not politically correct to say someone is gay...
The preferred term is "Navy enlisted personnel."
Political Correctness
I know political correctness is a huge thing nowadays, but is it ok to say the word "Retarred" if I'm having my driveway paved over again?
Today things are so politically correct you can't even say firecracker...
...You have to say, Bill you're fired.
The "politically correct" culture has ruined the modern vernacular.
The other day, I asked a girl of she wanted to go back to my place and have gender.
Why are there no politically correct superheroes?
Because they don't want to assume the villain's agenda.
Calling someone "short" is racist and discriminatory
The politically correct term is "fun-sized"
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Politically correct 21st century equality the game.
White, heterosexual, cisgender people not included in this product.
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I saw a sign advertising a plowsharing market the other day.
I don't know if that's a more or less politically correct way of talking about a s**... party...
It may not be politically correct, but I wouldn't ever date someone who was born with deformed feet.
You could say I'm lack-toes intolerant.
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The new iPhones are at the c**... of political correctness
It's not XL, it's XS Max.
The United States finally outlawed the waterboarding of suspected terrorists!
They have decided to replace it with a more politically correct interrogation method: Tactical Baptism
It's not politically correct to say 'colored person' anymore.
Instead, we just say hue man
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Did you know that the term LGBTQ is not politically correct?
It excludes straight people.
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Not sure if this has been done before but oh well
Everybody is getting so politically correct nowadays you can't even say black, paint. You have to say Tyrone paint that wall.
I like those comedy shorts you see on YouTube sometimes.
Or 'dwarves', if you want to be all politically correct about it.
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It's okay if white people invade Mexico illegally, only speaking English, taking jobs, bringing gangs, r**... and drugs while demand citizenship?
That is the Politically Correct thing to do.
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Being PC
In a bid to be more politically correct a f**... home has announced plans to use new f**... cars.
They have set plans to introduce the new line as his and hearse f**... cars.
What did the politically correct whaler say when he saw a non-binary whale?
They/she blows.
The mlb is renaming the disabled list to the injured list .
I'm surprised by how easily it was for the Cleveland Indians to embrace using politically correct terminology.
What are the three quickest ways of spreading a rumour (or gossip).
Telegram
Telephone
Tell a woman
Perhaps not very politically correct in the times we live in, but worth a slight chuckle.
I hate how we have to be politically correct at the office. My boss said we shouldn't use the term "black" because it's not very professional.
So during coffee break, I asked him: *"How African-American do you like your coffee?"*
